Left Behind

By: Jayton Young

Copyright © Jayton Young 2011

WARNING: This book contains some explicit sexual content and Ménage (M/F/MM) situations.

Other Works

No More Running – Mystery/Suspense/Romance

Finding Aiden – Action/Romance (M/F/M)

For Their Happiness – Werewolf/Romance/Teen Fiction

Keep Reading after the story for an excerpt of Having Their Baby (A Left Behind Afterward)

Blurb

Marti has spent the last 10 years basically on her own. Her brothers had been at college and her three best friends had joined the military as a requirement to receive their inheritance. She lived through her father dying, then when she finally decided to attend a university, she lived through a very traumatic experience that leaves her mute and broken . But, somebody thinks he needs to finish the job he started.

Toby, Tory, and Troy are home now. Each of them honorably discharged after injuries sustained in the line of duty. They get home to find the love of their lives, and best friend, had changed. She is no longer the outgoing, bubbly, girl they once knew.

What will happen when they find out the reason why?

Prologue

10 years ago

It felt like the world was crashing down around me. My legs wouldn’t hold me anymore, and if it weren’t for the three sets of arms holding me, I would have fallen.

How could everyone just abandon me? Jordan, my older brother , left for Georgia State yesterday on his football scholarship. He wants to major on computer engineering. I’m very proud of him, but I’ll miss him so much. He is only three years older than me at eighteen, but he has practically raised James and me since Mommy died.

I still have my younger brother James and my dad, but James is starting the foreign exchange in a month, going to Japan, and of course Daddy has been a workaholic since he quit drinking when my mom died five years ago, so I never see him. He only comes home to sleep.

The people I thought I could count on, my best friends, are leaving. Toby, Tory, and Troy all had told me at different times that they would always be there for me. Now they are leaving to join different branches of the military as required by their grandfather ’s will to inherit the ranch and business that has been in their family for generations. In my head I know they have to go, but my heart won’t listen. I’ve been in love with them since I met them when my dad bought the land neighboring theirs when I was ten. For five years they have been coming to the ranch to learn everything from their Grampa Tobias. They have come to the ranch every summer and school holiday for their whole lives. Toby’s dad was a judge and hadn’t ever wanted the ranch, so it automatically went to the trips.

We had met the day my family moved next door to them. Dad and Jordan wouldn’t let me help unpack the moving van. They said I was too little, but they let James help, and he had been smaller than me!? How was that possible? I discovered , by their continued behavior later on , that they were just trying to protect and coddle me because I was the only girl left in the family. My name is Martha Mckayla Cunningham and everyone called me Kayla until Mommy died, then for some reason Daddy and the boys started calling me Marti, short for Martha of course . They let me go anywhere I wanted as long as I stayed on our property.

The day we moved I had been upset and crying because they wouldn’t let me help, so I walked around our land, which was mostly covered in trees, and found this beautiful bubbling creek in the woods a little ways from the house. I sat there crying when three identical boys , that looked to be Jordan’s age, came riding up to the fence that separated our lands.

“Whacha cryin’ for?” one of them said as they all got off their horses and led them to the water for a drink. They climbed over the fence and came to sit beside me.

“Nobody won’t let me help set up our new house. They told me to find something to do. I can help, and I wanna help, but they won’t let me!” I cried.

The boys on either side of me put their arms around my shoulders.

“Well, why don’t we find something to do? My name is Toby, what’s yours?” The one on the right said.

“They call me Marti.”

“Hey Marti! I’m Troy and that’s Tory.” The boy on the left said as he pointed to the boy beside Toby.

“Do you want to ride my horse?” Toby asked.

“I really want to, but Jordan told me to stay on our land.” I said, sad at not being able to ride.

“Well, you want to feed them? We each brought treats for them for the ride today.” Tory said.

“I’d love to, thanks!”

And after that day, we were practically inseparable. They became friends with all of us, but we were closer. I fell in love with them, but I could never choose between them, so I never said anything.

And now they were leaving.

“You know we will come here for all of our leaves. You’ll still see us, Pea.” Toby said using his endearment for me. They had each given me a different one.

“Cupcake, please don’t cry…” Troy said

“It breaks our heart, Princess. We promised you a long time ago there would be no need for tears while you are with us.” Tory said finishing Troy’s statement.

I looked up into their amber eyes. They were all so beautiful in a manly way, with buzz cut black hair and russet skin tone showing their Cherokee heritage. They all had the build of hard workers, and they kept getting bigger.

“That’s just it.” I cried. “I won’t be with you.”

Seeing the anguish on their faces, I tried to pull myself together. I hated myself for making them feel bad for leaving.

“Okay. I know y’all have to go. I’ll be alrigh t. We’re gonna write and like you said, I’ll see you on each of your leaves. I’ll be busy with school and work anyway. Y’all just have to promise me to be careful wherever you each are stationed.”

They each backed up and looked down at me (they are a foot taller than me at 6’3) and smiled.

“You know us…” Toby said.

“We are always…” Troy continued.

“Careful and in control, Princess.” Tory finished. They had a habit of sharing sentences thinking it was funny .

I laughed. “Thank you. Y’all always know what to say to make me feel better. I’ll miss all of you. I’ll be here waiting for everyone to come back.”

“What about your plans for college, Pea?” Toby asked.

“I’ll be going to community college. Dad needs someone to keep him sane. You know he never cooks anymore, and wouldn’t eat if it weren’t for me shoving the plate in his face as soon as he gets home every day.” I exaggerated a sigh. “It’s nice to be needed.”

“We’ll always need ya, Cupcake. But you’ll have to do the beatin’ of any boys comin’ your way. Just remember what we taught ya.” Tory said.

“Yeah, yea h , fight dirty and fight to win. I gotcha.”

I watched as my boys finished loading their SUV. They each gave me a long hug and a peck on the mouth. They got in, and I watched them drive down the gravel driveway until I couldn’t see them anymore.

And then I was alone.

Chapter 1

I woke up drenched in sweat. It’s not really unusual for me anymore. More like the norm. I got up and took a shower before heading down the dark hallway to the kitchen. The hall is not that long, but it’s dark because I keep my whole house that way. I like to keep the windows covered by the drapes and all of the doors closed . I am so paranoid about someone looking in to the house through the windows , even though I am surrounded by the woods except for my gravel driveway, but even that is canopied by trees .

I’m still in the house Daddy bought fifteen years ago. He died two years ago, but left the house to me along with a hefty life insurance policy that neither my brothers nor I knew about. He only left it to me, explaining that he loved all of us, but had taken me for granted for all those years I cared for him. He said he did appreciate it, but he hadn’t known how to talk to me because I reminded him too much of our mother. He said for us not to morn him that he was happy that he would finally be with Mommy again since he’d been saved. Come to find out, Daddy had liver cance r from all of the years of drinking he did before Mommy died. He didn’t want treatment, because he missed Mommy to o much and was happy that he would be reunited with her. Jordan and James weren’t upset about the money or the house. Daddy had paid for their education and got them into their own apartments , though Jordan moved back in with me so I wouldn’t be alone . I shared the money with them anyway.

I went to the island workstation that has a sink, built in fryer, and a built in flat surface stove top. James, being an architect , designed the remodel of my kitchen. He built me my dream kitchen and put in all of the most up to date appliances for me.

I put a pot of water on to boil for my morning grits, and got a frying pan out to fix Jordan his eggs before he headed into his home office for the day, if he didn’t have any other plans . He owns an internet security company. He also build s websites for people. He does really well for himself. I set my sweet iced tea and his orange juice and coffee on the table, and then finished cooking our breakfast.

I couldn’t talk or make any sounds anymore due to an incident that happened last year, so I typed that breakfast was ready into the voice machine that Jordan built for me and set it for loud so it could call Jordan for me. I laughed silently like I do every time I use it for that, because it shouts louder than I used to.

A couple of minutes later, Jordan walked in.

“Good morning, Sis!” He said sitting down at the booth-like table next to the bay wind ows. “What masterpiece did you make for me this morning?”

‘A farmer’s omelet.’ I signed to him. Jordan, James and I all took an ASL course, after we learned I would never be able to speak again, to make communicating easier than having to write or type everything. The doctors had wanted me to get an artificial voice box, but I didn’t want anyone ever cutting on me again, so I declined.

‘What are your plans for today ?’ I asked him.

“I’ll be spending today up in Charlotte to get the updated equipment I need. I’ll be stopping in town on my way back to stock up on groceries and supplies. Make your list of what you need.”

‘You should have told me last night. That way y ou wouldn’t have to wait on me . I reprimanded . I’ve got a pretty long list .’

I started making the list out while I finished eating my grits.

“What are your plans?” He asked after he had finished eating and was rinsing his plate to put in the dishwasher.

I put down my pen so I could answer. ‘I’ll just be working on my book today .’ I had decided to write a book using a story I had started in high school. I had several stories I wanted to try to get published if the first one went well .

“Please, stay inside today. You can use my office if you’d like, but I’d rather you didn’t go to the creek while I’m not here. Even with your panic bracelet, I won’t be close enough to help if something happens.”

I usually did my writing at the creek. It was my thi nking place because I always fe l t so safe and tranquil there. It was my favorite place be cause it was our place. The triplets’ and mine. Since I went out there so often and couldn’t yell if something happened, Jordan had made me a bracelet that had an electronic device in it where if I were to push the button, it would immediately alert him through his masculine version of my bracelet. He was very protective of me, and worried every time I left the house. Not that I ever go anywhere.

‘I wasn’t planning on it. I said in answer to his plea. I was just going to lie in bed and use the laptop. I’m feeling lazy today .’

“Are you alright?”

‘Yeah , I just had another nightmare. For some reason it left me feeling drained .’ I said.

“Okay, if you’re sure. Hey! I forgot to tell you. James called around 2 o’clock this morning saying that he’s moving back to Fort Mill.” He said getting all excited. “He said that he took the licensing exams for South Carolina online last week and passed. He’s gonna move back in here until he builds his own house. He wants to buy some of this land off you so he can be close to us. He is also bringing Shelby with him. They finally got engaged, so she’ll be moving down here and in with him once he get s the house built.”

‘I’ll give him the land. It belongs to both of you just as much as it does to me. And Shelby can move in here with us. She doesn’t have to wait if she do es n’t want to .’ I kind of like d the fact that my whole family will be with me again.

“Dad left all this to you, and you deserve it. We were never mad about that, but we both just want to stay close to you. I missed you too much while I was in Georgia, and James feels the same way. I swear, I don’t know how he’s stayed away this long. Y’all were always more like twins, even being eleven months apart.” He paused as he ate the last of his coffee. “That was one of Mom’s favorite things to tell people. She loved how close you two were and that you were even in the same grade ‘cause of your birthday and the school cut off dates. Remember all of the stories she used to tell us about when y’all were babies. She always referred to you as ‘the babies’, not Kayla and James.”

‘Yeah , I remember. I’ve missed him too. I love both of you very much. I don’t think I would have made it after everything happened if you hadn’t been here with me. And I know he tried his best to be here as much as possible. I’m just happy he’ll finally be home for good. I’ll be able to see both of you every day , even if he does stay in his own house. At least he’s bringing me a new sister with him.’

I got to thinking. My family would finally be here with me. If only Toby, Tory, and Troy would come home, everything would be perfect.

******************************************************

I was sitting on the bed in my room, on my laptop writing, when I heard the rattle of chains. My head whipped up, looking towards my door. I knew nothing in my house would make that sound. I didn’t like chains, and wouldn’t allow them on my property. They brought back too many p ainful memories. Maybe Jordan wa s home and he forgot? No, I knew he would never forget , either. Jordan knew why I hated chains and would never do that to me.

I slowly put the laptop down, got off the bed as quietly as possible, and grabbed the alu minum baseball bat I always had sitting beside the nightstand. I was barefoot, so I didn’t make a sound as I tiptoed to the bedroom door. I slowly went down the hall, looking in all the doors-which we keep open at all times due to my paranoia-and made my way to the great room. It is an open space that combines the living room, den, and dining room. What I saw made me let out a silent scream and break down into sobs. Chains were hanging from the ceiling. Some had handcuffs attached at the end, and some had hooks. I couldn’t tear my eyes away. A hand landed on my shoulder, and a voice said, “I’ve missed our games, Kayla. Time to play.”

**************************************************************

I shot up from the bed, dropping the laptop on the floor, and looked around the room franticly. I started crying, even though I knew it was just another nightmare. I was never going to be able to have a normal sleep again. All this time had passed and I still couldn’t close my eyes without those images coming back to haunt me.

My laptop had broken in half because it was open when it fell, so after I washed my face, I picked it up off the floor, taking it to Jordan’s office. I knew he would be able to fix it.

I looked at the clock and saw I had missed lunch, and it was getting to be time for dinner. Jordan would be home soon. I sent him a quick text message asking him to stock me up on my Red Bulls , caffeinated teabags, and No-Doze. I needed all the help I could to stay awake. I had drunk my iced tea, but I was out of Red Bulls, and look what happened. I could get by several days with just light dozing and not actually sleeping and reaching the REM cycle of my sleep where I dream, but I always end up crashing out for a day to catch up. The thing with that is, even the crash wouldn’t refresh me because of the nightmares.

I just didn’t feel safe anymore, even with my big brother here. I tried t o hide it from him, but he knew. I could tell he felt bad that he couldn’t help me more, but he wa s amazing anyway . I couldn’t have ask ed for two better brothers than the ones I have. I was just too messed up in the head for them to be able to help me. I t wasn’t their fault.

I went into the kitchen to make supper, and for the next hour, lost myself in listening to my Bose stereo system and cooking my special home-made seafood jambalaya. I was doing the dishes I had used while cooking, when Jordan walked in with grocery bags hanging off his arms.

“Sis, I smelled your cookin’ from out in the driveway.” He said. “You are an angel from heaven. I haven’t eaten since breakfast, and I am sooooo hungry.”

I went to help him put the bags down then turned and signed, ‘You are not supposed to skip meals William Jordan .’ I crossed my arms over my chest, and gave him my best ‘you know better’ look.

“Don’t look at me like that, Marti. I bet you didn’t eat either.” He looked pointedly at me. “You never stop to eat when you’re writing . Even when you’re not writing, you don’t take care of yourself so don’t lecture me. I was trying to hurry so I could get home to your cookin’.”

I started to tear up realizing how much of his freedom he’d given up to come home to watch out for me.

‘I’m sorry J. I know I don’t have room to talk .’ I said He came and gave me a big bear hug. “Please don’t cry. I wasn’t fussin’. I just worry about you.”

I pulled away from him so I could sign to him. ‘I know you worry. I worry about you, too. You used to go out. You used to have girlfri ends , but you stopped doing all of that . You gave everything up to come take care of me. I feel like I’ve messed things up for you.’

“No, Marti. I wanted to come here. If I had been here…”

‘No! That happened because I was stupid!’ I signed with rapid, jagged movements to emphasize I meant it. ‘Don’t you dare play the ‘what if’ game. No one is to blame except for me and that phycho. I knew better than to…’ I couldn’t finish. I couldn’t think about it anymore or I’d break down again, so I turned and started put ting the groceries up. Jordan helped me, knowing me well enough to drop it, and then he fixed drinks while I fixed us each a bowl.

“Did you make good progress on your book today?”

‘No. I only got one chapter done and didn’t even get to the editing of that .’ I usually edited as I went along since I was my own editor for this first book. I had decided to publish it as an e-book if I couldn’t get a publisher interested. That way I could establish myself as an author and it would be easier to gain the attention of the publishers if my name was already out there.

“What happened? You usually get more than that done. You had all day.”

‘I fell asleep.’ I knew I didn’t have to explain beyond that. He knew about my nightmares and virtual fear of sleep because of it.

“Oh. Hey! Did James call you?” He asked. I knew he was trying to change the subject and get my mind off the topic.

Just then the phone rang. “Get that. It must be him calling now.”

I have a phone with a keyboard attached so I could type what I wanted to say. I looked at the caller ID and sure enough it was James.

I picked it up and typed ‘Hello ’.

“Hey Sissy! Has Jordan told you my good news yet?” His voice was deep, but it was as bubbly as ever. He always was hyped up and chipper. Not much could ever get him down.

‘Yep. He told me at breakfast, so what took y ou so long to call and tell me ?’

He waited for me to type and for the voice machine to talk. It was kind of a slow process to have a phone conversation, but he and Jordan never had a problem waiting. They were happy to have a way to talk to me when they weren’t there.

“Sorry, please don’t be mad, but I was just getting everything ready for the move. I even found rental space in Fort Mill to use as an office, AND I already have a job offer to design the new Town Hall there, SOOO I’ll be there tomorrow if that’s ok ay .” He said. I could tell how excited he was.

‘Of course it’s okay ! I can’t wait for you to get here. I’ve missed you so much .’ I typed. ‘And you need to go ahead and bring Shelby, too. She can live here with you until you build your own house.’

“No. Shelby’s just going to visit on weekends. She still has one semester left before she can transfer here to do her internship at the hospital in Rock Hill.”

‘I just want you to let her know that she is welcome here. Tell her I can’t wait until she is finally my sister.’

“I’ll tell her. I’ll see you tomorrow, Sissy. I love you.”

‘Love you, too. Bye.’

“Bye.” He said before he hung up.

Jordan had been opening the mail while I’d been talking to James. He turned to me with a letter in his hand.

“Guess who is coming home.” He said with a smile. “This is from Toby. They are finally bringing the troops home. He said once they get stateside , him and Troy will b e moving to reserve status. Tor y is being honorably discharged. He won’t have to serve anymore after all of his injuries.”

‘What injuries?’ I asked. I never opened the mail, so Jordan always read the letters from the trips first. I had never read one saying anything about one of them being hurt.

“Oh, daggumit! I wasn’t supposed to tell you. They knew you’d be upset.” He said. I could tell he was upset with himself for letting it slip. “Before you get mad at them, remember what you are keeping from them. Every time they have been able to call, I’ve covered for you. None of you can get mad at the others.”

‘I know. You’re right.’

I was feeling so many things at the moment. Ecstatic, impatient, sad, scared. Things had changed, but I still loved my boys. They were finally coming home to me, and even I didn’t know how I’d react. I was happy they were coming, but would I be able to be around them? For a year and a half I have panicked if anyone came near me other than my brothers. Would I be able to handle the trips?

Chapter 2

I was looking at myself in the mirror, trying to see myself as others saw me. My brothers had told me after everything happened, that I was still beautiful, but I had never been beautiful. I had always just been average. I have a good complexion , though I have a scar from my right ear to the right corner of my mouth that mars it . My skin color matches that of my brothers, a caramel color because of our mixed race. Daddy was black and Mommy was white. Our Mommy used to get complimented about her beautiful children wherever we would go. Looking back into the mirror, I looked at my hazel eyes. They seemed dull to me. You used to be able to see the sparkle in my eyes, be able to tell how I was feeling. Maybe that was why they were dull. I just felt numb most of the time. I didn’t take time with my hair anymore . I would just put the moisturizer in it, and then put it in a pony tail. I was 5’6 and not fat, but not thin either. I was thick, with curves. At least that was the way I looked at it.

I wondered, not having seen the trips in two years, would they like the way I look now? Nah, I had too many scars. Unless I wore a body suit with a mask, gloves, and shoes. But it was too hot right now to get by with that.

I got dressed in a pair of jean shorts and a purple tank top and slid on my purple flops. I was going to spend the day at the creek writing since Jordan had fixed my laptop last week.

I had spent the weekend with James catching up on all the happenings with him, but he was going to start working in his office today. I really wished he would turn one of the other rooms into an office for himself, but he said clients needed to be able to have easy access to him, and we lived kind of far out of town.

“Hey, Sissy! Will you please come with me today?” James said coming into the bathroom behind me. “I’ll even set you up with an office in the back so you won’t be out in the open when people come in.”

I shook my head. ‘I don’t even go to town anymore. I can’t be o ut in the open. You know that.’

“Cooommmme oonnnnn.” He w h ined while bouncing up and down. “Pleeeeeaaasssee!”

‘You sound like a five year old.’ I signed, laughing silently.

“Well, we’ve had such a good time this weekend; I don’t want it to be over . Plus, we used to plan this business together. I would design all the cool buildings, and you would take care of the business. You would be both Jordan’s and my business manager. That way we all would always be together.”

‘I know that, but you also know things changed. I never even finished getting my degree. How could I be the manager now?’

James got a sad look in his eyes. “I know that things changed. Things happen sometimes, but you can’t shut yourself away for the rest of your life. Let me and Jordan be your crutch . We’re worried about you.”

‘I can deal with this on my own .’ I lied. ‘I’m n ot going to bring you two down.’

“You’re not bringing us down, Marti . We are trying to hold you up.” He said quietly. “Please just try for me. Just today, and if you can’t handle it, I won’t ask again.”

I sighed. ‘Alright.’ I knew James really wanted me to go, and I just couldn’t tell him no . ‘I’ll go make our breakfast, and then w e can go. I will honestly try.’

“Yay!” He immediately started bouncing again with a huge smile on his face. “Can you fix me waffles?”

********************************************************************

As we rode through town in James’ Ford F-150, I kept my head down and read a book so I wouldn’t be able to see anyone we passed, and I could take my mind off it for a bit. It didn’t work though. I started sweating and hyperventilating.

“Come on, Sissy. We’re almost there. You’ve done real good, you can make it.” He said as he grabbed my hand and squeezed.

We finally reached his new office not long after that, and I made a bee-line for the door because there were people walking down Main Street. I knew people would be curious and nosey as to who the people are that moving onto the Main Street strip. I know that most people either know us or at least know of us. I didn’t want anyone coming up to me. James could deal with all that.

I unlocked the door with the key James gave me and walked in. It was an amazing office. It was an open floor design that had pedestals with models of some of James’ building designs, and there was a huge reception desk in the middle. Along the back wall were a bathroom, a water cooler, and a glass enclosed office with James’ name on a name plate on the door . It looked like it was made of gold. In that office there was a mahogany desk, a chair, and a drafting table. On the left wall of the main space was an office that only had a window to be able to look out to the back of the building to where the town park was. If the door was closed, there was no window to be able to look in. I noticed that on this door was a gold nameplate with my name on it. He had already planned on me coming with him. I could tell how much he really wanted this. I would do my best for him.

The day was spent organizing the little things, and I went over the books that he had kept from when he was in New York. He had moved there after he had graduated college, and had done very well for himself. Even if his company took a while to get established here, it would still be in the black from all the business he had done while up north.

People had come in throughout the day to welcome James. They all had asked about me, but I wouldn’t come out of my office. When every thing happened a little over a year ago, it had made national news and was a big story, so of course a small town like Fort Mill would still be talking about it. James never gave any details. He just told them that I had recovered and that I was up and around. I had spent a month in the hospital, and then a mon th of in bed rehab at home. After that, it took six months of home physical therapy for me to finally be on my own two feet.

Toby, Tory, and Troy all wrote about once a month, but I had asked my brothers not to tell them what happened. Whenever they came home on leave, Jordan would make up some excuse as to why I wasn’t around. I didn’t want them to see me as I was. I was ashamed, and also the fact that I knew they’d have to go back. I didn’t want them to worry about me and then get injured because their mind wasn’t where it was supposed to be. They were all Spec Ops for different branches of the military. Toby was an Army Ranger specializing in communication , Tory was a Navy Seal specializing in technology , and Troy was in the Green Berets as a computer specialist . He and Jordan both had always been good at anything having to do with computers, so it made since that they would both get a degree in computer technology. I was very proud of them. They each had made it through the intensive training on their own. They ha d also each gotten a degree in their specialty so that benefited their group.

They would each come home at different times next week.

******************************************************************

The rest of the week went like that, but the well wishers and visi tors dwindled in numbers to where, on Friday, only the Mayor and a special committee for the town hall rebuild were the only ones to come in.

It was Saturday morning and Shelby had come down for the weekend. I was fi xing breakfast for us and James - Jordan had gone to Georgia on business for the weekend - and we were trying to decide what to do for the day.

“I’ve never been to Carowinds before. Can we go there?” Shelby asked. She was a very sweet, very petite, blond . She had the same color of hazel eyes as me.

“Not today, honey,” James answered. “Jordan’s not home and I don’t want to leave Sissy here by herself all day.”

That made me angry. I was older than him and he acted like he had to babysit me. I was twenty-five years old for goodness sake! I could take care of myself. Before I could retort, Shelby spoke back up.

“I was talking about all of us. I would never leave her out, she’s like the sister I never had.” She said.

That was so sweet. I felt the same way towards her. We talked on the phone every other day almost. Not to mention the times she came with James for visits. We had gotten real close .

“Sorry sweet.” James answered. “I thought I had told you when you asked why she never came to visit us. Marti suffers agoraphobia. She had a fear of people and crowds. That’s why she never goes anywhere unless she’s with me or Jordan, and only if it’s a place to where she won’t be around anyone else.”

She looked at me. “I’m so sorry, Marti! I didn’t know. We can do something around here.”

I was using my voice keyboard to be in the conversation since Shelby wasn’t proficient in ASL yet. ‘No. Why don’t you and James go to Carowinds. I’ll stay here and write some more on my book. James acts like I need supervision. I can be and have be en on my own. I won’t hurt me.’

“I’m sorry, Sissy. I don’t mean it like that. I just worry that something will happen, and I won’t be around to help . Like last time. I’ll never forgive myself for that.”

I flinched when he said that, but I couldn’t let him blame himself . ‘That was not your fault. That was me making stupid decisions, and trusting someone I didn’t know. It would have happened even if you two were here. I can’t stand that y’all blame yourselves.’ I gave him a big hug and a kiss on the cheek.

Just then Jordan walked in. I got up, ran to him and threw myself in his arms for one of his bear hugs.

“Man,” He laughed. “Somebody would think I’d been gone for a week instead of just one night.”

I backed up so I could sign to him. ‘What hap pened? Why are you home early?’

“My Mustang broke down. I had to call a tow truck, so I rescheduled my appointment and rented a car to come home.”

‘I’m sorry it didn’t work out for you, but I’m glad you’re home.’ I told him. ‘I have an idea. Why don’t we go outsi de and play two on two soccer?’

“Sounds great!” James said, then turned to tell Shelby wha t I had suggested.

“I haven’t played since middle school, but I used to be pretty good . We could do boys versus girls. I bet Marti and me would kick your butts.” She s aid getting excited.

We played three games, always switching the players around, and had a lot of fun. At lunchtime we went in and ate som e deli sandwiches I had fixed up.

‘Why don’t y’all go to Carowinds now?’ I said to James . ‘Jordan can tell you that he’s left me before, and I’ll be alrigh t. I’ll stay around the house.’

“What’s goin’ on bro?” Jordan asked.

“I just didn’t want to leave Sissy here by herself. In case something happens .”

“Look, Marti can take care of herself. She stays here by herself all the time as I have to leave for appointments.” Jordan grabbed the wrist that had my bracelet on it to show James. “I made this for her. It’s along the lines of the Life Alert system. All she has to do is press the pendant.” He said as he pressed it. As soon as he did, his bracelet started beeping like a pager. He pushed a gold plate on his bracelet to make the beeping stop. “It lets me know she’s in trouble, and I get to her as fast as I can.”

James and Shelby had been watching everything when Shelby finally spoke up.

“That’s really cool, but how do you know where to find her? You can’t hear her if she screams.”

Jordan took out his Droid Razor phone and clicked on an icon with my name on it. “This is basically a GPS that is tuned into her bracelet for me to be able to find her. If she is taken again,” I flinched as he said that. “Or if she loses the bracelet somehow, I have implanted a chip in the back of her neck that has the same frequency, so we will still be able to find her.”

James shot out of his seat. “YOU CHIPPED HER LIKE A DOG?!!!” He yelled.

I stood up and went to him. ‘I volunteered when he asked me. I w ould rather be safe than sorry.’ I signed, and he started to calm down. I had tears in my eyes because I was thinking of what had happened to me. ‘If I had had this when he got me, h e wouldn’t have been able to take me where nobody could find me, and he wouldn’t have been able to…..do the things he did for two weeks. I can’t live through that again. But I won’t completely give up my life waiti ng for him to come back either.’

“What do you mean waiting for him to come back?” James said.

I hadn’t meant to let that slip. I looked at Jordan. He just shrugged his shoulders. He had told me to tell James about th e e-mails and letters. I looked back at James and s aw him looking between me and Jordan.

‘Don’t be mad at J. He told me to tell you, but I didn’t want you to worry more than you already were.’ I told him.

“What has happened?”

‘He started sending me e-mails and letters saying he missed me and was going to come for me. That was when I changed my e-mail account. We don’t think he knows where I live, s ince our mail goes to a PO Box .’

James turned to ask Jordan if he’d gone to the police.

“I took all the letters there, but they haven’t found anything. No fingerprints and they have a different post mark each time.”

“This is why we shouldn’t leave her on her own, Jordan.” James said.

“She is an adult. Are you going to take all her freedom away? She can make her own decisions.”

They went back and forth. Shelby just looked at me with sympathy. I took the keyboard, turned it to loud and typed.

‘SHE IS RIGHT HERE!!!’ It yelled.

The boys both turned my way and muttered “Sorry”, and Shelby snickered at how much they sounded like little boys.

I had been using my sign language to talk, but after remembering Shelby, I used the keyboard.

‘I can make decisions for myself, and , even with no voice, I can speak for myself. From now on, James, I’ll always let you know what is going on. But I won’t let you run my life. It’s working right now. I have a routine that I stick to that now includes working with you. I love both of you, but let’s just act like this conversation never happened, and go back to the way it was before.’

Eventually James and Shelby went to Carowinds, but Jordan didn’t want to go. He said he’d been up most of the night waiting for the tow truck, calling the shop about sending it there, and finding a rental car. He went to his room and laid down for a nap.

I went and took a shower since I was all dirty and sweaty from the soccer. When I got out and got dressed, I took out my laptop and settle down to write. After about an hour, I heard knocking at my window. There was no way I was going to open the drapes to see what was going on , so I went to Jordan’s room and woke him.

‘Someone is at my window.’ I signed.

Jordan jumped and went to sneak out the back door. I followed just to wait in the great room. I couldn’t hear anything and h e’d been gone for ten minutes. I was about to call the police and put on the emergency recording Jordan had made for me when the front door banged open, and I saw a huge figure standing there blocking out the light.

Chapter 3

I wasn’t going to wait around. I knew it wasn’t Jordan, so I ran. I went out the back door and into the woods. I knew a thousand hiding places I could go, and then I could text James and let him know that something had happened to Jordan. That was the only explanation. I knew he’d never allow someone in our house willingly. I started crying. What if the phycho had gotten to him? I could never live with the knowledge of me being the reason one of my brothers were hurt. They were my life. They were all I had left, and here I was running away like the coward I was, but I couldn’t make myself turn around to check on him either.

I ran past the creek onto the triplet’s land. There was a group of trees and bushes that were gathered in a way that created a hollow space inside. It was kind of like a cave. I had found it on one of my many explorations over the years. I had even lined it with a tent on the inside to make it rain proof.

I crawled inside and sat down. When I reached for my phone in my pocket, I realized I had left it in my room. So I just sat and waited and cried and prayed that Jordan was still alive.

All I could think of at that moment was about how all of this was my fault. I could remember how my nightmare began with me being lonely and someone acting sweet to me and listening to my problems. I had met a man online who went by the name of Blain Robinson. We met in a chat room about books and were discussing the latest Laurell K. Hamilton book. We would always read books together, discussing them afterward and comparing opinions. We had both had such a love of reading. Blain said that reading was his escape from past memor ies he’d rather forget, but they still tormented him. He would never go into detail, but I supported him and told him I’d always listen if he needed an ear. We talked over e-mail and phone for four months.

When I moved to Florence to attend Francis Marion University, Blain asked if we could go on a date since he just live d one town over. I, being stupid back then, told him yes. He took me to a park and pushed me in a swing while we talked, and then we went out to eat. It w as so romantic in my opinion, s o after that we started dating regularly. After about two months of dating, he tried to get me into bed with him. I told him I wasn’t ready for that, and he seemed understanding. Two days later, when he picked me up for our da te, he attacked me; injecting me with something that knocked me out.

I woke up in what he called his ‘play room’ chained to the wall, naked. He told me that I was his perfect slave, but he just needed to train me. He explained the roles of master and slave to me thinking that I would agree to the arrangement . When I started disagreeing with him, he gagged me and beat me with a whip until the whole front of my body was covered in blood. He told me that when I talked back, or even made a sound, that there would be consequences. He gave me a sponge bath and sewed up some of the cuts that were too deep to heal on their own. Blain said that it was his job to take care of his slave, an d that he knew what was best for me .

He then tortured me getting worse and worse until during one of his ‘punishments’, the whi p he was using, missed it’s mark when I jumped, and he got me in the throat. I had lost my voice from screaming anyway, so I didn’t notice it was permanent. When I woke from that, he was gone, and I was no longer chained but laying in a bed. I still don’t know why he let me go that day just to say later he wanted me back.

I came out of my thoughts when I heard Jordan calling for me in the distance. There was another voice calling out, too. A voice I hadn’t heard in two years. I quickly crawled out of my hide-away and ran towards the shouts. I came to a halt when I saw a tall hulking figure beside my brother. He had shiny black buzz-cut hair, sharp cheekbones, a perfect nose, and full red lips. A tear rolled out of my eye when I realized that I couldn’t bring myself any closer to him, but I still couldn’t take my eyes off of him.

Toby and Jordan both started coming towards me. I took a step back, scared of him getting any closer. Jordan realized and came to me and gave me one of his bear hugs and whispered to me.

“I didn’t tell him anything yet.”

I just nodded and started walking with him, and hid ing behind him at the same time . I was trying to hide while I was still unable to stop watching Toby.

“No hug for me, Pea?” He asked

All I could do was shake my head.

“Come on and walk back to the house with us.” Jordan said. “I know you don’t understand, but could you walk in front of us a little.”

Toby looked at us skeptically. “Of course, but what’s going on? What’s wrong?”

“It’s not my story to tell, Toby, but I think Sis will explain a little when we get there.” Jordan answered sadly putting his arm around me.

I turned to him so Toby wouldn’t see, and signed, ‘I can’t tell him what happened.’

Jordan leaned down to me. “Just tell him as much as you are comfortable with , but he deserves some explanation.” He whispered in my ear.

I nodded.

When we were almost home, Toby turned his head to ask, “Will you not even talk to me, Pea? Are you mad at me?”

“She’s not mad at you, man. I swear.” Jordan answered for me.

“J, dude, can you at least tell me if she was really not home all those times, or was she avoiding us?”

“She was home most of those times, but it’s not what you think . Just give her time to explain.”

I could tell Toby was getting upset. “It doesn’t sound like she’s trying to explain anything.”

I looked at him, tears spilling down my cheeks, pleading with my eyes for him to understand.

“Please,” Jordan said. “There is a good reason, just wait a minute.”

“I’m going to, but you know I’ve never been patient. This here is a completely different reception to me coming home than what I was expecting.” He wouldn’t look at me as he said this, but I could tell from the sound of his voice that I was hurting him by not talking. I took a deep breath, reminded myself that he would never hurt me, walked up to him, and took his hand in mine. His hand was so much bigger than mine.

He looked down at me and gave me a curious smile, but that smile disappeared as he got a c loser look at my face. His eyes hardened and he glanced at Jordan, but didn’t say anything. He would wait until we got to the house to get the explanation . Squeezing my hand tight in his, we kept walking.

We finally made it to the house and I led him to the kitchen and indicated for him to sit in the stool at the island. Jordan stood propped on the counter and I walked to the breakfast nook to sit where my keyboard was, Toby watching the whole time.

I typed, ‘I can’t speak anymore.’ And looked at him, waiting for a response.

Toby looked from me to Jordan and back again, confused.

“Say what?”

‘I am mute. My voice box was damaged beyond repair, so I can no longer speak, scream, laugh out loud, or any of the things tha t make sound besides breathing.’

He sat up straight on the stool. “WHAT? Why? What the hell happened?”

‘I had a bad relationship about two years ago. It lasted for about six months. It turns out that he was crazy.’

“Oh my God. Pea, is that where all the scars came from?”

‘Yes. He kidnapped me and held me for two weeks. I can’t talk about it.’ I said pushing the keyboard away.

“Why didn’t anyone tell us in any of the phone calls or letters?” When he thought for a minute he asked, “We got leave together two years ago for the funeral. I didn’t even know you were seeing anyone.”

I brought the keyboard back over to me and typed. ‘At that point I had only talked to him in emails and on the phone. I wasn’t dating him. We didn’t start dating until after I started college.’ By that point, my hands were shaking and tears were leaking out of my eyes.

Toby saw how upset I was getting and took a deep breath and let it out. “Well that thing is cool, where’d you get it?” He said pointing to the keyboard, trying to change the subject a little for me.

After that we just talked about the things Jordan had made for me, and the fact that I could use sign language to communicate. Come to find out, the trips had an uncle that had been deaf, so they all knew ASL to be able to talk to me. The rest of the evening was spent catching up until after supper, Toby and I went on a walk .

Chapter 4

As soon as we stepped out of the back door, I knew where we would head. I walked a little to the back of Toby, paranoid of having someone to where I couldn’t watch them. I knew it was stupid. The trips had always protected me. They would never hurt me. My heart knew this, but my thick head kept getting in the way.

“Are we going to avoid conversation?” Toby asked, looking at me with one eyebrow raised.

‘Of course not. Why do you ask?’ I signed.

“Well, I can’t walk backwards to watch you speak, so it would be nice if you joined me up here.”

I just looked at him warily for a minute. I guess he could feel my conflicting thoughts, because he stopped, turned to me, and grabbed both of my hands. I flinched at the contact, but didn’t take my hands away.

He looked into my eyes, I guess to try to read what was really going on, before he spoke.

“Pea, I’ve always cared so much about you. The four of us have had a connection from day one. We didn’t let too many people in back then with all the crap going on in our family at the time, but we all took one look at you and knew you were something special. None of us would ever hurt you in any way. You mean too much to us. You know that right.”

I did know that, I never had any doubt about it, so I nodded. I took my hands from his grasp so I could sign what I wanted to say.

‘I do know that, Toby, but you have to understand that I haven’t had any contact with people other than my brothers and doctors since it all happened. I can’t even let the doctors touch me if J or James is not there. Even with my brothers it took a while before I could tolerate their touch. I’m going to try really hard, because you boys mean a lot to me too.’ Of course I was in love with them all, but I couldn’t tell him that. ‘You have to be patient with me. Like just now. I flinched, but you kept hold of my hands. My first reaction will be to pull back or run ; at least for a while. I’m trying to get past what has been done to me, but it is difficult. Just please realize that it is not you personally that I’m reacti ng to. It’s just instinct right now.’

“I can live with that. Just as long as I know it’s not me. Come on. I haven’t been to our place in a long time.” He said. He grabbed one of my hands back and we started walking side by side in comfortable silence.

There was a harvest moon out; you know the huge bright moon, so everything was illuminated for our walk. I could hear the crickets chirping and the grass, leaves, and undergrowth was damp from the dew already forming. The creek was surrounded by the green overgrowth if vines and bushes. We found our rock, well more like a boulde r, on the side of the creek that we always sat on . It ha d been our rock. Troy had even carved all of our names into it.

We sat side by side for a few minutes, listening to the water bubbling over the big smooth pebbles underneath. It had always been a place I went to get some peace, and to be able to think. The familiar sight and sounds there were very soothing.

Toby turned to me, pulling one knee up and pro pping his arm on it, while stretching out his other leg. “I know you started out at the University, I won’t ask you to talk about what happened, but I was wondering if you ever got your degree.”

I turned to him and sat Indian style so he could see me more clearly. My heart had sped up when he mentioned the University, but he said I wouldn’t ha ve to talk about it, so I was able to calm down.

‘I dropped out after everything that happened.’ I signed. ‘James said it didn’t matter though, and that I could get my degree online when I was ready,’

“I knew you and your brothers had planned on working together. Are y’all doing that?”

‘Well, James just moved back a little over a week ago. He is renting an office space in town, and guilted me into working in the office with him. It’s not too bad, I have my own space, but I have an attack if too many peo ple start coming in at one time, so I never leave my office. Other than that, it is alright.’

“What kind of attack do you have and why?” He asked

‘I keep forgetting you don’t know stuff. I have quit e a few phobias now, a couple of them being the fear of people, crowds, and op en spaces. It’s stupid I know.’ I looked down blushing. I hated the fact that he would see how weak I’d become.

“Look at me.” He commanded. It took me a minute to have the nerve, but when I looked up, he spoke softly. “Don’t hide your face from me . Ever. There is nothing to be ashamed of. You are beautiful and strong. You’ve been through some rough shit, but so have we all. We all have our own scars, both physical and mental, but we’ll heal and move on.”

‘I don’t think I can ever heal. It’ll never be over for me. I don’t see how you can call me beautifu l and strong, when I’m neither.’ I signed heatedly with tears coming out of my eyes. ‘Look at me right now. I never used to cry at the drop of a hat. I never used to hate getting up every morning looking in the mirror wishing I didn’t h ave to. I had actually just started being able to look in the mirror when James made me star t going into work with him.’

“See, that’s how I know you’re strong.” When I looked confused, he continued. “Here you are, scared to be out in the open around people, but you’re doing it every day. You can blame it on James, but we both know he could never make you do anything. You’d do anything for him, so he is your motivation, but it’s you getting out there trying to overcome this obstacle. Pea, everyone is afraid of something. That doesn’t matter. What matters is how you handle that fear. You might have been hiding, and still are to a certain extent, but then again , at least you are trying. You have to overcome your fear. Trust me there are a lot of things I had to overcome to survive what I had to do and see in the Rangers.”

‘What did you have to do over the re?’ I asked “I can’t and won’t go into details. But it was pretty much my team’s job to go in and do the rescues of POWs . When we’d get intelligence on where a camp was, we’d do surveillance, and then we’d go in and do what we needed to get them out.”

I could see the pain in his eyes as he was telling me about it. I don’t know what he went through, but I kind of knew how he felt. We had both been forced to do things we didn’t want to do. His was voluntary, but it still lef t the same marks on a person. ‘You don’t have to ever do it again do you?’

“Well, I was voluntarily discharged due to the injuries I received on the last mission, but the y can recall me if needed.” He saw the concern on my face and quickly added, “I’m all healed up now, it was nothing like what…” He trailed off.

‘Nothing like what? What happened to you?’ I asked.

“The last mission was a set up. We received bogus intel that led us into an ambush. The POWs that were supposedly there were actually the enemy. When we went in, everything was wired, and by the time we realized, we barely escaped the explosion alive. I did actually lose a member of my unit. I was infested with shrapnel in the back of my body, but I was still able to lead us out to the rendezvous point to get picked up.”

‘Can I see?’

He turned and lifted his shirt for me to be able to see his back . I gasped at the sight. He still had a pink scar about five inches long going vertically down his spine. The other thirty or so cuts were almost healed. I lightly traced his back with my fingers. When I traced the one on his spine, he lowered his shirt, turned back to face me, and spoke again.

“Most of it was superficial, but a larger piece was embedded in my spine. I was paralyzed from the waist down. The doctors removed it with surgery, but told me I might not recover. A week after the surgery, the swelling had gone down, and I was able to move my legs, so I started rehab. I’ve spent the last four months in a rehab center. Now here I am, and I’m alright.”

‘Will you be able to run the ranch and work with the horses again?’ I signed.

He gave that heart-stopping smile. “Of course. Can’t nothin’ keep me o f f a horse. You know that.” He drawled, suing an exaggerated southern accent.

‘Do you still have Larry, Curly, and Moe?’ I asked. Those were Toby’s, Tory’s, and Troy’s horses named after the three stooges. Their grandpa Tobias used to c all the trips the three stooges because of how they acted so when he gave them each a horse that’s what they named them. Grandpa Tobias got a real kick out of it.

‘Yep, we sure do. We still have Nosey, too .’ He laughed, referring to my horse. I had named her Nosey when she was born because she would always poke me with her nose when I came over. We got real attached, and they ended up giving her to me for my birthday that year.

We talked about the ranch a little longer, him telling me they were going to restock the breeding mares and stallions so they could start their breeding and training business again. They had sold off all of their horse stock when they extended their tour in the military. They had already decided to invest the money, let it grow with interest, and do a restock when they got out. The money would help them keep the business in the black and give them time to start the breeding.

After talking for another half an hour, we decided Toby would bunk at the house for the night, so we got up and headed home. Toby grabbed my hand again, (this time I didn’t flinch) and we set off down the path. When we hit the tree line, I saw something that stopped me in my tracks.

Toby turned to look at me when he felt that I was no longer following.

“Pea, what’s wrong?” He asked me

I had started shaking. I couldn’t breathe. There was no possible way for that to have been there. Oh, my God! I hit the pendant on my bracelet, and started to hyper ventilate.

“Come on, Pea, tell me what’s wrong.” Toby shook my shoulders trying to get me to respond.

“Marti!” He yelled. “What are you looking at?”

Jordan and James came running up. Not taking my eyes off of the object, I just pointed. I heard the intake of breath from my brothers. I knew they’d never leave that there. They knew what it represented.

A single thornless long stem red rose.

Chapter 5

I woke up in pain. It was dark in the room, and when I tried to sit up to see better, I realized I was still locked up in handcuffs. This time, though, I was lying in a bed. My legs were not tied, but they hurt too much from all the cuts from the whip he used. I couldn’t move. And I couldn’t scream because my throat hurt from screaming through the gag. I remembered that my body had finally numbed and I had lost my voice. He stopped after that, thinking my silence was me finally submitting to him. He took me down from the wall and cuffed me to the bed. After that is when I passed out. Now I felt sick to my stomach from the pain.

I heard the locks click, and my heart started racing in fear. He was back and I didn’t know what else he would do to me.

He walked in with a tray of food and wine. When he set it on the night stand, he bent over and kissed me while unlocking the handcuffs. He helped me sit up, and handed me a long stem rose. “Forgive me, please .” He said, looking like he genuinely sorry. “I got you a rose. I know it’s your favorite, and it looks perfect with your beautiful, flawless skin.”

My hands were shaking, but I was afraid of what he’d do if I didn’t accept it. When I took it a thorn pricked my thumb and I dropped the rose.

“I’m sorry, Pet. I should have removed the thorns. I wasn’t thinking.” He said in a loving tone. “I was just anxious to get breakfast to you. I made your favorite.’

I looked at the tray and saw a bowl of cheese grits and a glass of wine. I didn’t drink wine with breakfast, I didn’t know who did, but I thanked him anyway in a hoarse voice .

“Are you in pain?” He asked. Concern laced his voice.

No, ya think! But I couldn’t say that out loud or it would set him off. “Yes, Master.” I said instead, looking down at the mattress. He had taught me to always answer him with ‘yes’ or ‘no’ or full explanations, ending every statement or question with ‘master’. I was never to look him in the eyes, unless he commanded me to.

“Well, I brought you something for pain. It should help you sleep while you heal a little more, too .” He lifted my chin so he could look me in the eyes. I tried to school my expression so he wouldn’t see the mix of fear and hatred that I was sure was in them, but I think he saw any way, by the flash of anger that crossed his face before his caring mask came back up. “I’m sorry I had to be harsh, but you have to learn your role, Pet.”

“Yes, Master.” I said as I saw him take a needle I hadn’t noticed off the tray. “May I ask a question, Master.”

“Yes you may.” He answered, taking my arm and straightening it out, preparing to inject me with whatever was in the needle.

“Please, Master, what is in the needle?”

“It’s morphine, Pet. It’ll help you, but I want you to eat.” He said while injecting me with the medicine.

Tears were sliding down my cheeks. “Please, Master, I’m not hungry. I feel sick.”

That finally made him angry. “I made this food, so you’re going to EAT IT!” He was yelling by the time he was finished. He backhanded me. While I was trying to sit up again, feeling dizzy from what he gave me, he turned, picked up the food, and handed me the bowl. “Now EAT!”

I held the bowl in my left hand, which was already shaking, and picked up the spoon in my ri ght, but I couldn’t see straight. My head felt light and airy and like everything was in slow motion. I tried to eat but missed my mouth. Blain knocked the bowl out of my hand and I knew I was in trouble.

***********************************************************************

“Come on, Sis! Snap out of it! I won’t let him get you! Sis!” Jordan grabbed my face to where I had to look at him. “He’s not here, Sis. You have to breathe. Just look at me and take deep breaths.”

I did. I started trying to match Jordan’s breathing, and I finally noticed I was being held. Toby must have picke d me up at some point, but I had been to o lost in flashbacks to notice. I was crying so I wiped my eyes and tried to calm myself. I was safe. Jordan and Toby were there, and James was run ning up the path towards us, having gone back to get his 550 Beretta. He had bought it and trained on how to use it after the incident because he knew I wouldn’t touch a gun. Jordan had done the same, and I noticed his Sig Su a er SP2022 tucked in the front of his pants. I was safe. None of these men would let anything happen to me, but then I looked back down at the rose. What if they got hurt trying to protect me?

Toby started walking to the house, carrying me like I weighed nothing. He was rubbing my arm with the hand holding my upper body, and clutching my thigh with the one under my knees. I knew he was angry, even though he was whispering nonsense in my ear trying to calm me. I looked at him and mouthed how sorry I was . He couldn’t hear a sound, but he knew what I was saying.

“You have nothing to be sorry for, Pea.” He whispered softly in to my hair.

I just wrapped my arms around his neck and buried my face against him. He carried all the way back to the house, and straight to my room. He laid me down on the bed and took my shoes off. He then sat down taking his boots and socks off followed by his shirt. He lay down , on top of the covers, facing me.

“You need to get some sleep, Marti.”

I knew he was seriously worried when he called me by my name.

‘I don’t like sleeping. I alway s have nightmares when I sleep.’ I signed.

Toby put one hand on my hip, pulling me closer to him, and situated his other arm under my head as a pillow. We were close together, but I still had room to sign to him.

We heard a knock on the doorframe, (the door still being open) and saw Jordan, James, and Shelby standing there.

“Are you okay, Sissy?” James asked tentatively.

I nodded and motioned for them to come in. They all sat at different places on the bed, James and Shelby holding hands. I tried to sit up, but Toby tightened his arms around me to keep me still.

I sighed and signed, ‘I’m ok ay . I’m just scared of what he’s going to do. I don’t want anyone else to get hurt, and he will hurt or probably kil l anyone who keeps me from him.’

“He won’t come near us. We’ll stick together through this and keep you safe this time. I won’t let him take you again, Sis.” Jordan said fervently. “He’s done messed with the wrong family this time. It’s me who’ll kill him if I see him.”

“We will.” James said. “Like you said, J, we’re in this together. Sissy, will you please agree to have one of us with you at all times? I don’t think he’ll try anything with us around.”

‘I’ll probably just be staying here. I don’t think he can get in here with our security that J has pu t in . I can be safe here.’

“Come on, Pea. You can’t let him win.” Toby piped in. “If you shut yourself away, that’s what you’re doing, letting him win. You’re letting him still have power over you. I don’t know exactly what happened, but I do know you. You’ve always been strong. A real fighter. Fight him and his hold over you. Be who you’ve always been.”

‘I’m sorry, Toby. I don’t know how to be that person anymore.’

“Sure ya do, Sissy. You was beginning to come back. Just keep doin’ what we were doin’. Come to work with me every day and start getting out of the house. I want my Sissy back. We used to do everything together.” Then he looked at Toby. “At least when the trips weren’t around.”

“Hey!” Toby laughed.

I was silently laughing while Jordan butted into it. “Well when y’all were here on holidays, Marti forgot she had brothers. We only saw her at bed time, and sometimes not even then. She’d sleep over at your place.”

I couldn’t believe they were arguing over me. It was too funny, but I knew they were only trying to make me feel better. It worked though.

After a little light bantering back and forth, the others left leaving me with just Toby. I was still in his arms. I could tell he wanted to say something, but he was struggling to get it out.

‘Just say it.’ I signed.

He took a deep breath and let it out. “I don’t want you to get upset, and if you don’t want to talk about it I’ll understand, but I was wondering…”

I was looking him in the eyes. I knew he wanted to know everything, and we’d never kept things from each other, but it was just too difficult to talk about.

“Never mind.” He mumbled. I guess he could tell I didn’t want to talk about it, but I felt bad because he told me some of what happened to him.

‘Don’t worry about it. Go ahead and ask.’

“Well…I was just wondering why you freaked at the sight of the rose?”He said softly.

This time it was me who took the deep breath. I pushed back and he loosened his arms enough for me to be able to turn onto my back to where I was looking up at the ceiling instead of at him.

‘After the first punishment, he brought me breakfast in bed, an injection of pain meds, and a long stem rose as an apology for being so harsh. A thorn pricked my thumb when I took it from him, and he said he felt bad for forgetting the thorns, so every time he brought me a rose after that-which was after all the punishments-he w ould trim the thorns off first.’ I didn’t look at him the whole time I was signing to him. I w as afraid I’d see pity in his eyes . I had tears leaking from mine.

“What punishments?”

I shook my head very fast. I couldn’t tell him. I had flashes of the whip slashing my face and throat, and of the knife he eventually graduated to using. I couldn’t tell. I couldn’t. I kept shaking my head while sobbing harder and harder.

“I’m sorry, Pea. I’m so sorry. You don’t have to tell me. Calm down, baby, you’re safe ” He pulled me into his arms murmuring comforting words, holding me tight, and rocking me.

I eventually calmed down and pushed away from him again so I could use my hands.

‘When are Tory and Troy coming home?’ I asked.

It was his turn to look uncomfortable, but he said, “They are stateside.”

‘Well, if they’re back, when will they be coming home?’ I asked, confused.

“Troy will coming in a couple of days.”

He tried to pull me back, but I still wanted to know about Tory.

‘When will Tory be coming?’

There was pain in his eyes when he answered. “I don’t know.”

I knew something was wrong, and he didn’t want to tell me. I was starting to panic. ‘Wh y don’t you know? Where is he?’

Toby always prided himself on being “manly”, but as he lay there, I saw a tear trail down his temple. I knew whatever it was, it was bad.

“Tory’s in a coma.”

Chapter 6

My heart stopped for a beat. My Tory was hurt. I couldn’t believe it. He’d always been able to jump out of trees or off the barn and not have a scratch. He couldn’t be in a coma!

I looked at Toby, my heart breaking. “How? Why?” I asked.

“He took multiple gunshots to the back and one hit him in the head.” He said quietly. “They really don’t understand how he is still alive, but he is. He has brain function and everything, but if he doesn’t wake soon, they’ll have to hook him up to machines because his organs will stop functioning correctly.”

“Where is he?”

“He’s in Columbia at the VA Hospital there. Troy is with him. He’ll come home this next weekend and I’ll go there. We don’t want to leave him alone.”

I got up off of the bed and went to the bathroom to wash my face. I needed to see Tory for myself. I hadn’t seen him for three years, because he didn’t come when Troy and Toby did before my incident. He had been deployed on a mission for the Navy Seals he was a part of. The last time he came home, a little over a year ago, I had gotten Jordan to tell him that I was out of town. I of course was ‘never home’ for their calls because I didn’t want them to know what happened. Now I might have missed my chance to ever talk to him again, and I didn’t think I could live with that. Thoughts of my gu ys have gotten me through some of the most painful things that have gone on . To never have Tory call me Princess again, or to never ride double with him on Curly again, or to never make anymore memories with him again was too much to bear.

I remember that he was my first kiss. He said he needed practice so he’d be good enough for the girl he was going to marry. I knew that was a load of bull, but I did it anyway . He didn’t need any practice. It was the most amazing first kiss. He was the first one to always run up to me for a hug when they would come for the holidays. He was the one to talk all of us into the crazy stunts we would get in trouble for. Like t .p .’ing the high school principal ’s house for canceling the winter formal my freshman year, or keying the neighbors car for making me get rid of my bulldog, Wrinkles, when Wrinkles got into her flowerbed. They never let me get in trouble, though. They always took the blame for everything, and everyone thought I was an angel. No matter what I said, the trip s wouldn’t have it any other way.

No, I couldn’t live without one of my guys. I had to see him, but that would me an traveling and I was afraid to do that. What if…

I turned to go back to Toby, and jumped, falling down almost hitting the floor if Toby hadn’t caught me. He had been standing in the doorway watching me.

“You still are falling for me, huh?” He gave a little smirk, but it didn’t reach his eyes. I could tell he was just trying to lighten the mood a little, but it didn’t work. I was too preoccupied with my idea.

‘Toby, Can we bring him home?’ My hands were moving fast in excitement of the idea. I looked at him with a hopeful expression on my face, but the question put a pained look in his eyes.

“Did you not hear me, Pea? He might not be on machines now, but he does have IV fluids, and he will end up on machines if he doesn’t wake up.” He said trying to stress to me the severity of the situation, but that just made me angry.

‘I’m not stupid, so don’t treat me that way. I will pay for whatever…’

“No!” He cut me off. “You’ll not spend your money on his treatment that, right now, he’s getting for free at the VA.”

‘I have money that I don’t need or use. It has just sat in the bank collecting dust for the past three years.’ I signed using jerky hand movements. ‘I want to do this. I want Tory here with me. I want you all here. Don’t you think he’d do better in his own home? He’s hated hospitals every since he had to watch your mom suffer through her treatments.’ I looked at him pleading with my eyes. ‘Please.’

Toby walked away from me to the window and asked while his back was still turned, “Will you be alright if I go home tonight and make arrangements?”

I waited for him to turn back to me so I could answer, but he just stayed looking out. Did he forget I couldn’t answer? I guess he did forget as he turned, and a look of dawning came on his face.

“I’m such an idiot! I forgot. What was your answer?”

‘I’ll be fine. I’ll just work on my book some. I’ll get Jordan to call the bank tomorrow to add you on my accounts so you can pay for everything he needs to be transferred here .’

“You don’t have to do that.” He said as we walked towards the front door. “We have money in the bank I will use.”

I grabbed his arm to turn him toward me. ‘That is for your ranch. When Tory wakes don’t you think he wants all of you to continue as planned? My money has nothing to do. All my things are paid off, and Jordan pays the monthlies so I don’t even have to worry about bills, except for groceries. Please let me do this for him.’

Toby huffed out a big breath of air. “Alright,” He said. “Talk to Jordan and l et him arrange things on your end. It’s too late to start transferring over here tonight, so I’ll just call Troy to let him know.”

‘Please, don’t tell him about me. I’ll see him as soon as he gets home. Let h im concentrate on Tory for now.’

“You know I’m not going to promise that.” He said as he opened the door. “But, I won’t tell him the specifics of the little I know. I’m still very disappointed that neither you nor your brothers told us what you were going through. We would have been here sooner. We’ve always been there for you, yet you shut us out of something like this. I won’t shut my brothers out.”

‘I am sorry. I thought I was doing what was best for ever y body, but I g uess I was just being selfish.’

He kissed me, just a peck on the mouth, but something I had missed terribly. “No, Pea. I guess I kind of understand where you were coming from, but it doesn’t make it hurt any less. One thing you’ll never be, though, is selfish. I’ll see you in the morning.”

I watched as he walked down the porch steps, and out to his SUV, with so many mixed feelings that I was confused. I was happy to finally be getting my best friends and th e loves of my life home with me. I was petrified that Tory wouldn’t wake up . I was sad for how many things had c hanged between all of us, but that was my fault. I watched him pull away and then closed, locked, and dead-bolted the door.

I wanted to find Jordan and talk to him, but looking at the clock it was already one thirty in the morning, so I‘d have to wait for him to wake up. I was starting to feel groggy, so I went to my bathroom to find my No-Doze. I took four pills because the normal dosage didn’t work for me anymore. Four pills were barely working. I headed back to the kitchen and got a Red Bull out of the fridge.

I tried to work on my book for an hour, but had barely come out with a page, so I just put my laptop to the side and just sat by the window in my bedroom . I didn’t open the drapes; I just stared like I could see the outside world. For some reason, every since Toby told me about Tory, I couldn’t help thinking of my dad.

I was always a Daddy’s girl. Even after he started working all the time, when he was home we always spent the time together. I took care of him , doing his laundry, cooking for him, cleaning after him, stuff like that. I guess that’s why I felt betrayed when he died. He never told me he had liver cancer. I had noticed how tired he was, but when I asked he would just laugh it off saying he was getting old. I tried hard to get him to quit one of his jobs, I even started working two jobs because I thought we needed the money, but he would not quit and would not let me pay for anything but groceries. He had kept a lot of things hidden from me. It nearly broke me when he died. I felt like I didn’t have a purpose anymore. My brothers were living in their own places, doing their own things, the trips all had decided to extend their service in the military. I was alone and I didn’t know how to deal with it. At one point I had even thought about ending it all, but then I thought about Daddy and how, even though he hat ed living without my mom, he had done it. He didn’t end it all when she died. He actually made his life better trying to make her proud of him. He wanted to be considered good enough to be able to join her when it was his time to go. I decided then to do the same. I would make my mom and dad proud. That’s when I signed up for the University. Of course that ended up being the mistake of a lifetime, literally.

I went to the kitchen to grab another Red Bull and sat at the breakfast nook. I didn’t realize I was crying until Jordan had come in for breakfast.

“Hey, Sis. Do you need me to help with breakfast?” He asked, but as soon as he saw my face, he came, sat beside me, and pulled me into a hug. “Are you ok ay ?”

I nodded and signed. ‘Yes. I was just thinking about Daddy.’

“Want to talk about it?” He said as he got up to put a pot of coffee on.

I got up to get breakfast on, he would burn water if he tried, and just waited to finish breakfast before I could really get into a conversation with him. That’s one of the things I hate the most , having to put off conversations. It’s so inconvenient when you can only talk to people when they are looking at you, which is why Jordan made me the voice keyboard. That thought gave me an idea.

By the time breakfast was done, James and Shelby had joined us.

“About Dad…” Jordan said looking at me, trying to continue the conversation that was started before I was cooking.

‘Hearing about Tory just got me thinking about Dad. I don’t want to go through that again. No more death. I’m goi ng to help as much as possible.’ I told him.

“Will you really travel all that way to see him?” James asked.

I shook my head. ‘I’m having Toby transfer him here so he’ll be with all of his family and friends in familiar surroundings. I’m hoping he’ll wake up then.’

James looked at Jordan, both with confused looks on their face. “But, there’s not a VA Hospital around here or they would have already brought him.” Jordan said.

‘I’m paying to have him brought to his house. He’ll have home care there.’

“Toby’s letting you pay for this?” Jordan said disbelieving.

‘I gave some very good arguments for it and he finally conceded. I think he really wants him here as much as I do. Can you add all three trips to my main account, J? That way Toby and Troy have the access t he y need and do n’t have to go through one of us each time.’

“I don’t know if that’s a good idea, Sissy. Home healthcare is very expensive. And do you really want so many people to have access to your account? Things can get confused. I don’t want you to lose everything.” James voiced his concern.

I got angry at that. ‘Do you really th ink that they’d take advantage?’ I signed heatedly. ‘You’ve known them as long as I have. Do y ou really think they’d do that? To me of all people?’

“I didn’t mean it that way, Sissy. I know they wouldn’t just take from you. What I meant was that with so many different people, there will be different charges everywhere. If you don’t get all invoices and receipts, it can mess up your account.”

I slapped the table hard enough to sting my hand. Did he really think I was stupid? I was furious at this point.

‘I went to school for my business degree with a minor in accounting. I may have not finished it all, but I know enough. I’m good at it and I did it for you and Jordan. I will get my degree eventually, but I think I know enough to be able to handle my own finances.’ I stood up and stomped to my bedroom, slamming the door.

I was pacing back and forth, fuming. I know my brothers love me, but they treat me like a kid on important stuff like this. I’m eleven months older than James, how dare he treat me like I’m stupid. We were always in the same grade in school because my birthday was past the cut off for the start of school, so I had to wait a year and go with him. It never bothered me. We did everything together anyway , but we always made the same grades.

There was a knock at the door before it opened for Jordan’s head to stick through. “Can I come in?” He asked.

I nodded and sat down, and he came and sat on my bed beside me. “You know he didn’t mean anything by that, don’t you?”

‘That’s what makes it so bad, J. Both of you make comments like that, not really thinking about what it means that you think you need to ask questions like that . Maybe it’s sub-consciously, but you both obvious ly think I can’t handle myself.’

He thought about it for a minute and looked down, realizing I was right.

“I’m sorry; I’ve never really seen it like that. I see what you’re saying, and I promise to try to do better. I’m sure James will too, if you talk to him about it.”

‘I will. I’m sorry I blew up, and I’ll go apologize to James too, but can I ask y ou to work on something for me?’ I asked.

“You know I’ll do whatever I can for you. No need to ask, just tell me.”

‘Do you have anything that has a recording of my voice on it you could mimic? I was going to see if you could make the voice of my keyboard sound like mine used to .’ I signed, thinking of the idea I had earlier.

“As a matter of fact, I do. I was looking at some of our home videos a couple of days ago. I’m sure I could copy it off of that.” He tilted his head to the side, trying to figure me out without having to ask, but was unable to. A smile spread on my face, knowing he wouldn’t be able to let the question go. He sighed, letting curiosity get the better of him. “You know what I’m going to ask.”

‘I was trying to see if you could let it go with not knowing the reason.’ I signed, laughing silently. ‘I want Tory to be able to hear my voice while he’s in a coma. I’m hoping that between me and his brothers, we’ll be able to bring him out of it.’

Jordan nodded his head in understanding, got up, and held his hand out to help me up from the bed. I got up and followed him back into the kitchen to make peace with James. I love my brothers too much to hold grudges. Life is definitely too short.

Chapter 7

It was just before lunchtime the same day, and Toby had made his way back over to my house. We , along with Jordan, were making a list of supplies, equipment, and furniture needed to bring Tory home. Toby had been watching me closely and I was getting uncomfortable with him staring at me.

“You look worn out, Pea. Why don’t you go get some rest while we get this organized?” He said. “Troy will be coming in on the two o’clock flight, and I’ll be heading out. I’ll come back with Tory when he’s ready for transfer.”

‘No, I don’t sleep unless I can’t help it, and I want to be with you until you leave.’ I signed. I knew I didn’t really explain to him my need to stay awake, so I knew the questions and lecture would be coming.

He must have seen some kind of expression on my face because he laughed and took my hand in his. “No, I’m not going to lecture you, but we will be talking as soon as Jordan and I get done ordering the deliveries for this stuff.” He then let go of my hand and pulled up the list of local medical supply marts to call to start the ordering.

I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding. I trusted Toby, that wasn’t the problem. The problem was that I was ashamed. If I had waited for my boys to get home before I started dating, I would have had some back up here , and none of the bad things would have happened . I would never be able to date any of them because I couldn’t choose between them. I loved them each for different reasons, and I knew that they loved me too, but I would never want to come between them.

With Jordan on his laptop and Toby on the phone, I didn’t want to disturb them, so I typed on the keyboard that I was going for a walk. I knew Toby would come find me when he got done.

I headed to the fridge first to get a Red Bull, and then I headed out the kitchen door to the back deck. I was so tired. I hadn’t really slept for four days, and I knew I was about to crash. I gulped down the energy drink, made sure my phone was in my back pocket, and started walking. I made it to the creek in no time, but I knew if I stopped, I would fall out, and I didn’t want that. I texted Toby and Jordan to let them know I was going to the loft on the ranch. I wanted to be alone for a while, and if I was going to dream, I didn’t want them to see me. James had told me I scared him when I slept because it was like I was living through it again and he couldn’t wake me up. I didn’t want anyone to witness my humiliation.

I got to the old barn where the boys stored the old equipment they didn’t use anymore. They had redone the hay loft into a game room with both an overstuffed couch and a chair. We used to hang out here on rainy days and play air hockey or shoot pool once they showed me how to play . I went over to the couch and lay down, finally giving in to the fatigue. I was asleep as soon as my head hit the cushion.

***********************************************************************

I was sneaking around trying to find my way outside. This place was a maze. I was in an old house where everything in it was thick with dust and mold. The smell alone was making me sick. I went down hallway after hallway and still no door leading outside. I went in one of the rooms to see if I could climb out of the window, but when I looked, I was about two stories up. “Damn.” I whispered. This had to be a mansion. I left the room, being as quiet as I could. I didn’t want Blain to wake up. He had unlocked my chains today telling me my training was over. He bragged about how he’d “told ” me how perfect we were together and proved he had been right . He still wouldn’t let me leave the ‘play room’, but he brought up a steak dinner and left me loose during the night.

As soon as he’d told me he trusted me without the chains, I started planning this. I’d asked for some pain relievers and instead of the injection, he gave me two tablets. I thought I had made a mistake in asking for that because I fell asleep soon afterward. I woke up and Blain was spooned up against my back naked. I waited, being as relaxed and still as I could, and finally he turned onto his back, leaving me free to get up. My body, with all its cuts and bruises, was still hurting, but not as bad as it was before. If I just could get out, I could get to the hospital and let them call the police.

As I was making my way down the stairs I had come upon, I heard a creaking noise behind me. Before I was able to look back, I felt hands push me. The staircase turned, luckily, or I would have gone all the way down, but I still hurt too bad to move. My head was spinning. When I looked up, Blain was coming. He picked me up, and I could see how furious he was by the crazy glint in his eyes.

“Looks like the training isn’t finished.” He sounded happy. I was really scared. He was going to kill me. I couldn’t take much more of this.

He took me back to the play room, stripped me bare, and strapped me onto the St. Andrews cross, facing the wall.

“Now, Pet, what did you do wrong?” He asked me softly.

I was still reeling from the fall, and didn’t register that he’d asked a question until he hit me, using a wooden paddle, with all his might. He hit me twice on my butt, and then he moved down to my legs. It felt like he would break them. He was probably trying to make where I couldn’t walk.

“Now, I’ll ask only once more. What are you being punished for?”

I was having trouble breathing, and my throat was hurting from screaming, but I tried to answer anyway. “I…got up…w-without…permission.”

“THAT…WAS…NOT…ALL!” He shouted, hitting me with each word. On the last word, the paddle broke, scraping me with the broken end.

I heard him pacing behind me, taking deep breaths to try to calm down. “What else did you do, Pet.” He asked softly, his voice back to normal.

I didn’t know if it would be better to admit to trying to leave, or to lie. I was betting on the latter. Maybe if I stuck to the lie, he’d start to doubt himself.

“I-I w-was trying t-to get my own f-food. I-I w-was hungry.” I stuttered in my scratchy voice.

He didn’t say anything. I heard him move off, probably to armoire that held all of his toys. “Really,” He said. “Because I was following you.”

My heart stopped. I knew this was going to be bad.

“I had trusted you, but I knew you didn’t know your way around, so I followed.” I heard him getting closer, and I wondered what he’d picked from the toys. “I thought it was funny, and I was going to step up and help, until I saw you go to the window.” He continued. “When you swore at the sight, I realized you were trying to leave. I still gave you the benefit of the doubt. I followed until you passed the kitchenette and started down the stairs.” He came to stand beside me so I could see him. I saw the flogger in his hand and started crying . “Now, I am sorry for being childish and pushing you, but I was just devastated that you would try to leave me.” He brushed the hair off my cheek, and placed it behind my ear ; being so tender. “I might have done something I shouldn’t have with that, but that doesn’t change your punishment. You have to learn to obey me in all things, Pet. That is the only thing that will keep you safe.”

I wondered who would keep me safe from him as he started whipping me with the flogger.

“Pea!” I heard in my dream as I felt my skin tear again and again.

“Marti! Come on Pea, wake up!” I heard again, and I shot up, falling from the couch, only to be caught by Toby. I jerked away from him and backed into the corner of the room, sobbing soundlessly .

He came to me slowly, as to not scare me, and got down on his knees to be on my level on floor. He slowly pulled me into his arms to where I was sitting on his lap. I could feel how tense he was, and felt him kiss my hair.

“My God, Baby. What did that bastard do to you?” I heard him whisper in a choked voice.

Chapter 8

We sat like that for a while. Toby had me in his arms. I was in a position to where I was straddling him; my head laying on his collar bone. Even sitting he was so much bigger than me. He had always been able to make me feel safe. He was running one of his hands through my hair as the other one rubbed up and down my back. By now I had completely calmed down. I think he realized I didn’t feel like talking about it because he didn’t ask for any explanations. That was one of the things I loved about him, He had always just quietly been there when I needed him. He never did ask me to talk; he just waited for me to open up to him when I was ready. I was looking forward to seeing Troy, but I knew he was always the hot-head. He wouldn’t l et anything go until he knew who to beat up or in this case probably kill. He’s the one that won’t be happy until he knew the whole story of what happened.

I pushed away from him so he could see me. ‘What time is it?’

“It’s one o’clock.” He said looking at his watch. “I guess I should go meet him there. I’ll be heading out as soon as he gets here. Will you go with me to greet him and say goodbye to me before I take off ?”

‘Which airport?’ I asked.

“A friend of ours runs a security company in Charlotte. He’s letting us use his company Cessna.” He told me. “We’ll be coming in and departing from the small airport in Rock Hill, so you won’t have to worry about cro wds or being in the city. We’ll keep you safe.”

I just nodded. ‘I’ll go get ready and tell Jordan. You c an pick me up when you’re ready’ I signed.

“I brought everything when I came this morning, so I’ll walk back with you.” He got up with me in his arms and set me down. He kept his hands on my hips and looked into my eyes. I could see the concern written all over his face. He gave me a kiss and then said, “Please don’t take this the wrong way. I know you are capable of taking care of yourself, but with what you saw the other night, I would feel better if you didn’t walk in the woods alone anymore.”

I thought about this for a minute, and realized he was right. I wasn’t thinking earlier, or I wouldn’t have. I was just too tired to think straight. I nodded my head again and did my finger in the ok motion.

He helped me down from the loft and we headed back to my house.

*********************************************************************

It only took a fifteen minute drive to get to the airport in Rock Hill. When we pulled up, I noticed about ten cars in the parking lot. That didn’t seem like too many people, but it still made me nervous. I was very self-conscience about the scars all over my body. Even if I was fully covered, like now with my jeans, LSU sweatshirt, and my Timberlands, I still felt like everyone was watching me. My neck and face w ere still uncovered; I felt hideous. When we got out, Toby took my and walked closely beside me. I looked down the whole time, so no one could see my face, but I was looking out the corner of my eyes, trying to see who was around. I felt like I wa s being followed and watched; m ore so than my normal paranoia. I looked around, only noticing a couple of people milling around outside of the few workers. Then I saw a flash of red hair going into the men’s room.

I stopped dead in my tracks, jerking Toby to a stop as well. My breathing was speeding up to the point of hyperventilation.

Toby stepped in front of me grabbing my shoulders. “Breath with me.” He said. “Come on, Pea, calm down and tell me what’s wrong.”

Maybe I had just imagined it. Even if he was following me, he wouldn’t have had time to get in here, would he?

Toby put his hand on my cheek to guide my face up to him, so I was looking into his eyes.

“What happened, Marti? You were doing fine.”

I shook my head and signed, ‘It was just a panic attack. I’m ok ay now.’

He just looked at me for a moment before he nodded. I could tell he really didn’t believe me, but he dropped it, put his arm around my neck where his forearm and hand were hanging off my shoulder, and we headed towards the door to airfield where Troy would enter. There was a little waiting area, but I pulled Toby out the door so I would be able to see Troy get off the plane.

“There’s the plane now.” He said, squeezing my neck. “He’ll be out in a second. He has to wait for the engine to die down.”

I held my breath for a minute in anticipation, when finally the pilot finally opened the door. As soon as I saw him, I couldn’t contain myself. I ran to him. When he saw me, he dropped his bags and ran to meet me in the middle. He grabbed me up around the thighs and picked me up as I put my arms around his neck. I was laughing and crying at the same time, but of course he couldn’t tell that since I was silent . I didn’t know what all Toby told him when he called last night, so I didn’t know if he knew I was mute or not.

He set me down, put his hands on each side of my face, and gave me a big kiss. “God, I’ve missed y…” He stopped when he got a good look at my face. I immediately looked down so he couldn’t see, but he wasn’t having that. He lifted my chin to see my face more clearly, and then he looked down to my neck. He got a hard look in his eyes, and I knew he was angry. He looked back to Toby. I couldn’t see what Toby did, but Troy tried to calm himself down. He finally smiled at me and said sincerely how good I looked. I started crying and buried my face in his chest right underneath his chin. I knew he meant it was good I was alive.

We made our way inside after retrieving Troy’s bags. He told us that there was no change in Tory’s condition , but they were getting ready for the transport in three days. Toby said that everything should be set up and ready at their house, and started getting his bags together to be able to leave. The plane had had time to refuel and the pilot informed us that he was ready when Toby was.

We all walked back out the terminal door, but after a man hug, Troy hung back.

“I’ll only be gone a few days, but I’ll miss you, Pea.” He said as we walked closer to the plane. He turned to me after giving his bags to the pilot and said, “I love you, Marti. I won’t ever be willing to leaving you again, after this.”

A tear escaped my eye and rolled down my cheek. ‘I love you too, Toby. I love all of you.’ I signed and looked down. He probably thought I was a slut for that .

He lifted my chin. “You have got to quit looking down like you’re ashamed of everything, Pea. There’s nothing to be ashamed of. You are beautiful.” He kissed me again. “We all know you love us, just as all of us love you. When we get Tory back up and around, we will all sit down and have a serious talk, ok?”

I nodded, Got up to my tip-toes, and gave him a kiss. It surprised him because I had never initiated a kiss before. I had always felt like I was betraying one of them to do that, but since it was finally said, and he seemed to accept it, I couldn’t help myself.

“See ya!” He said as he walked up the steps to the plane. As the pilot closed the door, I walked back over to where Troy was, and grabbed his hand. He squeezed back as we watched the plane taxi down the runway and take off.

On the way out, I couldn’t help myself, I looked around as I had on the way in, just to see if I caught sight of the red hair again, but I didn’t.

Once we were in the car, Troy leaned over to kiss me again. “You know I want to know what the hell happened to you. Toby wants me to wait until you’re ready to tell us about it, but if there is any chance this bastard is still harassing you, I’m gonna take care of it. You are not alone anymore, you need to lean on us like you used to.”

‘Toby said you know ASL?’ I signed.

“Yeah, our uncle was deaf, so we learned it for him.” He answered.

I nodded. ‘Good. I have a keyboard Jordan made for me that speaks anything I type, but he’s making some adjustments to it , so this is my only f orm of communication right now.’

He sighed. “Alright, that’s fine, but I still want you to tell me about him and what happened to you.”

‘I’ll tell you some of it when we get home, but I stil l can’t talk about the details.’ I signed. ‘Please don’t force me to.’

“I won’t, Cupcake, but I do want a name.”

Chapter 9

Troy drove us back to my house. When we got there, Jordan and James came out to greet him and see how I was holding up. We went inside and the guys all grabbed beers and sat in the den to catch up. I just listened to them all laughing about different things, and it really lifted my spirits, but all of a sudden I had a flashback to the man with the red hair.

I knew there were millions of red-headed men in this country, but it was just the feeling I had when I saw him. Even before I saw him, it had felt like I was being followed. I knew if he ever caught me again, I’d not make it back alive.

I had to get my mind off of Blain or I end up making myself sick, so I thought about the trips. Just thinking about them always made me feel bet ter. I had to have faith that Tory would wake up soon. Maybe it was cliché, but I was hoping that hearing my voice would bring him back. I knew the reality though. If his brothers talking to him didn’t do it, then what made me think I could?

I wanted to stay at their house once the transfer was done. That way I could cook for the boys, and I’d be there if Tory woke up. No, not if…WHEN. When he woke up I wanted to be right beside him. I truly believed that nothing would ever keep these boys down.

But, who would cook for my brothers? If Toby and Troy agree to me staying there, then I’d just have to have them over for meals. I knew we could work it out.

Toby said they all loved me, but was it the same as what I felt, or was it more just the best friends that we’ve always been? They both did kiss me. There was no tongue involved, just lip to lip, so could I be reading more into it just because of how I feel? If that was the case, why would Toby say we would have a serious talk when Tory woke up?

“You still with us, Cupcake?”

I looked over and all of them were watching me with concern on their faces.

“You zoned out for a few, Sissy.” James said.

I sighed. ‘Sorry, just thinking.’

“About what?” Troy asked.

‘Different things.’

“Like what?” Troy asked again. He always was the most annoying of the three trips. He always had to know everything.

I huffed out a breath. ‘Just stuff.’ I signed then I got up and went to the kitchen to see what I could cook for supper.

He got up and followed me in there. I heard James whisper to Jordan something about almost being glad he wouldn’t have to hear my screaming. I thought that was a bit insensitive, but I guessed I could understand it. Troy and I used to get into so me pretty loud shouting matches, but we’d always end up forgetting what we were shouting about . By the end we’d both be laughing. We were just too much alike. Both of being strong willed and hard headed.

“You still need to tell me everything.” He said, sitting on a stool at the island in the kitchen.

I finished taking out the stuff to make chicken alfredo and put it on the counter before I turned to him. ‘I’m sorry, but my hands will be tied for a while, so I won’t be able to talk to you .’ I smirked when I saw how red his face was getting. I bet steam would’ve come out of his ears if we were cartoons. “You’re not going to get out of this, Marti.”

Shit! I thought. He only used my name when he was seriously angry. I knew I needed to try to calm him down. I took a deep breath and let it out. ‘Look,’ I signed. ‘I told you that I would, please just be patient. I would like to have a good evening with you and my brothers to welcome you home. Can we please do that? I promi se I’ll tell you about it later’

He let out a huge breath and said, “Sorry, Cupcake. I just wish that there was something for me to be able to do, and I won’t be able to do anything until I know what happened, and who hurt you.”

My eyes started to tear up like they normally did when I thought about it. I turned so he wouldn’t see. A minute later , I felt his arms come around my waist.

“I’m sorry. I can’t imagine how hard everything has been for you.” He whispered as he kissed the top of my head.

I wiped my eyes and turned back to him. ‘So, tell me about being a Green Beret. What did you do?’ I signed.

“Well, I specialized in surveillance.” He said as he sat back down on the stool. I went back to the counter to prep the food, while I listened to him describe what he did. I could tell he loved it. “My team worked the special reconnaissance missions. We had to go in undetected. I won’t go into detail of the things we did, but I liked it. You could say I fulfilled my ambition of being a super-secret spy.”

I turned to him and huffed out a silent laugh. He had always said he was going to be a spy when he got older. What had made that funny is that, at the time, he couldn’t sneak up on a deaf person without getting caught. He had had no stealth and was usually the reason we four got caught d oing the things we did . Like I said before though, they never let me take the fall with them.

“Yeah, I know. They trained me up right nice though. I bet I could sneak up on you and watch you for hours without you knowing, now.” That sent a chill down my spine. Not because he scared me, but because that’s what I thought Blain was doing to me. I always felt like he was watching me. Luckily, Troy didn’t notice my reaction and continued. “The Berets aren’t spies, technically, but what we did was basically the same thing. I’ve been stateside for a while now, though. I had gotten injured and came back to recuperate, but before I could come here, Toby got injured and had to go through his rehab. Damn if he didn’t get better and we find out about Tory. I think it was fate telling us it was time to come home, and now I can see why. If we can just get Tory to wake up…”

I turned to him, wiping my hands on a dish cloth and then signed, ‘I told Toby, and I’ll tell you that once he gets home, he’ll get better. Toby said he still has his brain function. That tells me that he’s just waiting for something. Maybe he just needs to stay asleep long enough for his body to heal up, I don’t know, but I have a feeling that once he gets home, he’ll wake up. I have fa ith in him. He won’t leave us.’

“You are an amazing woman, you know that?” I looked down, blushed, and then turned back to the pasta I was making. “You truly are. It’s like you ’re ‘the glass is half full’ type person, even with everything going on. I wish I could be more like you, sometimes.”

I finished cooking and we decided to pop a movie in and eat in the den. We ended up having a ‘Dusk Til Dawn’ movie marathon, though I wasn’t really into them after the first one. If it didn’t have George Clooney in it, I didn’t care about it, but I watched anyway.

I went to the kitchen during the second movie to take my pills and get some Red Bull to be able to stay awake. Troy came in as I was doing this, and questioned me about it in sign language so my brothers would not hear.

‘I don’t like to sleep.’ I explained for what felt like the millionth time. ‘I have nightmares every time I close my eyes, so I stay awake as long as possible.’

“Don’t you think that just wears you out to the point that it’s harder for you to wake up when you do have a nightmare? And did you think that maybe the nightmares would decrease if you slept more often?” He sighed. “I don’t mean to lecture, but it’s probably your fear of sleep making you have the dreams in the first place.”

‘How would you know? You can’t imagine what I go through every time I just close my eyes. It’s been almost two years, but when I close my eyes, it seems like it just happened. When I actually sleep, I can feel everything he did, all the pain is fresh, and it takes a few minut es after waking for it to fade.’

“I do know, Cupcake. I went through it after my injury until I had some counseling .” He answered back.

‘What happened to you?’ I asked.

“We were checking out a village that another team had just cleared of guerrillas. It was cleared from what we gathered, but we weren’t to have any interaction with the locals. A boy, who couldn’t have been older than fourteen, caught sight of us and thought we were part of the guerrilla group that had been there. He had a gun and opened fire on us. I was the only one hit. He g ot me in the side of the head; if he’d been a better shot, I’d have been dead.” He shook his head of the memory and took a deep breath. “Anyway, when I woke up I had problem with my sight. I have no peripheral vision, and I get shaky when I’ve been too active. I got an honorable discharge due to my injuries, so I won’t be going back.”

‘I wish I’d been there for all of you.’ I looked down. So many things could have been avoided if I just waited on them, and had been there for them when they called or came home on leave. They probably thought I had left them. In a way, I did. I had given up on them after my dad died. I looked back up to him and knew I owed it to him to tell him the truth. ‘After you all took the extended tour, when you had the option of quitting and coming home, I thought that you didn’t care for me anymore. I had just lost Daddy, and I was so lonely. I started school, but didn’t really socialize that much. I joined an online book readers club just to have someone to talk to . I figured that I didn’t really know them, and we were just talking about book s we’d read or wanted to read. That’s where I met Blain Robinson. We chatted back and forth, just about books at first, but then somehow we started telling about our lives. He said he’s just lost his brother in a drunk driving accident, and had turned to books as an escape. After about six months of chatting online, and speaking on the phone, I finally agreed to meet him. It was good at first, but he started trying to rush it. He was trying to talk me into the S &M lifestyle, but I knew that wasn’t for me, so I politely refused him. After a couple of time s of him trying to get me to do more than I was willing, I told him if he couldn’t wait then he’d have to find someone else, that I wasn’t ready for th at. He apologized and said he’d wait for as long as I needed to, but then, on the next date we had, he kidnapped me. He said he was a seasoned Master and knew what was best for me.’ By this point, I had tears coming down my face, and my hands were shaking.

Troy took me in his arms, hugging me tightly. After I had calmed down some, he asked, “How’d you get away?” He must have realized that the time Blain had me was the details I couldn’t talk about.

‘After the last time he lost control, which is when this happened to my face and neck, he unchained me a s I was out of it, and he left.’ I stared at a point on the other side of the kitchen, not being able to meet his eyes. ‘He had given me morphine for the pain, so I was able to walk to some degree. It took a while because I was still moving slowly, but I was able to make my way out of the house. When I made it to the street, I collapsed. I woke in the hospital after two days with both Jordan and James with me. They had been searching for me and had the police involved. I ended up writing a statement to the police of the whole thing. They told me later that Blain Robinson didn’t exist. The house I’d been held at was an estate house, the owners having had died, it just hadn’t been sold at that point. They never found the person who I knew as Blain.’

“And now you think he’s back?”

I nodded. ‘I know he is.’ I grabbed his hand and took him to my room. I got out copies of the letters he’d sent; the police had the real copies. I didn’t have to look. I had them all memorized, especially the last one from two weeks ago .

You will lose everyone you love.

If I can’t have you, then no one will.

Blain

Chapter 10

Troy had suggested exorcising our horses this morning to help get my mind off everything else. I think it was more to help him. He just about lost it last night when I had shown him the letters. I should have guessed what his reaction would be, but I hadn’t thought about it before I showed him. He calmed down as soon as I started to hyperventilate. I had started panicking when Troy was yelling at Ja m es and Jordan about what needed to be done. My panic attack wasn’t really Troy’s fault , i t happened any time I heard yelling, but he still felt really bad about it. We had spent the night in the den watching TV. Well, I did. Troy had fallen asleep.

I was saddling Nosey up for a ride, while Troy got Moe ready. We were working in silence, but it wasn’t an uncomfortable silence. I was actually enjoying being with someone who didn’t feel the need to talk just to fill the silence, l ike Jordan and James normally did . They always felt the need to talk when they were around me. Usually it was about nothing, like they just felt the need to make up for me not being able to talk. Between the three of us, I had always been the most talkative. They would just listen to my rambling most of the time, so since they suffered through me back then, I did it gladly for them now .

When the horses were ready, we led them out of the stables. I stood there for a minute, just listening to the sound of nature around us. It was just the two of us. Troy had called ahead and given the hands the day off so I’d feel more relaxed and not have to deal with being around people I wasn’t familiar with.

Troy came to me to help me up on Nosey’s back. “Where to, Cupcake?” He asked.

I thought about it for a minute. I had packed a picnic lunch for us, but we wouldn’t need that for a couple of hours. ‘Let’s just ride your land and take the trails, se e what changes there have been.’ I answered. ‘It’s been a long time since I’ve been here. Then we can have lunch b y your side of the creek later.’

“Sounds good.”

We rode all through his land and mine. We found a camp someone had set up not too far from my land, but it was on the part that was the town preserve. Fort Mill had gone through a couple of expansions, and a lot of land had been cleared for housing developments, strip malls, and schools, so the Town Council had set aside a bunch of woodland to be able to preserve the trees and wildlife of the area . No one was supposed to camp here, but it happened all the time. Nobody was at the camp when we passed, so we just moved on. We ended up going back to the creek around one o’clock.

After we let the horses drink from the creek for a while, we unloaded the saddles and tied them with enough slack to be able to graze in a nearby clearing. We went back to the creek to splash around and cool of f a little before going to set up the picnic. We sat side by side while we ate, and then when we were finished, Troy loaded everything back into the basket. We ended up sitting cross legged, facing each other with our knees touching. Troy leaned down to me and kissed me.

“This is what I’ve missed so much for so long,” He said as he sat back up. “Spending time with the people I care most about in this world. Just us, wasting the day away, doing nothing more strenuous than riding our horses.”

I nodded. ‘Me too.’ I signed. ‘I had felt so alone there for a while. I’m very sorry for giving up on all of you and not waiting.’

“It’s not your fault, Cupcake.” He trailed his fingers down my cheek and over the scar on my face. “We had been selfish in our decision making. We should have talked to you about it. We didn’t once think about what extending our time in would do to you.”

I looked down, gathering my courage, just as I had with Toby. I wanted everything out in the open with all three of them. When I looked back up to him I told him how I felt. ‘I love you Troy. I love al l three of you. I always have.’

A huge smile broke over his face. “I know, Cupcake. God knows I love you, too. We all do. We have talked about it a couple of times, and we know that we need to sit down and talk with you about it. We’ll figure everything out once Tory wakes up.”

‘I can’t choose between you. I wouldn’t even if I could. I would never want to be the cause of any problems between you guys.’

“I know that, and I’d never make you choose. I know you love us all, and I’m alright with that. As long as I’m part of your life , and have you in my life, I’ll be a happy man. You were too young when we left, and we had wanted you to be able to experience life and have the opportunities all teenagers get to have.” He picked me up and sat me on his lap sideways. “I never imagined you being put in the type of situation you went through , or I would never have left you. Inheritance or not, I would have stayed with you to keep you from what you’ve had to suffer.”

I looked up into his face and saw all of the love I felt for him reflected back to me through his eyes. I tilted my head up to kiss him while one hand held his cheek, and I snaked my other arm around his back. This kiss lasted a few seconds before I felt his tongue asking entrance. I granted it to him and tangled my tongue with his slowly. It was a very passionate kiss , slow , but heartfelt and building.

Troy very slowly, and without breaking the kiss, lowered me to where I was laying down and he was on one elbow beside me. He brought his leg over and I tangled it into mine. His mouth left min e and he started kissing down the scar on my face, to my jaw , and then down to my neck. He licked the scar across my throat and came back up and started nibbling where my neck meets my shoulder. I was normally very self-conscience about my scars, but I knew what he was saying by kissing them. He loved me in spite of my imperfections. He was trying to heal t he hurt that went with my scars. A nd he was. To know that he could love me, love my body, after someone violating it as Blain had, was healing a part of me that I thought was forever broken.

When he started suckling right beneath my ear, my body exploded in ecstasy. I never thought that was possible. I could feel the vibration in his chest as he chuckled after realizing what happened. He brought his head up to look at me and said, “I think I found your spot.” I could feel the blush creeping up my cheeks. He kissed me again. “Don’t be embarrassed. I have a spot, too. You’ll just have to find it.”

I slapped his arm before he crashed his lips back down on mine. I had to feel him. I started pulling at the t-shirt he had tucked into his faded jeans, but I was having trouble. He caught on to that fact and quickly pulled it off himself before returning his lips to mine. As I ran my hands up his back, feeling his very defined muscles, his hands started exploring my body. He rolled to where he was completely on top of me holding himself up using both elbows this time, but that didn’t stop his hands from finding my breasts. As my nipples hardened, he rolled them in between his fingers, sending electric currents straight down. I wrapped my legs around his waist , and one of his hands slid down to my thigh. He grabbed it as his lips again went down to the spot below my ear. Troy pushed my thigh where my legs were spread, and his hand went to the button of my jeans and undid them, sliding his hand down and rubbing my nub.

I felt the explosion building inside me again as he slid two fingers in me, but as soon as he did I had a flash of red hair in front of me smirking, and I jerked away. I started fighting, not remembering where I was just seeing Blain’s smug face as he did whatever he wanted. I tried to get up but felt arms around me, holding me. I started crying, shaking my head, just wishing it were over and he’d leave me alone.

“You’re mine, Kayla. I’ll never leave you.” I heard Blain whisper in my ear and I started trying to hit him, but he had my arms pinned to my sides.

“Marti! Come on, Baby. I’m so sorry, please look at me.” I heard Troy’s voice broke through , and I remembered. It was his arms holding me. I was safe.

I opened my eyes and mouthed ‘I’m so sorry’ as I sobbed. He adjusted us to where we were sitting up. I straddled his lap, put my arms around his neck, and cried into his shoulder.

“You don’t ever apologize to me. You did nothing wrong. I shouldn’t have moved so fast .” He said, brokenly.

I shook my head. He did nothing that I didn’t want him to and I leaned back and signed that to him. ‘I’m broken, Troy. I don’t know if yo u should waste your time on me.’

He hugged me to him. “You are not broken, Baby, and I’m not wasting my time. I love you, and I’m blessed to be here with you and to have you love me. I’ll go as slow and take as long as you need me to.”

After I had calmed down and quit shaking w e got up, folded the blanket we had used for the picnic, and made our way back to the horses holding hands. Troy loaded all the stuff on Moe and came over to help me up onto Nosey. When I was up, he turned to go over to his horse, but turned back when I tapped his shoulder. ‘You called me Baby.’ I said smiling. ‘But I like Cupcake better. It’s more you.’

He laughed, got up on Moe, and we made our way back to the stable. As I took the saddle gear off of Nosey, I saw a piece of paper float to the ground, but decided to brush her down before picking it up. When I did, my heart skipped a beat and I couldn’t breathe. When I finally took a breath, it was loud and ragged. Troy heard it and came over, “What wrong?” He asked.

So I showed him the note.

Chapter 11

It had been an hour since we left the barn, and I was still shaking. He was here. He was here, and he was watching me. Oh my God! He’d kill them all if he could n’t get to me.

Good thing you stopped him.

You’re mine!

That’s what the note said. I remember what he told me back while he had me chained. I had made the mistake of telling him that I would never belong to him. That I didn’t love him, I loved someone else.

I started rubbing my left thigh. He carved his name there, branding me ‘his’, he said. He had told me then, that if any other man touched me he would kill them first and then come for me. I couldn’t let any of my gu ys get hurt because of me, neither my brothers nor the triplets. If something happened to them, I’d never forgive myself.

“Toby said they’d be here tomorrow morning.” Troy told Jordan and I. Jordan had my head lying in his lap, stroking my hair, trying to calm me down. We were at Troy’s house , in his living room. He didn’t want me to go home until he discussed everything with Toby, Jordan, and James. He thought we should all move into his house until Blain was caught. The police were looking around the property, but we knew he’d already be gone.

“The helicopter will leave the hospital there around nine in the morning, bringing them to Piedmont Medical in Rock Hill, and then an ambulance will bring them here.” He continued. “He’s with me in wanting y’all to move in here. He said if anything, it’d be more of u s in one place to protect Marti, and she’ll be able to be here with Tory.”

I sat up on the couch so I could sign more easily . ‘I had wanted to stay here with Tory, and I was even going to suggest that James and Jordan come, too, but I can’t now. I’ll need to stay at my house.’

Troy was about to say something, but the doorbell sounded. It was James. He had been at work this morning, so Jordan called him back when Troy had pushed my panic button to get him to come to us. Jordan said he and James were not leaving my side again and he had his gun tucked in the back of his jeans.

James came straight over to me picked me up, squeezing me in a hug. “Are you okay , Sissy?” He asked.

I nodded, leaned back, and looked at the circles under his eyes. Looking at Jordan, I saw the same thing. They were losing sleep stressing over all of this, and now I had led a madman to our door. I looked over to Troy, and though he didn’t have the circles under his eyes, I could see the strain of worry etched on his face. Now though, it seemed as he was getting angry.

“What do you mean, stay at your house? I don’t think so.” He said in a low, threatening voice. “You are going to let us help you, and you need to be here for Tory. I know what you’re thinking, and none of us are going to let you do it.”

James set me down and looked at me. He knew me, so he’d probably figured out what I was thinking, too.

“What are you talking about” Jordan asked, looking between Troy and me. I looked down; it was no used to lie about it.

I could feel everyone looking at me, especially Troy. I didn’t have to see him to know he was glaring . “Tell them, Marti.” He said. “Tell them what’s going on in that thick skull of yours.”

My head jerked back up. That pissed me off. All I wanted to do was protect them, I wasn’t being thick headed.

‘I need to leave, to get away from here .’ I signed, my hands flying in jerky movements. I had already been shaky, but my whole body shook now with anger. ‘None of you will be safe if I’m here. I am his property. He will stop at nothing to get me back.’ I started sobbing then. I knew what I’d said was the truth.

Jordan pulled me in for one of his bear hugs. “Why do you think he’ll hurt us? Wouldn’t he try to get around us, instead? And why did he let you go, just to terrorize you like this?”

‘I don’t know why he let me go, but it was his reactions to things that let me know what he’s willing , and completely capable of doing.’

“Like what, Sis? His reactions to what?” He asked.

‘I argued with him at first, telling him I didn’t belong to him, that I lo ved someone else.’ I sat back down on the couch. ‘I even tried to escape twice. He told me throughout all of that, that if anyone else ever touched me, he would make me watch them die before he killed me.’ I didn’t go into the details of how he said he’d kill me.

“You have got to give us some credit, Cupcake. Let us take care of ourselves and protect you at the same time.” Troy came, sat beside me, and pulled me into his lap. “I hate to say this, but i f you leave, who’s to say he won’t come after us in an effort to find you? It will be safer if we all stick together.”

**********************************************************************

Later that evening, I was in the living room staring at the TV, not really seeing it. Troy was dozing right beside me on the leather sofa. He wouldn’t let me take the No-Doze or drink any Red Bull. He said I needed to get used to leaning on them again. I needed to let them carry the weight of my fears and help me through them, and not just avoid them.

I guess I could see his point, but that didn’t make it any easier. I still struggled to stay awake, and had lasted longer than him, but now I could feel myself spacing out like I normally did when I was about to crash. I thought about what they had said earlier. It would be harder for Blain to get me with them around, and if we all stuck together, then he wouldn’t be able to get one of them either. Of course, b eing with all three of the trips would be a bonus too .

I had to get Tory to wake up. Toby had said that he was in good condition, he just wasn’t waking up. I felt like I dreaming of a fairy tale every time I thought about and hoped for Tory to wake up when he got here to me. I was going to do everything in my power, which I knew wasn’t much, to make him better. Even with Toby and Troy home, I still felt like a piece of me was missing. I couldn’t wait to get that piece back.

********************************************************************

Tory was finally home. I was walking to the study where we’d set his room up with the hospital bed and all of the equipment and monitors. I didn’t hear or see anyone around. When I got to the study the door was closed. Was Toby or Troy with him for some reason? I knocked, but nobody answered, so I slowly opened the door, not wanting to disturb one of the brothers visiting with him.

No one was in there. I was wondering where everyone was, someone made it a point to be with me at all times, when I noticed Troy’s sheets covered in red. I ran over to the bed and saw why.

His throat had been slit so deep I could see bone. Not only that, but it looked like he had been stabbed at least fifty times. I let out a silent scream, forgetting I couldn’t make a sound, and turned to run out of the room, but Blain was blocking the way.

He got this evil, smug look on his face. “They’re all dead.” He said. “We can finally be together forever.” He lifted his hand that held a S&W revolver. “If y ou won’t live forever with me, then we will die together and spend eternity that way.”

And he pulled the trigger.

*********************************************************************

I shot up with Troy holding my shoulders. He’d obviously been trying to wake me up. He pulled me into his arms, onto his lap, and rocked me.

“It was just a nightmare, Cupcake. You are here with me, safe in my arms. I’ll always keep you safe.”

He kept whispering things that were supposed to be reassuring, but af ter that dream, I had to wonder who would keep them safe.

*******************************************************************

We were all outside waiting on the ambulance. Toby had called fifteen minutes before saying they were loaded and on the way. I couldn’t wait to see him and Tory. I had cooked a dinner for tonight, so all they had to do was warm it in the oven, and I could spend all my time with Tory. Jordan said he’d have my keyboard ready for me tonight, so I’d be able to talk to him.

Troy was with me and had his arm around my waist. We were sitting on bench swing on the wraparound porch of the tri-level ranch house they lived in. I could hear the activity going on inside. Extra medical personnel of the local home health care agency came out to make sure everything was set up properly, and that the transition went as smoothly as possible.

I saw the ambulance coming down the long driveway. I popped out of my seat, excited for them to finally be there. Troy called to the nurses to come help the EMTs get Tory in.

Toby hopped out of the back as soon as they stopped. I ran over to him, so I could be with Tory the whole way. When they got him out on the gurney, I couldn’t believe it. It barely looked like him; he’d lost so much weight. He had so many tubes and IV bags, it really hit home.

Tory was in a coma. They had told me a thousand times, and I heard them and understood, but for some reason, seeing him like that made everything real. This wasn’t going to be some fairy tale. My Tory was hurt and I didn’t know what to do.

“It’s going to be okay, Pea.” Toby said, wiping the tears away that I didn’t even realize were there.

We walked beside the gurney until we got to the steps of the porch , then we fell in behind the EMTs following them through the entry way, past the living room and dining area, to the study. I stood in the corner with Toby on one side and Troy on the other, watching as the EMTs and nurses worked together to transfer Tory to the bed. The EMT’s left after the nurses signed the transfer papers.

Jordan and James came in and joined us in the corner of the room.

“Hey, man.” Jordan said to Toby, giving him a slap on the back. “Did everything go alright on the way?”

“Yeah, smooth as silk.” He said tiredly.

They talked some more, but my attention stayed on Tory. When all was set, the nurses left to talk to Toby and Troy in the other room. James and Jordan left to give me time alone with Tory. I couldn’t talk to him, so I just went to the bed, climbed on the left side away from the monitors and IVs, and put my arms around him to hold him while I cried and prayed for him to wake up. I hadn’t prayed for a long time before I found out about Tory, never felt myself worthy of prayer, but I knew he was. God would listen for him. I would get my Tory back. After all the tears were extinguished, I fell in to the first dreamless sleep I’d had since escaping Blain. In my Tory’s arms.

Chapter 12

I woke up more refreshed than I’d been in so long. I hadn’t dreamed at all that I could remember. I looked around and saw that it was night time. There was a lamp on in the corner on a table between two wingback leather chairs, currently occupied with heavy breathing Toby and a snoring Troy.

The last time we had all slept in the same room was after a pool tournament we’d had up in the loft. All six of us, including my brothers, got smashed and just ended up sleeping wherever we’d fallen. I had woken up the next morning drooling on Tory’s chest. I had been mortified, but I played it off, teasing him about the ‘spit bath’ I had given him .

Tory and I had always played like that. Thinking of him, I turned back to face him. He looked so peaceful, like he was just asleep a nd would wake anytime, but I noticed how hollow his eyes looked. He was thinner, but still in no way small. I saw that he had a scar on his face just like mine except that it ran from his temple, over his eye and down to his chin, long ways, while mine was more across the side of my face.

I knew I shouldn’t, but I had to check him for any other injuries. I slid the blanket off of him, and saw three recent looking pinkish red scars that looked like gunshot wounds. There was what looked like a stab wound that was completely healed, looking like it was an older scar. Other than some normal cut and scrape scars on his legs, I didn’t see anything else. He had boxers on, and I wouldn’t stoop as low as to pull those off. As I covered him back up, I heard shuffling coming from the corner of the room.

“You finally got some sleep, I see.” Toby whispered coming over to where we were laying. “We didn’t wake you for lunch or dinner because James told us you hadn’t slept like that in years. None of us wanted to disturb that.” He put his hand on Tory’s arm and started rubbing absently, I think just to reassure himself that he was there. “So, were you molesting Little brother here?” He smirked.

I blushed, but I was too lazy to use my hands to answer, so I just pulled the blankets back down to where his chest was uncovered, and put my fingers softly on his scars, looking back at Toby.

“Yeah, I know. That happened this last time that put him here.” He said pointing to the most recent of the scars. Pointing to the others, he said, “This happened about a year and a couple of months ago.” He had this faraway look in his eyes as he was telling me. He was looking down at Tory, but not seeing him. “He had been caught, and he was held as a shield in front of the enemy. Luckily this is all that happened before someone from his team snuck up from behind and took the man out. It could have been a lot worse.”

I nodded. I realized that I was a very lucky woman to have them all still here. Even if Tory was in a coma, he was alive, which meant that there was hope. I just lay there, running my fingers over his hair that someone had obviously just cut into a buzz-cut style.

Toby looked at me. I could tell he was debating whether or not to say something to me, so I just rolled my hand in the air with a ‘come on and spit it out’ kind of motion. “I was going to wait until you felt comfortable coming to me to talk about things, but its killing me, and I have to know what that bast…” He looked away taking a breath before turning back to me. “What did he do to you?”

I looked down, trying to stop the tears that had gathered in my eyes from falling. I knew that I would eventually tell them. Maybe not all of it, but most. I just couldn’t yet, but after looking at Tory’s scars, I knew that they wouldn’t think I looked ugly with all my scars. I knew they had reacted better than expected to my face and throat, but my body was worse. I wouldn’t show the carvings or my back. I wasn’t ready for that, but I did pull my flannel shirt out of my jeans and showed my stomach. It was the least scarred part of me. I hadn’t even showed my brothers. They had seen some of it in the hospital, but not all of it.

With Toby’s reaction, I’m glad I hadn’t. “Son of a bitch!!” He yelled, making me jump, and I fell out of the bed.

Troy came running asking what happened. They both came, I thought to help me up, but Toby just ripped my shirt open to show Troy what he’d seen, which showed them my chest also . I couldn’t look at them, and I was crying full out now, but I heard Troy’s gasp. A couple of seconds later I heard a loud crash . When I looked up, I saw that Troy had punched a hole in the wall.

This was what I had been afraid of. I lay back down on the floor, curled into a ball, and turned away from them. I was sobbing so hard now; I couldn’t calm down and started hyperventilating. I heard voices around me, but I couldn’t separate who said what. Next thing I knew, I was in Jordan’s arms. He was carrying me to the room he was staying in. He pulled my shirt back on right, laid me down on the bed, and got in behind me and hugged me to him. James had obviously been there too, because got in the bed in front of me, whispering that it would be alright, stroking my hair.

I don’t know what happened to me. Everyone sounded far off and I couldn’t focus on James when I tried to look at him. It was like my vision was twitching. I saw his lips move as I guess he said something to Jordan . The bed dipped and moved behind me as Jordan got off the bed. A few minutes later, I felt a sting on the back of my upper arm. Jordan injected me with something. I couldn’t believe he did that. He knew my fear of needle s and injections, but a minute later, I knew why. My breathing evened out, and I was able to hear what was going on.

“Are you alright now?” James asked.

I nodded, put my arms around him to hug him to me, and rested my head against his chest. He just held me for a while, Jordan getting back in behind me, hugging be from behind. I finally calmed all the way down and was feeling better.

I knew Toby didn’t do that to hurt me. He was just shocked. I couldn’t blame him, I was hideous. I started to get up and my brothers loosened their grip to let me.

‘I’m hungry, what time is it?’ I signed.

“Three fifteen in the morning.” James answered. “You missed a couple meals, but you were finally sleeping so peacefully that me and J didn’t want to wake you up.” He looked at me, and I could see the tears in his eyes that he wouldn’t let fall. I knew he was concerned for me.

‘I’m alright, don’t worry.’

He nodded and gave me a hug. “I love you, Sissy.” He whispered in my hair.

Jordan took me from him and gave me a bear hug, “Let me in on the love, Sis.” He said, making me laugh, which was his intention.

We all headed to the kitchen and I set out to make a breakfast casserole. Toby and Troy must have heard the guys talking because they came into the room hesitantly. They both smiled at me, but it didn’t reach their eyes. I knew if they ever saw everything, that they’d start treating me different. I was too damaged.

I turned back to the granite counter top to prepare the early breakfast for everyone. I was trying not to think about anything. Too many things had been happening, and I didn’t know if I could handle anymore. I was still planning on using the keyboard so Tory could hear my voice, but after seeing the state he was in, my head was no longer in the clouds. I knew that it would take more than me talking to him to wake him up. What state would he be in when he did wake? Would he be able to get up and walk around, or would he need physical therapy? Would he still have his memories? Would he even remember me? If he would just wake up, I wouldn’t care about all that stuff. Even if he didn’t remember me, I would still do anything he needed me to do. I hated the waiting and the not knowing, and it had not even been twenty four hours yet.

And then there was the fact that Blain was watching me, and I didn’t know which way to go with that. Did I leave and try to get him to follow me away from the guys, or did I do what they wanted and let them watch over and protect me. I knew which option I wanted to go with, but that was for selfish reasons. I knew it would be better for them if I left. I decided to wait until Tory woke up and I could see he would be alright before I left. I would not leave him behind until I knew he would be alright .

I really didn’t want to leave anyone behind. I knew all too well how that felt, but they had their reasons for leaving me then, and now I have mine.

I was so into my thoughts I didn’t hear Toby and Troy approaching until I felt their arms come around me. They each bent down to put their chins on either of my shoulders.

“Please forgive me, Pea. I shouldn’t have done that to you.” Toby said softly. “It’s your place to show whom you will, and I violated the trust you gave in showing me. I am so sorry.”

“And I’m sorry for scaring you.” Troy added. “I was just so pissed at what that bastard did to you…No, that’s no excuse. I shouldn’t have blown up like that, and I’m sorry.”

I turned in their arms, putting my arms around each of them, and kissed their cheeks to let them know I was alright, and I forgave them. Troy ran his fingers lightly down my cheek, and kissed me softly. Then Toby turned my head to him and kissed me, running his tongue on my bottom lip asking for entrance, and I granted it to him.

“Ahhhh, come on, Sis! Not in front of us. That is not an image I want stuck in my head.” Jordan said, making a horrified face while James was chuckling.

The two trips went back and sat down at the table so I could finish breakfast . When I had the casserole out of the oven, and had the waffles ready, I made the plates and carried them to the table along with my bowl of grits. Conversations stopped as everyone dug into the food. I finished my grits and got up to start on dishes, but Jordan stopped me.

“I finished your keyboard last night. I tested it, and it works great. Sounds just like you.” He said smiling.

I jumped up and down clapping my hands, but stopped and blushed as I realized I was acting like a five year old. I forgot about the dishes, as I picked it up and walked to the study. When I got there and looked toward the bed, I dropped the keyboard at the sight.

Chapter 13

I couldn’t believe it. Tory’s eyes were open, his head turned toward the door. I thought he was awake, but as I rushed over to where he was and pushed the button on my bracelet to alert the guys, I noticed he wasn’t moving. His eyes were fixed on a certain spot, not seeing. I looked at his heart monitor and was reassured when I saw the ups and downs of his heart-rate. The monitor was set on silent and would only alert us if his heart-rate changed ; or his other vitals, like oxygen and blood pressure.

Toby and Troy were the first through the door, but as I was turning to them, I noticed a vase of roses on his side table. I froze. I couldn’t breathe. Toby noticed and came to me as Troy went to check on Tory.

“What happened, Pea?”

All I could do is point. How did he get in here, especially with all of us right down the hall? I couldn’t take a breath and my vision was turning dark. I couldn’t take it, and thankfully passed out.

When I woke up, my head was pounding. I kept my eyes closed and just laid there for a minute until I remembered what had happened. I shot up and looked around, getting light-headed from moving so fast. All of the guys were there and immediately at the side of the bed I was in, which was Tory’s bed, asking if I was alright. I couldn’t answer them. All of my concentration was on Tory, making sure he was ok ay and that there were no new marks on his body. There was no telling what Blain would do to him, but I didn’t see anything different. Looking at the monitors, I saw all of his vital signs were stable. His eyes were closed again making it seem like he was sleeping.

I finally turned my attention to Toby and Jordan who were the closest to me. ‘Did you fin d him? What did he do to Tory?’ I signed anxiously.

“What are you talking about, Cupcake?” Troy asked. “Nobody was here accept for you.”

I started crying. ‘I saw a vase of roses. His eyes were open and I thought he was dead at first until I looked at the monitor, but then I saw the roses. He was here. He’ll hurt Tory…’

Toby took me in his arms, stopping my hands from moving, and sat beside me on the bed. “I’m sorry, Pea. The roses were from our ranch foreman. We hired him a few months before we shipped out. I forgot to tell everyone that roses are not allowed here, there’s been so much going on. I promise that nobody was in here.” He turned my face so I was looking at him. “You are safe here. We won’t let anything happen to you.”

I leaned back a little so I could move my hands to sign. ‘I thought he was dead. I thought Blain had done something .’ I shook my head and tried to stem the tears and calm down. ‘Why were his eyes open? His head had moved. How di d that happen? Did he wake up?’

“We honestly don’t know, Pea. I asked the nurse, and she came and checked him over, but everything was fine. She said sometime s people in comas have muscle spasms, but she’d never heard of it causing their eyes to open.” He told me.

“Let’s just hope it means he’s trying to wake up.” James said. He had come over to hold my hand while Toby had tried to calm me.

‘What time is it? Are all of you hungry?’ I asked them, wiping my face. When they all nodded and told me it was a little past two, that I had slept the day away, we all headed to the kitchen where I made grilled cheese sandwiches and vegetable soup.

I spent the rest of the day with Toby and Troy in the study, using my keyboard to talk so Tory could hear my voice. I was still hoping it would make some kind of difference, and was happy when the first time I typed a sentence for it to speak to the boys, Tory’s heart fluttered on the monitor. It boosted the dwindled hope I had had for me being able to help him in some way. I was ecstatic that he had actually responded to my voice coming from the keyboard.

The rest of the week went like that, and on Friday, Toby a n d Troy decided to get me out of the house. We went on another horseback ride of our properties. I was scared and nervous because of what had happened last time. I felt like someone was watching our every move, but that stopped after the first hour or so.

James and Jordan had been going to the office every day to work, but James wasn’t feeling well that day, and had decided to stay in bed. Jordan said he would just watch TV in the study with Tory. I wouldn’t leave with the trips until I had taken care of James and sat through the physical therapy session for Tory that he had daily to keep his muscles from becoming atrophied. They told me it would help get him up and around sooner when he woke up.

We went to the loft for a while and played some pool, but when I started beating both of them; they wanted to change to the air hockey. They knew they could beat me at that. They were so immature sometimes, it was funny. They had me laughing and smiling all afternoon. When we left the loft, instead of going back to the house, they took me to the creek.

“So, do you wanna go frogging?” Troy asked?

My eyes shot wide and I shook my head. No way was I going to touch a frog. The trips talked me into doing a lot of things with them when we were younger, but that’s one thing I always refused to do.

‘I’ll get warts!’ I signed emphatically as I backed away.

Toby laughed, and already having a frog in his hands, started coming towards me. “That’s just an old wives tale, Pea. I did this all the time growing up, and I don’t have any warts.”

I still shook my head, laughing now. ‘That’s because you are one big wart.’ I said. I turned to run, but I hadn’t been paying attention to Troy. As soon as I turned I was caught up in his arms, and he was carrying me back over to Toby.

Toby came at me slowly with an evil smile on his face, and the frog raised in his hand. “Come on and kiss it, Pea. It’ll give you seven years good luck.”

I just kept shaking my head. I couldn’t talk to him because of the hold Troy had on me, my arms were pinned to my sides. I struggled to get my arms free so I could hide my face, but I couldn’t. I was laughing so hard, tears were streaming down my face. I lifted my legs to try to hold him back, but he just grabbed them into one arm, while he used the other hand to put the frog down my shirt. I opened my mouth in a scream that didn’t come out. Some things are just instinctive, especially to girls, and screaming when a frog is placed down your shirt is one of them.

Troy put me down as soon as the frog was in my shirt, and I started hopping around trying to get my shirt out of my jeans to let the frog drop out of the bottom. When I had trouble getting it, I just ripped it down the buttons and slung it off my arms. I heard the trips laughing the whole time, Toby having fallen to the ground from laughing so hard. That’s when I saw the frog that had dropped to the ground, not moving. I took a minute to catch my breath, and then bent down to see what had happened to it. As much as I hated frogs, I didn’t mean to kill it. When I looked at it closer, I noticed the inked in eyes. They had done that with one of those fake frogs made to look real. I shot up, turning to them and just signed ‘run’ before I took off after them. I caught up to Toby first and jumped on his back sending us both to the ground. He managed to turn over and grab my hands before I got his secret spot.

Each of the triplets had certain spots where they were ticklish. None of them had them in the same places, but I had learned over the years where to attack each one. After a minute, I jerked my hands out of his, and asked. ‘You planned this didn’t you?’

Toby laughed holding his hands up in surrender, “I swear, we just found that at the loft.” Then he pointed to Troy. “It was his fault! I just did what he told me to do!”

I shook my head at him in mock disappointment.

‘That was a bad lie, Toby.’ I signed. ‘I might have believed it if it wasn’t you who had the frog in hand. Tha t pointed out the guilty party.’ And I attacked him, tickling him until he was as breathless as I had been and was begging for mercy. I leaned back up , ‘You’re lucky I’m the good one. I couldn’t beg you for mercy.’ I signed.

He chuckled, and then his eyes drifted down and he brought his hands up to trace the words that had been carved into my skin. I realized that I had actually forgotten about my scars. I went to put the arms of my sh irt back on, but felt hands sto p me from the back.

Troy started tracing my back. “Sweet Jesus.” He whispered. “Don’t hide from us, Cupcake. You have nothing to be ashamed of. All of this,” he said running his fingers lightly over my back, which was nothing but scars from all of the whippings, “Doesn’t change who you are, or how we see you.”

Those words meant so much to me, especially coming from them. Toby sat up, me still straddling him, and ran his finger down my face before kissing me softly. All of the touching and the fingers running over my skin, made me feel things I hadn’t felt in years. I hadn’t felt like this since before they left. I felt Troy’s lips on my back, and stiffened, but I relaxed as Toby ran his tongue along the seam of my mouth, asking entrance. I granted it, tangling my tongue with his. It felt strange to have two sets of lips on me, but it felt so right at the same time. To know that two of the men I was in love with, loved me back was an amazing feeling, but I still felt like something was missing. Or I guess I should say someone.

I stood up, moving away from Toby and Troy, putting my shirt back on the best I could with all of the buttons missing. I looked out over t he creek and into woods. Was I a slut? I had never heard of a relationship like this except in a romance novel. This didn’t happen in the real world. And then for me to feel like this with two men and still wanting the third one to join us…Was something wrong with me? I heard the boys come up behind me.

“We’re sorry, Pea. We both got carried away in the moment.” Toby said.

Troy turned me around and lifted my chin to look in my eyes. “What’s going on, baby?” He asked.

I told them what I had been thinking. All of it. I knew that if we were going to try this, we had to be completely open and honest with each other.

“You are NOT a slut, and I don’t want you to say that again.” Toby said. “A relationship like the one we are going to have is unorthodox, but we love each other. Love can not be wrong in any form .”

“And you are right. It doesn’t feel complete, and it won’t until Tory wakes up, but just know that we do love you, Marti.” Troy added.

“With all of our hearts.” Toby finished.

‘I love both of you, too’ I signed, and kissed them both softly.

We went back to our horses and headed back to the house. That whole day had just re affirmed why I loved them as I did. They could make me feel better, no matter what was going on around us. I had actually forgotten my troubles and had fun. It had been so long since I had felt that care-free, and it was because of them. We had spent the day playing around like we used to when we were teenager s. The only thing missing was Tor y. I couldn’t wait for him to wake up. Then, my family would be complete again.

Chapter 14

‘Do you remember the day you took me to the Catawba Dam?’ I was sitting in a chair beside Tory’s bed using my keyboard to talk to him , like I had every day for the past three weeks, and going over some of the memories I had with just him and me. I had been going over them in my head a lot , wishing he would wake up so we could make more memories together . ‘We went out there right after you cooked me a breakfast of scalded grits and your famous rubbery eggs. Everyone knows you can’t cook, except for you, but I ate it gladly because you had taken the time to cook for me. You never were one to do anything, you and your lazy butt, always saying it was too much work, even if was just to pass the remote to someone. We all love you anyways though.’ I corrected myself. If he could hear me, I didn’t want him to think I was complaining. ‘Anyway, you took me to the woods, and I didn’t know what we were doing. You had me walking in circles, laughing at me when I finally figured out we had passed the same tree four times. You loved playing tricks on everyone, and believe it or not, I miss your little tricks.’

‘After, what? An hour? We finally broke through the trees to the dam. It was a beautiful concrete waterfall with about six different outlets. You had set everything up before hand with fishing poles, bait and beer. I was only fourteen, and you were already a bad influence on me, trying to get me drunk. We fished and danced to the music on the radio you brought.’

My eyes were starting to well up, remembering that day. It was one of the most amazing days for me. A day of several firsts . ‘That was the first time I had danced with anyone. It was my first trip to the river, and it was the first time anyone not family had kissed me. I remember at the end of the day right before we started packing up, you asked me to kiss you. I was so shocked I was speechless. I already was half in love with you boys, and I didn’t know if that meant you felt the same way or not, but you broke my heart, though I tried not to show it. When I didn’t answer you, you begged me, saying that you had a date and needed to practice. At the time I believed you, but I kissed you anyway. I figured I would rather have you as just a friend, then not to have you at all. It was one of the best, most memorable kisses I’ve ever had. Then, I realized that you wouldn’t have kissed me if you were going out with someone else, and that’s when it heated up.’

“Believe me, I remember, Princess.” A dry and croaky voice said from the bed.

I had been sitting in the chair, on two legs, with my feet propped on the side of the bed, and I had been in my own world while I had been typing, so I hadn’t noticed him moving. When I saw his beautiful golden brown eyes looking at me, I tried to jump up; falling back wards in the chair in the process.

“I guess I still knock you off your feet, huh.” He said weakly as I was getting up off the floor. I pushed the button on my bracelet, which all of the guys had a receiver to now, and I ran over to Tory jumping on the bed, taking him into my arms, and crying into his neck. I couldn’t believe that I had my Tory back.

I heard shouts from all over, calling my name, and heard stomping down the stairs and running throughout the house. They all stopped as they got to the study.

“Thank you, Jesus. It’d damn good to see you awake, Bro.” I actually couldn’t tell if it was Toby or Troy who said that , which was very unusual for me.

I just laid there in his arms, still crying, with his arms around me rubbing my back. I knew everyone was welcoming him back, but I couldn’t concentrate on what was being said. I only had one thought. I finally had all my guys back.

“Come on, Princess.” He said trying to lift my head from his neck. “You haven’t said anything since I spoke up. I’d been listening for a while, but I had trouble opening my eyes. Come on, sweet thing, look at me and show me your beautiful face.”

It went quiet in the room. I just shook my head in his neck. I didn’t want him to see me. This was a happy time. He was finally awake, and I knew the happy atmosphere would change as soon as he saw my face and then realized I couldn’t speak to him.

“Princess please, I have to see you.” He pleaded, and I couldn’t deny him. I lifted my head, but kept my eyes closed. I didn’t want to see the shock or anger that would surely be on his face.

I felt him touch my face softly, and though I had finished crying, a couple more tears escape my closed eyelids. I hated the feeling of inadequacy; that I was so weak and stupid to have let this happen to me. I felt defenseless. I had been held for two weeks by a mad man, and I hadn’t been able to fight back or escape no matter how hard I’d tried. Every time someone I cared about looked at me like this, all of those feelings resurfaced.

“Princess, look at me.” He was sounding weaker than before, and when I opened my eyes to look in his, I could see the strain in them along with the anger, worry and curiosity. “How did this happen?”

He looked at me waiting for me to answer, but my arms were around him still and I didn’t want to let him go, so I couldn’t sign, and my keyboard was still on the floor . I looked to Jordan for him to explain.

“Tory, Marti can’t talk anymore. Her voice box was damaged beyond repair.” He said softly.

Tory let out a frustrated breath. “She was just talking to me. How can you say she can’t talk?” He asked while pulling me back to his chest in a protective way.

Jordan looked around for the keyboard. When he saw it, he picked it up and started typing. “When she types on here it uses her voice to speak what she’s typing.” We heard my voice say from the keyboard.

“That’s actually pretty cool.” Tory said, thankfully dropping the subject of what had happened to me. I knew he would still question me at a later time, but at least we could pretend for the time being and celebrate the fact the he was amongst the living again.

The guys all got seats around the room and pulled them closer to the bed. They spent the next couple of hours talking and catching up. Toby tried to clear everyone out once, but Tory said he didn’t want to go back to sleep. He said he’d spent so much time trying to open his eyes, that he was half afraid to close them again. The doctor had come by for a brief evaluation and assured us that everything was fine, and Tory would be up and around in no time after some rest and physical therapy to build up his strength.

After another little while of listening to Tory laughing and cutting up with the others, I started to doze off. I wasn’t fully asleep, but not really fully awake either. When the others noticed my eyes closed, they started talking softly.

“I don’t know how or why, but when she sleeps with you she doesn’t have nightmares.” I heard James say softly.

“Yeah, Sis hasn’t really had a peaceful sleep since she escaped that son of a bitch.” Jordan added. “She had gotten addicted to energy drinks, and had an endless supply of No-Doze along with medication to help her stay awake. She lied to the doctor and told him she couldn’t wake up in the mornings, so he bli ndly prescribed them to her. Sis would go days without any sleep. Hell, the doc had put her on Klonopin for a while, but she stopped taking it because it would calm her down to the point that she would fall asleep without meaning to.”

“What was with that injection you gave her with her panic attack? Did that not help her sleep without a nightmare?” Toby asked.

“Sissy said she doesn’t dream, but she’s not rested when she comes out of it. If anything, it makes her groggier.”

“She’s been sleeping with you since you’ve been here.” I heard Troy say, I guess to Tory. “The first day she got into bed with you to hold you. She fell asleep, and woke up energized. She said later that she didn’t know why, but she was going to take advantage of it.”

Tory’s arm squeezed me a bit. “I don’t mind. I’ve missed her like hell. I’ll take any time with her that she’ll give me. Now, though, I want y’all to tell me what the hell happened to her?”

“We don’t know much; she won’t talk about it, but basically she was dating someone she had met online. We found out later that the bastard gave her a fake name. Anyway, basically she wouldn’t sleep with him, said she wasn’t ready, so he decided to take her. He had her for two weeks, torturing the shit out of her in a twisted form of BDSM.” Jordan told him. “God only know s what all he did to her. When she finally got out of there , she had an arm broken in several places, and the other wrist was sprained. Not to mention the broken ankle, two ribs that had been broken and were healing out of place.” His voice broke and I wanted to comfort him, but my mind was so spaced out; I couldn’t make myself move. It was almost as if I was in a dream state. “Her body was covered in old and fresh cuts; some of which he’d stitched up himself. She had morphine in her system, so at least some of the pain was dulled from that. I don’t know how she got herself out. The room he kept her in was on the third floor of some run-down abandoned mansion. It had chains, whips, floggers, paddles…There was dried blood everywhere.”

“Do you know how she escaped?” Tory asked.

“She said that when she woke up, he was gone and had left her uncuffed, so she got out. She said it took her a long time, and she passed out a couple of times, but she said she couldn’t take anymore.” I had never heard Jordan so broken up about anything. I knew it had affected my brothers, but I never knew to what extent. “It was either get out or kill herself. When she made it to the street, a passer-by saw her and called an ambulance. We had been looking for her, so when she was found, we were immediately called.”

“What did the guy call himself?” Tory asked

“Blain Robinson. The investigators said that it was an alias, and that he didn’t exist.”

The guys still talked, but my mind was fading into sleep. The last thing I heard was Troy. “Well, I’m going to find the son of a bitch, and I’m gonna kill him.”

Chapter 15

“…let the foreman go yesterday.”

I heard low voices as came awake, and then I felt the hard chest, that was my pillow, move a little trying to readjust himself. I got up off of him so he had more freedom of movement. When I looked down at him smiling at me, I just had to bend down to kiss him. I was still so high on happiness about him being awake. I sat back up and looked over to see Toby sitting in the chair by the bed.

‘What were you talking about?’ I signed the question.

“Nothing really,” He responded, sending a quick look over to Tory. “Just some ranch stuff.”

I nodded.

“I’m sorry, Princess, but can I ask you to fix me something good to eat while Toby helps me get some personal stuff done?” He said, lowering his voice for some reason. Then it clicked. Personal stuff .

A blush heated my cheeks as I nodded. ‘Anything in particular you’d like to eat ?’

“You’re a genius in the kitchen, babe, so whatever is fine with me.”

I quickly left so they could take care of his needs. When I got to the kitchen, I saw James, Jordan, and Troy sitting at the table, concentrating on different things.

I tapped Troy on the shoulder. When he looked up I signed, ‘Toby is going to help Tory with some things, so he might need help, especially if Tory wants a shower. I’m going to cook breakfast for everyone.’

He smirked when he realized what the ‘things’ were, probably because of the stupid blush heating my face again.

He got up, gave me a peck on the lips before walking away chuckling to himself at my expense.

I looked back at my brothers and glared at them for all of the snickering I had heard, but then I saw what James was drinking.

I laughed silently. ‘Not getting enough pussy from Shelby ?’

It was his turn to blush as he threw a dish towel that had been sitting on the table. Jordan was laughing so hard now; he had tears streaming down his face. On the last run Jordan had made to town for groceries, he had stocked me up on a new brand of energy drink called ‘Pussy’. He said that he had liked the sign on the display that read ‘The Drink is Pure. It’s Your Mind That’s the Problem’. I knew that the first time someone caught me drinking it; they would tease me about it. I was just glad that I had got James first.

I didn’t drink energy drinks as often as I used to now since I could have peaceful sleep with Tory. I didn’t take the pills anymore, either. I wondered as I was getting breakfast ready why I was sleeping so well now. It started when I fell asleep with Tory that first day. I knew it wasn’t because my feelings were stronger for him than the others; I loved them all equally. The only reason I could come up with is that they were all finally here with me, and I felt safer now than I have in years. Just them being in the same house with me made me feel that way. Like now, they weren’t in the same room with me, watching over me, but I still felt safe that they were close by if anything happened.

I used to love to sing, but I truly wasn’t any good at it. I was singing Set Fire To The Rain by Adele in my head. It was playing on the radio I had turned on in the kitchen. I guess it was a good thing my brothers couldn’t hear me. They used to tease me about making dogs howl whenever I would sing around them.

I was a good dancer though, thanks to Tory; who taught me. I didn’t realize I had been dancing around as I was cooking until Jordan brought it up.

“I haven’t seen you this happy in a long time, Sis.” He said. “I didn’t realize how much the trips affected you until now. I guess looking back, I can see it.” He came over to give me a hug. “You were always so quiet after Mom died. Then we moved here and you slowly started opening up again.”

“Yeah, we had done everything together before she died.” James added as Jordan took his seat so I could finish cooking. “I missed that, and of course when we moved here, I was a little jealous of the guys when they were here. I almost felt like you would forget about me and spend all of your time with them, but then I did realize how much they were helping you come back to being yourself. You always tried to include me, but I let my jealousy get in the way at first. Once I gave in and would hang with y’all, I saw you shine around them, and I was just so happy to be around for that, but I cherished the time during the school year when it was just us. You might be eleven months older than me, but I don’t see how twins could feel any closer than I do to you. I hated having to leave you; first with the exchange, and then college. I felt like I lost you all over again. Then everything happened…” He looked down for a second before he looked back at me, his eyes moist. “I’m just happy to be able to see you smiling, laughing, dancing. I missed it.” He smiled. “But I sure don’t miss your singing.”

Jordan burst out laughing, and I joined in. I loved my brothers so much. I don’t know how I would have kept going, after everything Blain did, if it weren’t for them. I turned around so I could sign that to them. They both got up, came to me, and enveloped me in a hug, squeezing me. They stayed by the stove to help me finish the grits, bacon, and toast. When everything was done, I decided to go get the trips. I knew they should have been finished with Tory by then.

As I approached the study, I heard them talking.

“I heard him; he said he would have her.” I knew that was Tory, since his voice was still a little strained, and I wondered who he was talking about. I went up to the door, but they still didn’t notice me.

“Damn it! If I had known that, I would have killed the bastard, not just fire his ass.” Toby said. “Do we know where he lives or where he goes when he’s off the ranch?”

“Hell no, he packed up and left everything behind; said he didn’t have any family, so it didn’t matter.” Troy said. “I’m going to call Greg; get him to do an extensive background check on both names and see if he can pull up anything.”

I knocked on the wall to get their attention. They all jumped, not expecting me. Tory was sitting on the edge of the bed, and Toby and Troy were in chairs. I walked over to Tory, and signed , ‘You want to come into the kitchen and eat with us, or do we bring it in here?’

“Let’s go into the kitchen. I am so sick of lying down.” He looked at me, tilted his head, and gave puppy eyes. “Will you help support me? I’m still feeling a little weak.”

I laughed. ‘You didn’t have to give me the look. I would have done it anyway.’

I bent down a little to put his arm around me. When he stood up, he surprised me by using that arm to pull me close enough for him to kiss me. It was just like I remembered it. I felt the heat from his kiss spread throughout my body . I missed this; his kiss. Each triplet had a different and equally potent kiss, but something I knew about Tory is that he had never kissed anyone else, and he was a virgin. Unless of course that changed while he was in the military, but he had once told me that he didn’t begrudge his brothers for what they did because he only wanted his one special woman; that his virginity was the one thing that he would never be able to take back if things didn’t work out. That was one of the many points we had agreed about, but of course that was ruined for me. I no longer had that gift to give. I had only ever wanted my boys . I was so stupid to let loneliness make me go out with someone who ended up being psycho .

I guess he felt my change in mood, because he backed out of the kiss, and looked down into my eyes. “I didn’t mean to make you sad by doing that.” I think I’d hurt him with my reaction.

I made sure he was steady, and looked at the other two to let them know I needed a minute with Tory. When they walked out of the room, I turned back to Tory. ‘It wasn’t you, it was me.’ I huffed out a breath in frustration. Tory just looked confused, so I explained. ‘I was thinking how our kisses are so special, and how you were saving yourself for the woman you’d marry.’

“I know by now you know that you have always been that person for me.” He said.

I nodded. ‘Yes, I know, and I’ve always loved you and your brothers, but that wasn’t what I was talking about. I was doing the same thing. I was saving myself, even when I went on those dates; I never did anything , but…’ I looked down trying to hold back the tears. I was so tired of crying.

Tory lifted my chin so I’d look up at him. “But?” He asked, waiting for me to continue.

‘But that was taken away. I no longer have that gift to give.’

“Yes, you do Marti.” He said, tucking a lock of my hair behind my ear. “You are still a virgin, honey. That gift, your virginity, is something freely given. It doesn’t matter if one little piece of your anatomy is missing. It was taken, not given. The love that comes with the first time you give yourself; that is the true gift, and no one can take that from you.”

I couldn’t hold it back anymore, I cried. Tory pulled me back into his arms and rocked me as he held me, letting me cry it all out. Everything that had happened came crashing down and all my insecurities gone in that one beautiful, loving statement. I didn’t know it was possible to love these men any more than I already did, but with all of the soft touches, and lo ving words spoken had proved me wrong. I loved them more and more every day, and I was so blessed to have them love me back and to be back with me.

After my tears stopped, Tory wiped remnants away with the back of his fingers, and put his arm back over my shoulder , kissing my temple. He was putting a good amount of his weight on me , but I bore it because I knew with as much standing and walking he’d been doing that he was getting tired and his legs wer e more than likely weak from disuse. Even though he’d been having the physical therapy since he’d been in a coma, it’s not the same as using them, but he’d never say anything, especially to, or in front of, me.

I got him to the kitchen and into a chair. The guys were waiting on us to eat, so I fixed everyone’s plates and sat down to eat. They all chatted about things, still trying to get Tory up to date on things that were going on with the ranch, and my brothers were telling him about their businesses.

After breakfast, Jordan and James helped me rinse the dishes and put them in the dishwasher, and I gave them the hint that I wanted to talk to the trips, so they took off to our house to pick up some supplies we needed.

I sat back at the table between Toby and Tory, with Troy on the other side of Tory.

‘Okay.’ I signed with a look on my face that better had told them I meant business. ‘I’ve heard several things that you all have said about someone, and I have a feeling it has to do with me, so somebody better start talking.’

By the looks on all of their faces, I knew I had hit the nail on the head. They knew something, and I didn’t think I was going to like it.

Chapter 16

“Princess, we know who Blain is.” Tory said, grabbing my hand. He looked at my face, I guess he was waiting for a reaction.

I was in shock. How did they know? The police, even looking all this time, couldn’t figure it out. I looked at the other two. There was a mixture of anger and sympathy on both of their faces. ‘How do you know? Have you seen him? Is he here?’ I signed rapidly. I was starting to panic. I couldn’t go with him again. I wouldn’t survive all of that again. Tory brought my attention back to him.

“He is not here right now, but he has been.” He looked over to Troy, but he just shook his head, so Tory looked back at me. “While I was in the coma, there were periods to where I could hear you, or my brothers, but there was one time that I heard someone walking around the room complaining about the time you were spending with Toby and Troy. He said that it would have to stop, or he would stop it for you . He said he should have never let you go, and he wants you back.”

By this time I was shaking, but I wouldn’t let the tears fall. I had to toughen up. The only way he would think of stopping it would be to hurt, or worse, kill one of them. I couldn’t let that happen.

“Damn it, Tory, did you have to tell her like that?” Toby asked, getting up to come kneel by me. He was visibly upset, and my reaction wasn’t helping anything. “Look at how much she’s shaking.” He picked me up off of the chair and sat down in my place, putting me on his lap, so he could hold me.

“I ain’t gonna keep anything from her. She needs to know, and she would get mad if we didn’t tell her. Now, are y’all gonna tell her the rest, or am I?”

“Before we left, you know we hired a foreman to keep up the ranch while we were gone, right?” Troy spoke up, and asked. I nodded, so he continued. “We hired a man Roger Beckham. He lived alone, just having moved here from Texas, and had experience, so we hired him on. Whenever we would come home, things would look great, so we kept him on, thinking he was doing a good job. After your daddy died, we asked him to keep an eye on you for us, and to send word if anything happened , since you were taking it so hard . We had been worried about you. Well, Toby here was already pissed because he never sent word to us that you had been kidnapped, so of course we never knew anything bad had happened. He defended himself saying that he didn’t know until after you had been found, and then Jordan told h im not to tell us, giving your not wanting us to know. We confirmed that Jordan had told him that, so Toby let it go. Then, the more I explored the ranch and checked on things, the more I saw how he let things go, only keeping the surface chores done ; the things immediately noticeable. There are a lot of things in disrepair, so I decided to let him go. He fought it, but left in the end. Then, this morning, talking to Tory and filling him in on what was going on with the ranch, we talked about several things, like the roses. When he told me what he’d heard, we put two and two together.”

“It’s our fault.” Toby said into my hair. “We hired him. We brought him here. Hell, we even told him to keep an eye on you. It’s our fault he did that to you .” His voice broke at the end.

I jumped off of his lap at turned to face all three of them. ‘No! None of you are at fault!’ I signed rapidly , my hands still shaking. ‘I had already been in contact with him through the book club we were both a part of. Daddy died about a month after I signed up for that group, and we’d already discussed a couple of books and other things, so he had started before you even told him that. He is crazy, and nothing you did or said caused that, so I better not hear any of you blaming yourselves .’

“Princess, I’m sorry, but I agree with Toby. There are too many things we should have done differently. We were finished with training and school; we just wanted to stay on each of our spec op teams for a while longer. Look how that turned out for all of us.” Tory said with such regret in his voice.

‘I’m happy that you all liked what you were doing. It’s awful being forced to do something you hate, and all of you feared that when you left; that you would hate it.’ They had each gone to college while training for their branch of the military so the government would pay for their education. ‘I don’t blame any of you. Do you want me blaming myself?’ I asked sitting back on Toby’s lap while rubbing the top of Tory’s hand.

“Why the hell would you blame yourself? You didn’t want any of that to happen.” Troy exclaimed, coming to take the seat on the other side of Toby.

‘You all keep telling me not to blame myself, but I’m the one who agreed to meet someone I had met on the internet. I had heard all of the horror stories, but stupid me thought it would never actually happen to me. Look how that turned out.’ Troy was about to say something, but I held up my hand to stop him. ‘My point is, all of us could say we should have done this, or what if I’d done that, but it’s too late. Things happened to all of us, and nothing can change it. All we can do now is figure out what the next step is. Am I scared? Yes, but I have to buck up, or someone is going to get hurt or worse.’

Toby turned my head to him and kissed me softly. “You are an amazing woman. Do you know that?”

“We all want to be with you,” Tory added.

“We can’t live without you anymore.” Troy finished. “Will you be with all of us?”

‘I’ve been dreaming of this for so long, but…is it right? I don’t want to do anything that will come between you three.’

“We know that you love each of us individually. We will all want to spend time with you alone, but most of the time it will be all of us together.” Tory said. “We all know there is no room for jealousy. All that matters to any of us is that you are happy.”

I leaned over to kiss him, and then turned to Troy to kiss him. Finally I looked up at Toby. He smiled at me leaned down and kissed me. “This was how it was always meant to be.” He said.

Just then, James walked in. He immediately covered his eyes. “Ewe!! I do not need to see my sissy getting all sweet with y’all.” He said as he was walking toward the refrigerator. He ended up running into it, falling back on his butt. We all started laughing at him.

He looked up at me with his puppy dog eyes and started whining. “Sissy, I hurt my butt.” He sounded like a five year old. “Kiss it and make it better.”

I scrunched up my face. ‘No way! I’ll kick it though.’

The trips busted out laughing even harder than they had been while I got up and went to help him up, but he pulled me down to the floor and started tickling me.

“I’ll show you who’s going to kick whose butt.” He said.

After a couple of minutes of torture, he finally let me up. It took me a while for my vision to clear and my breathing to regulate, but when it did, I lit into them.

‘You’ I pointed at James. ‘I am so not cooking for you for a week .’ I glared over at the trips, who all try to pull off an innocent ‘what did we do?’ look, but it didn’t work when they were all still holding back their laughter. ‘I see how it’s going to be. You are going to take their side on things, not coming to my rescue.’

“Come on, Pea. You were just too cute over there on the floor,” Toby said.

“We were too busy,” Troy added.

“Admiring your beauty.” Tory finished.

I was so glad to hear them that way. I had missed their triplet thing to where they would finish each other’s sentences, like each knew what the other was thinking. I shook my head. I knew they had done it on purpose because I loved it. ‘Don’t think that you are going to distract me by doing that.’

“Doing what?” They all asked in perfect harmony.

I was trying really hard to suppress the smile wanting to break out. ‘That.’ I pointed at them. ‘That thing to where you all talk together.’

We ended up all going back to the study to talk because I could tell Tory was tired. He again put his arm around my shoulder, but this time Toby helped on the other side. He asked Toby to help him to the bathroom before we got all the way to the study. I went on, leaving them to take care of Tory’s business.

‘Where is Jordan?’ I asked as I sat on the side of the bed.

“He still at our house getting some materials he needs to boost the security system around here. No offense Troy, but this house only has a standard system. He has our house wired to where no one can cough without the alarms being set off.”

“No, I don’t mind. I’m going to be beefing things up around here anyway.” Troy said. “Both Toby and I are going to be calling in some buddies of ours to come in as look outs. I don’t want there to be any possibility that that bastard will get past us. We’re going to get his ass, and if we catch him on our property we can kill him with no consequences.” He had the scariest look on his face as he said that. I was just glad it wasn’t directed at me. I had never had one of the trips make me feel scared before, but even though the look wasn’t directed at me, it sent shivers up my spine, and not the good kind they normally made me feel.

I guess he saw my reaction because next thing I knew, he was in front of me with my face in between his hands, and he put his forehead to mine. “I’m so sorry, Cupcake.” He whispered for only me to hear. “You have to know that I’d never hurt you. I’d rather pull my own fingernails off first.”

I made a face at that statement. It was a disturbing thought, but I understood the sentiment behind it, so I nodded. I grabbed his shirt and pulled him even closer than he was. I tipped my head back so my lips could meet his. I kissed him softly , but soon, his tongue was seeking entrance, and I let him in. As soon as he tangled his tongue with mine, it was like a fire ignited. My arms shot around his neck, and I pulled him down on top of me on the bed. I ran my hands down his chest to the waistband of his jeans. I pulled the shirt out, wanting to feel his skin, and slipped my hands into it and up his back. He took the hint and sat up, pulling both his flannel shirt, and the t-shirt underneath, off at the same time. He then bent over me, kissing and licking a trail from underneath my ear down to the crook of my neck. His hands were squeezing my breasts. When he pinched my nipples, sparks ignited and shot a trail straight down to my groin . It felt like deja vous. I faintly heard grumbling in the background as James left the room. I felt a twinge of embarrassment, but it quickly dissolved when Troy’s talented mouth went back to the sweet spot behind my ear. He pulled my shirt up, and lifted off of me long enough to take it off before getting back to my mouth.

An hour, or just a couple minutes later, somewhere in that range, I heard a gasp from the door, but I was too lost to Troy’s hands and mouth on my body to look over.

“Damn.” I heard Tory whisper, and I started to get self-conscience until I heard Toby say to him, “Yea h man , they started without us.”

Next thing I know, Toby is replacing Troy on top of me, and I felt the bed dip on either side of me. As I was getting into the kiss with Toby, I felt another set of lips on my shoulder, and another set of hands working the front clasp on my bra. Then a hand from either side slipped the straps down my arms, and two mouths were sucking at my nipples, hands sliding down to the button of my jeans. I stiffened for a moment and the hands stopped in their path, but I reminded myself that these were the men I loved whom loved me in return, and I was able to relax again. The hands continued their path down my abdomen to my jeans , which were quickly unbuttoned, and slipped inside.

Toby’s mouth left mine to work its way down my neck, passing over my collar bone and finding my breast s . Tory took Toby’s place at my mouth. I looked in his eyes, and saw all of the love I‘d always dreamed of seeing in their eyes. He lifted up and whispered “I love you, Marti.”

Troy trailed his mouth down my stomach, pausing to dip his tongue in my belly button. I had never considered that an erogenous zone, but it sure did send a lightning bolt straight to my mound. I slid the fingers of my right hand into his hair as he finished making his way down to the jeans he’s slowly been removing without me realizing it. I had so many sensations coming from different places, my body was in overload.

I pulled Tory down to kiss him with a hunger I never knew I’d possess. As soon as Troy’s tongue licked my delicate nub, I exploded in sensual sensations . He sucked and licked, prolonging my orgasm until I felt like I’d pass out. I hadn’t realized I was holding my breath until Toby whispered, “Breathe .” b efore going back to suckling and biting my nipple while using his hand to pinch my other one in the same rhythm.

Troy slowed his licks and worked his tongue into my channel, lapping up all the juices, but all of a sudden there was a loud knock o n the door.

“So sorry to interrupt, but Jordan called.” I heard James say as we were quickly trying to get me dressed again. After I was decent, Troy, with his shirt still off, opened the door to let James in.

James looked straight at me, which made me blush, but his next words had all of the color draining from my face.

“We have to get over to our house. NOW!”

Chapter 17

My house was on fire? I couldn’t believe it. I hadn’t given James the time to give me details; I had just run as fast as I could through the woods, down the path that had been made just for us all those years ago. I realized later how stupid that was, but I had to get there to make sure Jordan was alright. I was not thinking clearly, or I would have realized that if Jordan was the one to call James, that must’ve meant he was okay.

As soon as I broke out into our back yard, I saw the flames shooting in the air. This was no normal fire; someone had set this off, and I knew who. My whole life’s work, mementos of my mother’s, most of my memories; all going up in flames because he wanted to send me a message. Tears were falling down my face as I stood frozen to the spo t staring . Then I remembered that Jordan had been here. He was who I had run to check on, and I had to find him. With that reminder, I was finally able to move and I started running, but tripped over a root sticking up from the ground.

I heard Toby and James running up behind me, yelling my name, but all I could think of was Jordan. Where was he? I got up and started running again, this time, circling the house. I hated it. I was screaming his name, but all that was coming out of my mouth was air. He wouldn’t be able to hear me to shout and answer back.

I heard James behind me shouting his name like I couldn’t, and then I felt arms come around my waist and latch on. “You can’t go in, Pea. The fire’s too out of control. We’ll find him.” Toby kept trying to reassure me, but nothing was sinking in. I unwound his arms from me and grabbed his hand to let him know that I wasn’t trying to get away. I dragged him with me the rest of the way around the house, and that’s where I found my brother. I looked around and saw Ja mes coming from the other side o f the house.

I ran to Jordan and jumped in his arms and started sobbing. I faintly heard James fussing at Jordan about some thing, but the fire was so loud, and my heart was pounding so loudly in my chest, I couldn’t differentiate what was being said by whom. Jordan just kept holding me, rubbing my back in reassurance that he was okay.

When I finally calmed down enough, I let go of the death hold I had around Jordan’s neck, and backed up to get a good look at him. He was covered in soot from the fire, but I didn’t see anything wrong, and he wasn’t acting like he was in pain, so I assumed he was alright, but I had to check just to make sure. I ran my hands down his arms, and his chest. He didn’t flinch, so I figured he was not burned anywhere.

‘Are you alright? You weren’t caught in the fire?’ I asked using the sign language. I was shaking so bad I don’t know how he under stood what I was asking, but he answered.

“I’m fine, Sis. I was in there, but when I smelled gas I bolted . Right as I got to the great room is when the back of the house blew. I called James and then the fire department. They should be here any minute.” He said. He still had his arms around me. I guessed he knew how much I just needed to be assured of him being alright.

We heard the sirens from the police and fire trucks just a moment later. I finally looked back at what used to be my house, and I swore that I would not let that asshole this close to my family again. Before it was just me, and I was scared, but now he had ruined my home and almost killed my brother. I was pissed and there was going to hell to pay.

******************************************************************************

Later that evening, after we’d filed the police report and talked to the investigators, we all congregated in the study to discuss what happened and what to do about it.

“The house had been broken into. I don’t know why my alarms on my mobile didn’t alert me, but when I got in the house, I went straight for my office to get what I needed and saw the alerts on my screen.” Jordan was explaining what happened when he’d gone back to our house. “Luckily, the first thing I did was to send all videos to an off site server I have set up for my business. I automatically do that with anything of importance. Now we can look and investigate while the police do the same. I promised to have Ricky send them a copy.” Ricky was another tech geek like Jordan that helped him with his business from his home. He was the one that did most of the traveling that needed to be done, going out to the clients and such.

“I have a couple of guys on the way here,” Troy said. “They should be here tomorrow. They’re the best on recon and fact finding, and are going to help us find this bastard. He obviously hasn’t gone far .”

“Yeah, same here.” Toby added in. “My whole team volunteered to come help out, so I have six guys coming. They’ll be staking out the land around here, setting traps and such. I’m hoping that we’ll be able to get Beckham before he strikes again.”

I sat there and zoned out. I was so tired of this man affecting my life. He wasn’t just messing with me anymore; he was messing with my family. I knew the fire for what it was; a warning. He’d kill anyone he had to to get me back. Like he carved into my skin; I was his ‘private property’, but I wouldn’t give in without a fight. When he first started sending the letters threatening my brothers, I had almost decided to go to him and give up. I didn’t want my family hurt because of me, but I’d realized that I would hurt them more by giving in. They would blame themselves, and I wouldn’t let that happen.

I was sitting beside Jordan because my nerves were still raw where I’d been scared for him. I turned to him and tapped his knee to get his attention.

‘I want to start my target practice again.’ I said when he looked at me. ‘I would also like to learn some self-defense.’

“I’d be happy to start training you with a gun again , but I don’t know anything about self-defense.” He said. “I can hold my own in a fight, but you know I have never done any real fighting.”

“She can train with me in that.” Tory said. “I was telling Troy that it would help me get some of my strength back if we started working out and training every day. We can even help her do the practice with the gun if you wouldn’t mind.” He directed to Jordan. I knew he didn’t want him to think he was pushing him to the side.

“That would be great. I want to ride with James every day and work from his office. I don’t think any of us should go anywhere alone for a while. I know I shouldn’t have stayed at our house alone, earlier, but I wasn’t thinking about that. I just wanted to get the security tightened up.”

The trips all shared a look before turning back to Jordan. “We’re going to be setting up a security firm with the guys coming in working for us. We will hire out to do some mercenary work and stuff like that, too, but we need some good tech people for the security aspect of it.” Toby offered. “You’d be able to keep your business and we could just contract your help.”

Jordan looked at me and then James, I guess to gage our reactions, but I thought it would be a good idea. I didn’t like to think of the trips becoming mercenaries, but I’d talk to them about it later .

“Security is what I mostly deal with now anyway, so I’d have no problem contracting with y’all, but I won’t have anything to do with mercenary work. I don’t want to be associated with that.” I guess he had been thinking the same thing as me. “I thought y’all were just going to keep runnin’ the ranch? Are you giving up on that?”

“We’ll still be doing the ranching; this other will be on the side. The mercenary business is not what you think.” Troy said, sounding offended. “We’d be sent out ‘unofficially’ by the government for search and rescue missions that are not approved by official channels for political or tactical reasons. When shit like that happens, the forces want their men back, so they hire outside help that will not be linked back to the government. It gives them plausible deniability.”

‘I don’t like that.’ I signed. ‘That sounds like if you’re caught, they would leave you there to hang .’

“That’s a risk, Princess, but if not for teams like this, a lot of the POWs would never get rescued. We would never all leave you at the same time…” Tory saw my face when he said that and realized he’d messed up.

‘So you think I’d say “sure go on Tory because I have two backups”? Is that what you think I think of all of you?’

“Now that’s not what he meant, Pea, and you know it.” Toby said sternly, but when I turned to glare at him, he shrank back into his seat.

‘We will be talking about this later, but now is not the time.’ I huffed out my breath as I signed this. I waited all of these years for them to finish their military careers, to have them all injured in some way and sent home, just to have them go back without the military to back them up? I so didn’t think so. I would not do the waiting at home for the phone call to tell me that one of them didn’t make it. Been there, done that, not doing it again. I had just now finally got them all back. If they left me again, that was breaking the promise Toby made when he first came home.

“I want to move back into my room.” Tory said out of the blue. “Let’s get this stupid bed out of here. I want things to go back to normal.”

“Nah, man. Give it a week or two.” Troy answered. “Let’s work out like we talked about, get you back up to par.”

“Yeah, I agree with him, you can’t be making all of those trips up and down the stairs every day right now.” Toby added.

“I’m not a damned invalid. I can get up on my own two feet; I don’t need all of this.”

I got up, walked over to the bed and got up in it with him. I sat facing him. ‘You are getting stronger, but you just woke up. Give yourself time to get better, or you’ll just strain yourself and end up worse. I’ll be with you, and if it’s alright with your brothers, we’ll start training tomorrow.’

I knew he’d been upset that he couldn’t go with us when the fire happened earlier, and embarrassed that Toby had told Troy to stay with him. He didn’t want to think he needed a keeper. He had only brought it up to change the subject and try to get me to forget, but he was truly upset over it. I thought about it while I went to my room.

I took a shower, changed into my night clothes, and went back downstairs to the study. I think me sleeping with him every night was helping him as much as it was me. Toby and Troy always stayed in there with us, taking turn sleeping on the couch and floor. I was praying that it was a good sign for the future.

I couldn’t wait for the next day. I would finally be taking a step to getting my old life back, and I’d be able to help defend my family at the same time.

Chapter 18

I don’t know how long I stood there and stared at the remains of my house. I had come after a morning workout with the trips. Tory had overdone himself, so he was out of commission on bed rest for the rest of the day.

As I stood there, I remembered my dad. He had lost himself when my mother died, but it healed him in a way. He had been an alcoholic before. It was the main bone of contention between my parents. He didn’t work or contribute to the household. She had provided everything for all of us with her disability check. She struggled, but she never let us want for anything. Daddy felt bad after she died, knowing he could have done more, and showed her how much she meant to him. He was too late to be able to do that, and it almost drove him to suicide, but he decided to sober up and take care of us like he should have been doing the whole time. All of my mother’s things that my father and I had kept over the years, and all of his things that I couldn’t part with, were gone. All of that was stuff that could never be replaced. Blain had taken so much from me, my virginity , my freedom, my piece of mind, and now my home with all of my worldly possessions with the exception of some clothes, my keyboard, and my bracelet that I never take off. All I have left are my brothers and the trips, and I would not lose them. It was time I stood up for myself and fought back.

Toby, who had come with me, came up behind me and slid his arms around my waist, bending down to rest his chin on my shoulder. “It’s going to be alright, Pea. We are going to make sure nothing else happens.”

I turned to him. ‘I was just thinking of all that man has taken from me,’ I signed. ‘But hearing and looking at you, I realize that though I can’t get most of that back, there are things, or people I guess I should say, who are more important. Material things can be replaced. I’ll always have the mem ories of my parents, even if I don’t have their possessions in front of me . I will get my piece of mind back, eventually, but you guys and my brothers can’t be replaced, so I need to be thankful. I’m going to throw myself into the training, and maybe I’ll be able to protect all of you from the monster I brought into our lives.’

“If any of us can help it, you won’t have to worry about it.” He said. “I can’t promise because anything can happen, as it did here, but we will all do everything in our power to make sure Beckham never steps foot near you again.”

‘Train me up, Sargent, and we’ll protect each other.’

Toby just smiled and kissed me.

******************************************************************************

For the next week, we trained every day. Tory was slowly but surely regaining his strength and stamina. He didn’t try to take too much on after that first day. He had had to sit out the next day also because of it, so he didn’t want a repeat of that. We worked out first thing in the morning, followed by breakfast, and then shooting practice. I never liked guns, and still didn’t, but I was good at it. After two days, I was hitting everything I aimed for. Troy gave me one of his guns the day before telling me to keep it on me at all times. He’d been the main one working with me on shooting.

“We’ll still practice with guns a little every day, but I want you to start working with knives too. I think Toby is the best one to show you that, but I want it to happen. Something always could happen that you won’t be able to use your gun, so I want you trained up on a couple of different weapons, and we’re going to go through the house and I want you to point out to me what you think can be used as a weapon if nothing else is available , and I’ll be able to triple what you point out.” I just nodded. I didn’t doubt it at all.

I had met all of the guys that Toby and Troy had brought in, and they all looked deadly in their own way. I had been working with a guy named Luke, who had explained that he really wanted to help because he had lost his cousin, who was like a sister to him, to an abusive boyfriend, and he hated that he hadn’t been able to help her. He hadn’t even known anything was going on until it was too late, she hid it so well.

We headed in for lunch, and the kitchen was full of men. It looked like they had been having a meeting. All of the talking stopped when Troy and I entered, so I knew it had to be about me or our situation.

‘What are you talking about?’ I directed toward Toby and Tory.

Toby looked at a man he called Stokes. “She wants to know what we were saying. Tell her what you found.”

Stokes turned to me and looked at me in sympathy. “Well, ma’am, Fosters and I extended our parameters during our patrol this morning, and we found a campsite right outside your property lines.” He said and looked over to the other man he’s been with, who started speaking.

“I did a search of the tent, and found some items that you’ll have to confirm, but I believe they are yours.” Fosters said. “We also found quite a few pictures of you, your brothers, Sarg and his brothers. I’m assuming it belongs to Beckham, and he’s been watching you for a while , but the most recent picture is of your shooting practice four days ago .”

I stood there in shock. Even with all of the people here and the new security measures we had, he was still able to get close enough to be watching us. How the hell was that possible? I wouldn’t be able to defend myself against someone like that. We had some of the most well trained men here, and he got past them.

I wouldn’t let it stop me. I would just have to step up training. ‘Ask Luke if he’s ready to come outside with me. I need to learn to fight. No more of the self-defense; I want actual fighting.’ One of the bad things about being around these strangers is that only one out of the bunch could speak ASL, and that was a man named Woods, and he was never around, so I had to have one of the trips speak for me unless I had time to sit with my keyboard. Of course I never had time for that. Woods had set up a sort of base camp type thingy in the storage building in my back yard. They wanted someone on each property at all times.

“You need to eat first, Princess.” Tory said, coming my way with a sandwich and some chips on a plate for me. “You’ll need the fuel.”

I sat down and concentrated on eating, not wanting to make myself sick, but trying to hurry so I could get started. As I was rinsing my plate to put in the dishwasher, Toby’s phone rang. I had gone to Luke and tapped his shoulder, to let him know I was ready, but Toby stopped me.

“And you’ve tried all the other numbers you have for her? Her parents or any friends?” He said into the phone. He listened to the reply and asked “So what’s your plans?” He nodded. At whatever the answer was. “Alright, I’ll see you in a few.” He said and hung up. He looked straight to me. “James can’t reach Shelby.”

‘She’s not in class?’ I asked. I knew the answer, but I wasn’t thinking properly.

Toby shook his head. “No, and neither her parents nor her roommate have heard from her since yesterday afternoon.”

There had to be some other explanation. It couldn’t be Blain. Why would he go for Shelby? How would he even have fou nd her? We’d told her not to come ever since I ’d found the note. I didn’t want to put her at risk ; she was like a sister to me.

It had been four days since the last photo of me, so he could be anywhere, doing anything.

******************************************************************************

It was seven that evening and I was still in the home gym working with the fighting mannequin. James and Jordan had left for New York along with a couple of Toby’s men, Bradley and Melbo u rne. They were going to try to find Shelby, though they had no clear idea how. Her parents had gone to the police, but they had been told that the person had to missing for forty -eight hours before they could be reported missing. James was taking a copy of the reports from here, and he was going to explain the situation with Blain. He was hoping they would help search or put out an APB for her and Blain, once they’d seen that there was motive for a kidnapping. Jordan had just called Troy to let us know they had made it alright, and one of them would call hourly to touch base and keep us updated.

I had been in the gym all afternoon. Luke had shown me how to use the mannequin for practicing my defensive moves while turning it into an offensive move.

“When someone comes to grab you from behind, the first thing they are going try to do is immobilize your arms. They’ll grab you like this,” His arms went around me, pinning my arms to my side. “So you have to use your lower half. Take your strongest foot and…”

I didn’t wait; I just stomped on his foot as hard as I could with all of my weight. As stupid as it sounds, I had seen it on a movie so I thought it would work.

He grunted, so I knew I’d hurt him, but his hold on me never faltered. “As I was saying, that move might hurt, but it’s not bad enough to make your attacker let you go. You’ll have to kick him in the kneecap as hard you can. The pain in that is so intense, it’ll take his leg out and make him let go of you. You then want to elbow your attacker in the ribs if he’s standing or in the back if he’s bent over. We’ll take the scenario to where he was left standing.” He said and I worked with him in slow motion a couple of times, before he left for a patrol, moving me back to the mannequin for real time, strengthening practice.

My body was getting so worn out, but with the adrenaline running through my system, I didn’t really notice. I was putting everything I had into the punches and kicks I was throwing. I was imagining Blain being the dummy I was punching. I was finally able to let loose ; all of the pent up feelings and emotions I had been hiding from everyone. The feeling of never being clean again. I still to that day scrubbed my body every time I took a shower. I could still feel his hands on me, and all of the ‘toys’ he’d use d . The sense of violation had never gone away, but at least being with the triplets made me feel like I was still worth something. I had been so angry the whole time I’d been taken, but quickly learned to hide it after a few of his punishments. I was so angry at myself for not getting away, or fighting back, despite the punishments. I felt like if I had tried harder to fight back, it wouldn’t have happened. Self-loathing. That was the word I wanted. That was what I felt toward myself, and that made me angrier. I punched harder and harder, letting it all out until I finally collapsed. I couldn’t move after that, and I broke. I sobbed harder than I ever had. I allowed myself to grieve for all I had lost to that man, and now , I knew he had Shelby. I couldn’t stand the thought that what was done to me, was probably now being done to someone else because of me.

I heard footsteps coming up to me, and then a familiar set of arms enveloped me, rocking me, just holding me allowing me to let it all out. I heard him call for the other two, and a minute later, I was surrounded by all three of my angels.

And they were angels. They had saved me when I first moved here after my mom died. I had been depressed, though my dad and my brothers had tried their hardest to lift my spirits. My mom had been the only one who, at the time, understood me and never judged me. That was until the trips found me by the creek that day and accepted me. It hadn’t mattered that I was chubby. When everyone at school would make fun of ‘the fat girl’, the trips would stand by my brothers to take up for me, and would always find a way to make me feel better.

Now they were picking up pieces of me again, and slowly putting me back together. They just sat on the gym floor holding me, not saying anything, just giving me their support. Finally Toby stood up with me still cradled in his arms. He noticed the grimace of pain that crossed my face, and they all immediately started checking me for injuries. I of course didn’t have any except swollen knuckles. When Tory straightened one of my legs, pain shot up my spine. My muscles were so tensed that it was hurting just to have them touching me.

Troy figured it out I guess, and walked away saying something about running a hot bath for me. That being said, the other two caught on and started in on me about pushing myself beyond my limits as Toby carried me up the stairs to his bedroom. Well it had been all of ours for the past couple of nights. His bedroom was the only one with an extra-large double bed , basically the size of two full size beds put together and was extra-long; that could fit all of us in it comfortably. We hadn’t made love again since the fire. They would just hold me until I fell asleep; Toby on my right, Troy on my left, and Tory sleeping in between my legs, pillowing his head on my stomach. They had been showering me with more tenderness and love than I had ever felt before, and they made me feel like everything would be alright.

As we entered the room and headed for the bathroom, we could hear Troy’s phone ringing.

“Hello?”

Troy had the phone to his ear as he was pouring Epsom Salt into the steamy bathwater. He turned to watch as Tory undressed me, while I was still in Toby’s arms, getting me ready to soak in the hot bath.

“So what are they going to do?”

I couldn’t take my eyes off of him as he listened to whatever was being said. I was hoping that maybe I could determine if it was good news or bad by the look on his face, but his expression never changed.

“Alright, keep up with the hourly checkins. I think Marti will feel better to know that her brothers are okay, and let us know as soon as you find out anything with Shelby.” He nodded at whatever was said. “I’ll tell her. Y’all be careful up there and watch each other’s backs. The four of you stay together and you’ll have a better chance.”

He turned back to shut off the water.

“Yeah. Talk to you in an hour.” And he hung up the phone.

Toby lowered me into the water as I waited for Troy to tell us what was said. Tory came in with a towel and three washcloths. The tension in my body started to melt away as they all washed different parts of my body in tender, soothing way. Toby started at my feet and worked up, Tory was taking care of my torso, and Troy was doing my back as he explained what was said in the phone call.

“They went straight to the police station. They weren’t going to do anything, even with the reports, still siting the forty-eight hour rule, until Melbo u rne recognized one of the detectives as an ex Ranger. Said his name was Neil Thompson, I don’t know if you know him, but Melbourne was able to explain the situation to the detective and he said he would take the case personally. Thompson even went to talk with his chief, who was also an ex Ranger , and got the go ahead.”

“Yeah, I know Thompson. We all trained together at Ranger camp. We passed at the same time, but he was on a different team.” Toby explained.

“That’s good, because now he’s sending out an APB with pictures of both Shelby and Beckham to the entire state. He listed Beckham as armed and dangerous; to follow only until they call it in and back-up arrives. So hopefully it won’t be long now.”

I let out a sigh of relief. At least Shelby had hope; she had a lot of people looking for her. Of course I did too, but I was still holding out hope for her. It was all I could do to be able to stay sane.

The trips dried me off and laid me down in bed, surrounding me on all sides. I felt so relaxed and calm after the bath, I was having trouble keeping my eyes open anymore.

“I promise to wake you if there’s any news.” Troy said.

I slept fitfully, not really being able to clear my mind enough for a deep sleep. I heard the phone ring every hour for four hours, but then they stopped. The lack of phone calls had us all awake and nervous. I had a gut feeling like something bad had happened . Neither Jordan nor James would leave me hanging like this, and I didn’t think Toby’s men would either.

We finally received a phone call at eight thirty the next morning. All the men were patrolling the area just in case we were wrong that Beckham had gone up north, so it was so quiet in the house, we heard Jordan’s voice on the line. His voice was dry and cracked.

“Let me talk to Marti.”

Chapter 19

I tapped the phone when Troy handed it to me to let Jordan know I was there.

“Sis, I need you to go to another room. I need to speak with you alone.” He said in the same cracked voice.

I hated it because I couldn’t ask him anything; like what was going on, or what was wrong with him. I had butterflies swarming in my stomach, telling me something was seriously wrong. I just didn’t realize how right I’d be.

I went into the bathroom, shut the door, and locked it. When I tapped again to let him know, he started talking.

“James, Shelby, and I are alright, Sis, but Bradley and Melbourne were shot. I don’t know if they are alive. Beckham has us and he wants you to come in exchange for us , but don’t come. We’ll be…” I heard him grunt as if someone had hit him. Tears leaked out of my eyes, knowing some of what my family was having to go through because of me.

“Hello, Pet. It’s been too long, and it’s time you come home to me.” Shivers shot down my spine at hearing the voice of my nightmares. “Do something and let me know you are with me, Kayla.”

I tapped the phone as I had done with Jordan.

“Good. Now listen carefully. I have bought you a bus ticket that leaves from the Greyhound Depot on Hwy 21. It will be leaving at one o’clock in the morning . Are you getting this?”

Again I tapped to show I was listening. “Alright, then. I’ll be picking you up somewhere along the way, but I won’t tell you where. You come alone. If I see that you have anyone with you, your family is dead. Even if I’m not with them, someone will be watching and will do what’s needed if I make that call. I ’m giving you plenty of time to be able to find a way of getting those freaks of nature off of your tail. Don’t disappoint me, Pet. I’ll have your brother’s phone until I pick you up, so find a way to call me if anything comes up.”

I tapped to say I understood and then hung the phone up. I was crying again, so I needed to figure out what to tell the trips. They would know something was up just by looking at me. I decided to tell them about Bradley and Melbourne, which was part of the truth, but I still needed to think of how to get away from them tonight. Then an idea hit me. They would hate me afterward, but it had to be done to save my brothers and Shelby from Blain’s torture.

I walked out of the bathroom just to have the guys close in on me.

“What’s going on?”, “Why did he have to talk to you alone?”, “Why are you crying?” Toby, Troy , and Tory all asked at the same time.

I looked at Toby, knowing he would blame himself for what happened to his friends, even though it wasn’t his fault. ‘Your men have both been shot.’ I signed.

“Are they going to be okay?” He asked immediately.

Damn, I hadn’t thought that through. I was going to have to lie to him, and one thing I couldn’t stand is lying. He was going to hate me even more once he found out.

‘He didn’t know. They chased after Blain when it happened, and when they went back, the men weren’t there.’

“DAMN IT!! How could they just leave them there?! You’re NEVER supposed to leave a man behind!!!” He ranted as he paced around the room.

I started crying again because now I was causing Toby to be mad at my brothers for something they didn’t do. I really hated myself at that moment. I went over to him and put a hand on his arm, and was relieved when he didn’t jerk away.

‘I’m sorry. They were trying to find Shelby and weren’t thinking .’

“No Pea, I’m sorry. I know they’re doing the best they can. If it were you, I’d probably have done same thing, and I was trained to never leave a man behind; your brothers weren’t.” He said and took me in his arms, squeezing me for a moment and kissing my forehead before letting me go.

“Come on, Cupcake…” Troy said.

“Let us fix you something. You haven’t eaten yet.” Tory finished.

They each put an arm around me and led me out of the room, leaving Toby alone to deal with what had happened. I looked back and saw him sitting down on the side of the bed. He put his head in his hands, and I felt like a monster. All of this was my fault.

The guys fixed me a brunch of scrambled egg and bacon sandwiches. Woods and Luke were the ones cooking. The others came in in pairs to eat; always leaving a pair outside on patrol. Toby had come in in the middle of us eating and broken the news about Bradley and Melbourne. After that, Woods and Luke both kept glancing my way, as if trying to figure something out.

All I could think about is what I needed to do, and hating the fact that I was going to do it. I was about to lose three of the most important people of my life, to save the other three, but at least they would all be alive.

“It’s going to be alright, Princess.” Tory said. “Look at all we’ve been through, and we’re all still here. Shelby will be okay.”

I nodded. ‘I know. I just really need to get my mind off of things right now.’ I looked at all three of them and another tear rolled down my cheek. It felt like all I did anymore was cry. ‘I don’t know how much more I can take.’

I knew I was being selfish, but I really needed one more day with these men to be able to see me through everything I had to do, and everything that would be done to me.

Troy came over to me and picked me up from the chair. I put my arms around his neck, and my legs lifted to wrap around his waist. We stared into each other’s eyes as he carried me back up the stairs, not even watching where he was going, but getting us there flawlessly. He went down on the bed, keeping his weight above me, and bent down to kiss me. His kiss was desperate and passionate, like he needed it as much as I did. I felt the bed dip on either side of me, but couldn’t take my attention away from Troy and the kiss.

I felt hands start roaming my body, and it took a moment to realize that they were removing my clothes, I was too caught up in the sensations they leaving in their wake. Somehow without even breaking my kiss with Troy, they managed to get me naked. Finally, Troy pulled slowly away, both of us breathless, and he stood up to undress himself. That’s when I looked at the other two and realized they had already taken everything off except their boxers.

Toby bent down to take my mouth, and he mastered me with his kiss. His tongue wrestled for dominance with mine and I relinquished it without a fight. I felt Tory kiss down my torso, dipping his tongue in my belly for a taste before going lower. When he reached my clit , my body ignited. Troy had joined us back on the bed and had taken one breast in his mouth while pinching the nipple of the other and rolling it with his talented fingers. I reached for Toby’s cock, almost choking when I felt the hard length of it through his boxers . How was that ever going to fit in my body?

He must’ve felt me tense. He leaned up and looked into my eyes with so much heat and love. “I promise that we will not hurt you.”

I knew that. These men would do everything in their power to keep me from getting hurt. I reached in and pulled his steel rod out, rubbing up and down, feeling all of its contours. I thumbed the slit up top the same time that Troy nicked my nipple with his teeth, and Tory sucked my clit, making him feel some of the ecstasy I was feeling at the moment. I pulled Toby up toward me by his cock; letting him know the only way I could at the moment that I wanted to taste him.

He moaned and moved up to give my mouth easy access to his weeping length . I flicked my tongue across the top, and his sweet tangy taste exploded in my mouth. I sucked the length of him as far as I could before he tapped the back of my throat. He grunted, and I thought I had done something wrong , having never done this before, but Toby threaded his fingers into my hair, gently rubbing my scalp .

“NO!! Oh, damn baby, Please don’t stop. I’m just having trouble holdin’ off, and I don’t want this to end this way.”

I heard Troy and Tory chuckle, and I smiled around his cock. I was happy that I was able to affect him that way.

Tory had been sticking his tongue in and out of my channel. When he switched and flicked my clit, I climaxed with a feeling of flying. Before I had the chance to come back down, He was up and entered me with a strong thrust, bumping my cervix, setting off another orgasm.

Troy had just been watching, seemingly enjoying the show. “Damn, honey you are so beautiful.” He said, pinching my nipples again. I was still sucking on Toby like he was the best popsicle I’d ever tasted, while Tory plowed into m e with long, hard, even strokes. I wanted it harder and took my mouth off Toby long enough to try to convey that to Tory with a look . He must have understood, because his movements gained both speed and strength. I went back to Toby, starting back where I ’d left off.

I could feel the climax building again, and as I exploded, my channel expanding and contracting in orgasm, I heard Tory yell my name as I took him with me. He soon pulled out, kissing me in the bend of my neck, and next thing I know I was being pulled away from Toby long enough to flip me over to my stomach.

I took Toby back in my mouth, determined not to let him hold anything back from me, when I felt Troy enter me from behind, hitting a spot inside that I didn’t know existed. He took me just as fast and hard a s Tory had, shaping himself to m y back and kissing my shoulder blade and upper back , fondling my breasts . Toby held my head in place as both his and Troy’s strokes became erratic, and as Tro y hit that sweet spot inside me again, I climaxed harder than I had all day , which I didn’t think was possible, and that sent both Toby and Tro y over with me, both of them screaming my name.

We all collapsed together, breathing heavily. Tory, who had stayed in the background watching, came over with a warm wet cloth to clean me, and then got in the bed with us. We laid there together for a while and dozed before I knew I had to get up and get dressed.

“Where are you going, Princess?” Tory asked.

‘I’m going to take a shower and then go cook our dinner.’ I signed, smiling bigger than I had in a long time. I grabbed my clothes and went into the bathroom, locking the door behind me. The smile fell from my face as soon as the door was closed. I hated this next part, but it had to be done. The trips would never allow me to leave .

I took a quick hot shower, soothing some of the muscles the boys had worked so hard. I knew I would never forget the beautiful gift they gave me to day . It would certainly help me get through whatever Blain had planned for me.

After I had dried off and gotten dressed, I opened the medicine cabinet and took several of my sleeping pills from the bottle, slipping them in my pocket. I took a deep fortifying breath and let it out, and then headed down to make supper for my guys.

Chapter 20

I cooked one of my mother’s recipes that she had gotten from her father, called Mommy Goulash. I think he had named it that because he couldn’t think of a better one. It was a very simple and quick dish, and I knew everyone who tasted it usually loved it. It was one of the trips’ favorites.

I felt a set of arms wrap around my waist. “Can I help?” Toby asked with his voice sounding all husky. I knew he still had other things on his mind.

I shook my head, holding my hands up, and then picking the spoon back up to stir the meat that would go on top of the rice. He actually understood what that movement meant.

“I know how I’d like to keep my hands busy,” He said sending shivers up my spine and goose bumps on my arms. “But I guess I’ll join the others in the living room.” He kissed the bend in my neck, and then walked out.

I let out a breath I hadn’t realized I’d been holding. I had to do this, and I wouldn’t be able to if someone was in here with me. A few minutes later I got bowls down to fix for the guys, and after filling them, I added the sleeping pills I had crushed to the three bowls the trips would eat from; mixing it up in the Goulash.

I took the bowls to the living room where all of the guys who weren’t on patrol were sitting, watching a Lingerie Football game. I gave them the bowls, shaking my head at the fact that someone had come up with the idea of women playing football half naked, and that some women had actually agreed to do it . Whatever had happened to equality amongst the sexes?

I sat in the room with the guys to eat after I served all of the men. I was so nervous. The pills usually took thirty minutes to an hour to work on me, but that was me taking them like they were meant to be taken. I was so scared that they’d just fall over to the side like in a cartoon.

I caught Woods watching me several times during the meal, which made my nerves even worse. I didn’t know why he was still there. He was supposed to be in the shed keeping an eye on the cameras.

I did a couple very convincing fake yawns, and sure enough, Tory suggested that we all go to bed early since we were all getting tired. When we all got into the room, I had three sets of hands helping me remove my clothes, and then they stood back to just look at me. I tried to cover myself best as I could with my arms, but Tory came up, grabbing my arms and settling them back at my sides.

“Never hide your body in front of us. You are so beautiful, we can’t help but to look at you.”

Tears welled in my eyes when he said that, but I blinked them back. I wouldn’t let these last moments together be tainted with tears. I had already tainted them with betrayal.

‘I love you.’ I signed as they started undressing themselves.

Guilt was gnawing at me because I could see the tiredness and stress in their eyes, but they were still going to take the time to be with me, and so help me, I was going to take it.

I walked over to Tory, who was already down to his boxers, and dropped to my knees before him. I looked up into his eyes as I ran my hands softly up his legs and into his boxers. The heat and love I could see in them melted me from the inside out. I slowly lowered the boxers , exposing his engorged shaft right in front of my mouth, like it was aiming for its goal, and I ran my tongue along the vein on the bottom of it , causing him to jerk forward and hiss his pleasure. I grabbed him by the cheeks of his perfectly formed butt and drew him closer to me, so I could take his sac into my mouth, gently rolling them with my tongue.

He let out a shout and backed up a step. “You keep doing that Princess, and I’ll be finished before I start.”

I smiled up at him, happy that I could please him enough to make him lose control. He had done wonders to me earlier. And to think, neither of us had experience, so in truth, we were acclimating ourselves to each other.

I pulled him back to me, and took his length into my mouth, sucking it until it hit the back of my throat, and then I swallowed around it to avoid my gag reflex . Tory moaned as I did that, and threaded his hands gently in my hair, holding me in place as he started to thrust slowly in and out of my mouth.

A moment later, he growled, pulled out, and picked me up to carry me to the bed where Toby and Troy waited naked. Tory placed me to where I was straddling Toby’s face, and joined me at the head of the bed, sliding his cock back into my mouth. Toby ran his tongue along my slit before he started thrusting it in and out of my pulsing channel.

He moved his mouth up to my aching clit, scraping lightly with his teeth, sending me over into an explosive orgasm. I screamed my pleasure around the slightly pulsing cock in my mouth, sending Tory over and his delicious release hit the back of my throat. I swallowed it all down hungrily, still sucking on his cock until he pulled from my mouth causing a ‘pop’ sound.

Troy grabbed me by the hips sliding me back, lining my entrance with Toby’s engorged member. I lowered myself slowly onto him, the walls of my vagina still squeezing and pulsing from my climax, sending me straight into another orgasm. I thought I would pass out from all the pleasure that was leaving me weak, until I felt Troy’s lubricated fingers pushing gently against my back passage. I felt a slight pain that quickly morphed to pleasure the more he thrust and scissored his fingers stretching me, getting me ready to take him.

“Just relax and push out. This is going to feel amazing.” He whispered after a moment.

He pushed me between my shoulder blades causing me to lie flat against Toby. I started kissing him in earnest, nervous about taking both of them at the same time. Toby stopped his thrusting, holding me in his arms to keep me still while Troy entered me slowly from behind. I felt the small pinching pain, but it wasn’t like it was before and still swiftly turned into pleasure like I’d never imagined possible. Both Toby and Troy groaned in pleasure themselves as Troy seated himself in me to the hilt. The y started moving, slowly at first, on e sliding in as the other slid out and vice versa. I was lost in a fog of ecstasy. Tory turned my head to him and started kissing me like I was the most precious jewel. They increased their speed and rhythm, and I could tell they were getting close. I felt Tory’s hand slide in between me and Toby , and pinched my clit, sending my into another orgasm, which in turn sent Toby and Troy over as well.

“God, I love you, Pea.” I heard Toby pant while Troy and Tory stated their agreements.

Tory lifted me from between them and lay me down gently as he covered me body with his. He kissed me so tenderly that I felt tears well behind my closed eyelids. Entering me slowly, he set a sweet pace; taking his time to make love to me. He finally backed up to his knees giving Toby and Troy room to each take a breast into their mouth and suckle it.

As Tory started rubbing my clit with his thumb, both of the others scraped and nibbled my nipples with their teeth sending me into yet another climax , my vagina squeezing and coaxing Tory over with me . I had lost count of how many times they had made me come that day. I didn’t know it was possible for one person to experience so much, but the trips were proving themselves to the task of showing their love for me. I wish I could do that for them, and vowed to do so in the future if they ever gave me the opportunity again after this.

If I survived this.

We all lay there breathless for long moments until I heard the boys’ breathing even out, letting me know they had fallen asleep. Toby and Troy were on either side of me, and it took me several minute to be able to maneuve r my way out from between them. I had to roll Tory to the bottom, leaving all three triplets lying naked next to each other. I laughed silently thinking about how they would feel waking like that, but I sobered when I looked at the clock. It was eleven thirty and I needed to take a shower and get ready to leave.

After I showered and dressed in some jeans and a flannel button up, I decided I would write them a note. It was the least I could do. I went to the small desk Toby had in here, and sat down finding paper and a pen. I wrote: To all of you, the loves of my life,

I know you’ll be angry when you wake and find me gone, but I had to leave. I put sleeping pills in your dinners so that none of you would be able to stop me.

Blain has Jordan, James, and Shelby. They haven’t been harmed as of yet, but he will kill them if I don’t go with him. It’s the only way to save them and keep all of you safe.

Each of you own a piece of my heart, and just know that I’m leaving it with you when I go.

I’ll understand if you all hate me, and I’ll respect and honor whatever your wishes shall be if I am able to return.

I have to leave my bracelet with you guys, but Jordan has a way to find me by GPS, so I know that all of you can come and find me. I have faith in every one of you.

Always yours,

Marti

I put the note in between Toby’s and Tory’s heads, so it would be easily found once they woke up, and I headed down stairs.

As I grabbed the keys to Jordan’s car, since they had taken James’, a hand shot out to stop me while a figure walked in front of my path to block my exit. The one in front turned on the light, and I saw that it was Woods . Looking behind me, I saw that it had been Luke who had grabbed me.

“Where do you think you’re going?” Luke asked letting me go and going to stand beside Woods.

‘Blain has my brothers and Shelby. I have to save them. He’ll kill them if I don’t go, but he said they’d be set free if I did what he told me to.’ I signed to Woods who spoke the words so Luke would know what I was saying.

“You’re not going alone.” Luke said. “We are coming with you. Tell us everything.”

I told them about the conversation I had had with Blain earlier. I even told them what I’d done to the trips so I would be able to get away. They both laughed, but it was not a joyous sound.

“They are going to go ape-shit when they wake up to find you gone.” Woods said.

‘I left them a note, and Jordan will be able to track me when he gets to a computer, so you’ll be able to find me.’

“Yeah, but let’s hope it’s not too late when we do. And the guys will still be pissed.”

‘I know, but I didn’t have a choice; not if I wanted to keep everyone safe.’

“Well, call Beckham. I’ll tell him that we’re coming along only to collect the hostages.”

I ran upstairs to get Troy’s phone, that way Blain should know it was me calling. When I got it, I called Jordan’s phone and walked back downstairs while I waited for him to pick up.

“It’s twelve fifteen. I hope that you are on your way to the bus station.” Blain said, answering the phone.

I tapped to let him know it was me, but then handed the phone to Luke.

“This is Luke Rosenetti. I caught Marti trying to sneak out, and got her to tell me everything.” He said.

He listened for a second before speaking again. “We are not stopping her, but we do want to go to New York to collect Jordan, James, and Shelby. We’ll let her do what she needs to do.”, “Yes I understand.”, “My partner Woods.”, “Yes were headed there now.” He hung up.

“Alright, let’s go. He said we could escort you until it was time for you to leave, but we had better not get off of the bus until we got to New York, or he would kill you. He told me where to find the others.” Luke explained. “I really hope you know what you’re doing.”

‘So do I.’ I signed. I looked back at the ranch house one more time as we drove off, praying I would be able to see it , and those in it , again soon.

Chapter 21

It took us no time at all to get to the bus depot. We all headed inside to get our tickets, but when Luke asked for my ticket at the window, they didn’t have one in my name. The bus was there and getting ready to set off so I was going to buy a ticket, so as not to miss the bus, but Woods stopped me.

“Something is up. He wouldn’t have brought you here for no reason.” He told me and then turned to Luke. “Call him back and ask him what’s up.”

Luke called and was only on the phone for a minute before snapping his phone closed. “The asshole put it in the name of Mrs. Robinson.”

They went back to the window and retrieved my ticket and then bought theirs.

There were only three other people on the bus besides us. We sat in the next to last row; me on one side and Woods and Luke on the other.

I had been just staring out the window for a while, hearing the guys whispering, but not really paying attention to what they were saying , until Luke called my name.

“Are you sure about this, Marti?”

I shook my head. ‘No, but I have no choice.’

Woods spoke what I had signed, and then said himself that something felt wrong.

‘This whole thing is wrong, Woods. Blain is crazy. Whatever he has planned is nothing like what he told us. I’m just praying that my brothers and Shelby will still be alive when you get there. I can take anything he dishes out as long they are alive.’

“Did he give any indication of where he would pick you up?”

‘No, he wanted to make it more difficult for someone to be able to find me. With you two coming along, I’m sure he will have figured something out to be able to get me without interference.’ I looked over to Woods, and could tell he was trying to plan something out. I didn’t want that, because anything he did would endanger my family. ‘If everything goes as it should, Jordan knows how to track me and find me, but if something happens, tell the triplets that I have a GPS chip imbedded in my skin. Jordan’s codes to find me are in his fireproof lockbox in his closet. You can find me by using that.’

We stopped talking after that, but he and Luke kept whispering. I knew they would try to get everyone without having anyone get hurt, but you never knew what was in store when a crazy person was involved, and it would be too late for me to change my mind once he had me. I had to just go with it and pray for the best for my family.

Each stop we made I got more and more nervous. Woods and Luke would stay on the bus as I would get off, pretending to stretch my legs, pick up a snack and drink, or just use the restroom.

Finally in Charlottesville Virginia, I was approached, but not by whom I expected.

“Are you Mrs. Robinson?” A man in a white t shirt and jeans asked coming up from behind me. Looking at him, he didn’t seem like a mean or evil person.

I nodded warily.

“Mr. Robinson hired my taxi service to drive you to where he is. Do you have any bags?”

I shook my head. I knew he probably didn’t know sign language, so I didn’t bother trying to use it.

We got into a mini-van that had his company logo on it confirming that he was from an actual t axi company. He drove me for about forty five minutes before we came to a diner and pulled up beside a blue car sitting in the back of the lot.

The taxi driver got out and opened the door for me, so I got out looking for Blain. Instead a man with blond hair looking to be in his forties got out of the car and opened the passenger side door for me to get in.

This man just drove me, without speaking, for about another hour. By this point it was light outside. I had no clue what town, or state by this point, that we were in, but we finally pulled into a long driveway leading to a two story Victorian house. As the man was helping me out of the car, Blain came out of the house. I froze. I couldn’t move. Seeing his face again sent so many flashes through my mind I couldn’t breathe.

Blain came over, handing the man a stack of bills and put his arm around my waist like it was a normal occurrence. The man drove off in the blue car as Blain turned to me.

“I have missed you so much, Kayla.” He bent down to try to kiss me, but I turned my head so the kiss landed on my cheek.

“Don’t do this, Pet.” He said; his voice hardening. “This is supposed to be a happy reunion. I told you I was sorry for everything, but I made a mistake in leaving you. We belong together.”

Hearing this made me angry. How stupid could this man be to think that an apology would make up for all he had done to me.

‘You are crazy if you think I will willingly come to you.’ I told him using sharp gestures to emphasize my anger toward him. I didn’t care if he didn’t understand me. Though he was dragging me down, I would not go without a fight this time. I would not give up because I knew that I had people who loved me that would never give up until they found me. ‘The only reason I returned was to save my family. I will never give myself to you. I will definitely never love you.’

He shook his head sadly. He seemed to have sincere regret in his eyes. “I think that is one of the things I’m the most sorry for. I will miss your beautiful voice crying out as I pleasure you in the playroom. I haven’t learned sign language yet, but I will. I’ll do that for you, Kayla.”

He seriously thought I enjoyed the things he did to me. I didn’t really realize it until that moment. He was so completely deluded ; in his own made up world in his mind.

I don’t know what reaction he wanted from me, maybe gratitude for being flattered, but whatever he wanted , I obviously didn’t give it to him. He got angry, grabbed my arm, and started to drag me into the house.

“I was truly hoping you wouldn’t be difficult, but I brought some insurance to help me gain your compliance, Kayla.” He said as he led me to the stairs leading down to what I guess was the playroom in the basement.

I had gotten to where I really hated my middle name. People stopped calling me Kayla after my mom died because it made me too sad. She had told me how special that name was to her, but Blain tainted that. Mom had chosen that name for a girl when she was just a little girl herself. Blain had told me the Marti was a boy’s name, so he called me Kayla. It was just another one of the reasons I was never completely comfortable around him.

When we got into the basement, I wanted to scream. I couldn’t hold back the tears from seeing one of the people I did all of this to protect.

“I’m sorry, Sis.” Jordan’s voice croaked. He was sitting in a chair, his hands and feet tied to it so tightly it looked like his fingers were turning purple. He had a black eye and a busted lip. And that was just the things I could see.

I shook my head letting him know I didn’t blame him. Blain had let go of my arm and watching the interaction between Jordan and I. I ran over to him, falling on my knees, and hugging his legs as I buried my face and sobbed into them. Blain had me and he knew it. I would never try to escape as long as he had my brother.

I stood up, wiped my eyes, and looked around the room. It was just like the other one he had kept me in with the St. Andrews cross, a table that resembled the GYN doctor’s table, and an implement that looked like a wooden horse. I knew from previous experience what each was used for. There was an old fashion wardrobe against the wall that I assumed held all of his ‘toys’, whips, and paddles. There were mirrors on all of the walls. He liked to watch my reactions to everything, and he needed the mirrors for when he was standing behind me.

There was a door on one of the walls. I walked to it hoping it was a bathroom so I could fix Jordan a drink of water. By the sound of his voice, he hadn’t had anything for a while. Sure enough it was. It was done in all black tile and the sink, toilet, and tub were all black. I used the rinsing glass to fix Jordan some cold water and took it back to him, holding it for him to sip from since his hands were tied. He had dark circles under his eyes. I hated myself for this happening to him. I hated Blain now more than I ever had for doing all of this to him.

He must have seen the hatred in my eyes, because he came and knocked the glass from my hand, and grabbed my arm to move me, but I jerked away from him.

‘At least loosen the ropes enough to give him circulation.’ I signed.

Jordan translated for me. Blain looked at me for a minute, but I guess he saw the determination in my eyes because he sighed and went to loosen them one at a time.

“You know the first thing we have to do, Pet.” He said when he was finished. He came over to me and let me to the cross. He started to undress me, but I stopped him, looking pointedly at Jordan. I didn’t want him to have to look at me naked. “I’ll leave your under garments on for now, but I have to strap you in. It’s time to learn the consequences for all of the rules you have broken.”

I had a feeling I knew what was going to happen and it made bile rise up my throat. I could handle anything he did to me, but I didn’t know how I was going to handle whatever he did to Jordan.

I was right. As soon as he had me down to my bra and panties and strapped onto the cross, he went over to an ember pit I hadn’t noticed before. He had it under a hood vent that wo ul d lead the smoke outside. He had several things stuck down in the red hot coals of the pit.

“Every time you disobey me, Jordan will pay the consequences.” He said, stirring the coals with a poker. “So far Pet, in the thirty minutes you have been here, you have pulled away and gone against my wishes four times, so it’s time for the punishment.” He turned to me with a branding iron with his real initials RB on it , showing me what he planned to use. It was red with the heat of the fire.

I shook my head franticly. ‘Punish me please, Master!’ I mouthed, not being able to move my hands. I guess he under stood because he laughed.

“No can do, Pet. I think this will work better in getting your behavior in order from the beginning .”

He went over to Jordan, tore his shirt open with his free hand, and pressed the branding iron over his heart. Jordan screamed, and God knows I felt his pain. If I could have screamed with him I would have. I never took my eyes off of him. I knew this was my punishment for bringing this psycho into our lives. For the first time since I received the call from him telling me to come, I really didn’t want to live through this. My brother was being tortured because of me, and I wanted to die.

He went back to the pit and traded implements, this time taking out the poker. Again he held it up to show me before going back to Jordan, jabbing it into his shoulder. I screamed and screamed, though no sound came out . I knew that the sound that came from Jordan would be burned in my memory, haunting me for however many more days I had left in this life, be it two days or fifty years. When he took it out, there was just a black hole there. The poker had cauterized the wound as Blain had made it, so it wasn’t bleeding.

Jordan slumped in his chair, and I realized he had passed out. Blain laughed and turned back to me.

“Well, I guess you get the idea.” He said, putting the poker back in the pit and walking over to me. He ran his fingers down my scarred cheek. “At least we can have some time alone. Where to start?” And he headed to the Wardrobe.

I prayed the triplets would be able to find us fast. Even if I didn’t want to live anymore, I knew I needed to keep my head and try to save Jordan anymore pain.

Chapter 22

He came back over to me with a metal rod about a foot long with a knob at the end in one hand, and a rubber plug with a finger loop at the end for easy handling in the other hand.

“I’ll have to prepare you. It’s been a while, so you’ll have to be stretched.”

I had a hard time keeping a straight face with that statement. Blain did always have a big ego, and last time I didn’t know any different, but my trips had thrice the size he had.

He set the items on a table and took a pocket knife out of his jeans pocket. He cut away at the side seams of my panties, not caring if he cut me, which he did both times. I looked over to Jordan to make sure he wasn’t awake for this. I didn’t want him to see me like this. I didn’t think it would be an image he would ever get over. Thankfully, Blain kept my bra on.

He set the knife down and got the rod. He didn’t check me or lube it up, he just shoved it in. I was so dry; it burned the whole way going in. He turned the knob at the end and it started vibrating, but instead of the pleasure it was supposed to induce, it only made me burn worse. I held the tears of pain back. I knew it would only make him get worse, and I knew he had o nly just begu n his ‘fun’.

“Now, I think you have earned a few lashings. What do you think?” Blain said as he walked around me, looking at me and rubbing the skin over my back lightly before walking back to the wardrobe to pick up the flogger. This flogger had about eight thin leather straps coming from the handle, and each strap broke off into four fingers about two inches long at the end. This toy that, when used right, tantalized the skin. It would just barely pinken the skin, drawing heat to the surface to m ake it more sensitive. But in Blain’s hands it leave s a bunch of little welts , and he never stop s just with that.

Every stroke stung, and the burn would last and bleed into the next strike. It was like he zoned into his own little world, and like it happened last time, the lashes started tearing skin. Lucky for me in a way, it didn’t hurt any worse at the moment and was still bearable. The burn was to the point I didn’t feel anything else. I tried to zone myself out where I wasn’t thinking of anything, but as soon as Blain saw this, he stopped deciding to switch my positions. He did take the time to wash the cuts, but it didn’t really help too much considering I was still bleeding. He rubbed some ointment on, and then carried me to the wooden horse. He bent me over the middle of it and strapped my wrists and ankles to the legs.

“You are so beautiful, Pet.” He said in a low husky voice . You would never be able to tell by hearing his voice that he was insane. He sounded like a truly living partner, and I guess in his twisted mind, that is what he was. He ran his hands softly and slowly over my back. I could tell he was tracing the scars he’d left last time. His hands rand down over the cheeks of my ass, and he took hold of the plug, pulling it out and pushing it back in, renewing the burn that had somewhat faded. He never had lubricated anything. I guess he was thinking all of this would turn me on, and I would have my natural lubrication, but it had the opposite effect.

By the time he stopped, my breath was coming out in ragged pants. I was getting light headed from the position he had me in. He had either forgotten to place the support for my head, or he didn’t care. At that point, I didn’t care. It would be a relief to be able to pass out from the blood rush to the head. I figured he was going to use the paddle on me, but he went instead to the ember pit, pulling out the branding iron.

I looked over to Jordan, thanking the good lord that he was still out, not being able to witness what Blain was doing, but I was getting worried about him too.

“I’m glad that my messages healed over, but you can’t see them as well anymore. I don’t like that. This brand will stay in place, it should heal nicely, and it will stay readable. I think two brands ought to do it.”

He walked behind me and I couldn’t see where he was headed with the brand. All of a sudden, pain exploded up my leg as he branded my calf. I screamed, but of course it was only air blowing out, no sound.

“Hmm. I like the way that came out.” He said as he walked back to the pit and set it in the hot coals to re-heat. Looking back at where I was, he ran his eyes over my body. “I think I might do a few of them. It’ll remind you not to let those three freaks of nature touch you.” His voice went hard, and he jerked the brand back out of the pit, heading back to me. “I saw the nasty whorish things you did with them.” And my back exploded in fire as he branded me in the small of my back.

My eyes followed him with blurred vision as tears filled my eyes .

After he put the brand back in the pit, he stormed back to me, grabbing my hair in his fist, jerking my head up to face him fully. My shoulders felt as if he’d ripped them from the sockets as his action pulled against my restraints.

“Yes, I have that whole house wired. I saw everything that would go on. I was witness to your little goodbye to them. I spent years there, watching you from afar, as they had asked me to, but no matter how faithful you remained to them; they couldn’t even come home when the time came. They didn’t deserve you. I loved you. I took care of you, though you didn’t even know I was there. I got tired of it. I was the one who deserved you, so I came into your life. I knew you were wary of people, not as outgoing as you’d once been. They brought you down, made you lose all of your confidence, and yet they come home and all is forgiven. You won’t forgive me, but you’ll forgive those arrogant assholes. I didn’t mean to get your face and throat. I lost control, and you won’t forgive me, but they purposely abandoned you and go running back.” He shouted as he let go of my hair and backhanded me. Pain exploded in my head, and I saw black spots forming in my eyes.

I caught sight of Jordan and saw his eyes open and a murderous look in his eyes. “You bastard!!” He yelled. “Look at her body! Look at her face! Listen to the breath coming from her because she can’t speak, and tell me you deserve her!”

I shook my head at him, silently pleading for him to shut up, but he wasn’t paying attention to me. He was going to make Blain kill him.

“What I did was all to bring her to the highest pleasure of her life!” Blain yelled back as he stormed over and punched Jordan in the stomach . “She tried to run from me. ME! So yeah, I lost control, but I would never let it happen again. She should know me well enough for that by now, but she won’t forgive me. She won’t give me another chance.”

Blain looked back over to me with a pleading look in his eyes, and all I could feel was disgust. The more he spoke, the more I could see how seriously disturbed he was. I guess the disgust showed on my face because his expression changed back to anger and he went straight for the pit to get the iron back out. The next thing I know, my shoulder blade erupted in fire as he branded me there. He threw the iron and it shattered the mirror across the room. He stormed over to the wardrobe and jerked it open. When he turned back around, he had the whip in hand.

Jordan looked at me with anguish in his eyes, tears silently falling. “I’m sorry, Sis.” I heard him whisper. I tried to smile at him, letting him know it was going to be alright, but I don’t think it came through on my face with all of the pain I was in.

‘Don’t look.’ I mouthed to him. He shook his head and I could see the determination in his eyes. I didn’t know what it was for, but I couldn’t let him see what was about to happen. ‘Please don’t watch. Close your eyes.’

Jordan knew me well enough to know it would hurt me more than the physical pain if he watched. He started crying in earnest when Blain uncoiled the whip. ‘I love you, Sis.’ He mouthed back to me before he closed his eyes and bowed his head, his shoulders shaking with his sobs. I watched as with each crack of the whip, his whole body flinched, as if he felt my pain, and I knew that to a certain extent, he did. I kept my eyes on him, my vision going dark, as I finally, blissfully , passed out and was able to escape the pain for a while.

***************************************************************************

I woke, feeling the straps being removed from my ankles in a rush. Blain came around to let my wrists go, but I couldn’t move . I heard a crash coming from upstairs, and then feet running down the stairs to the basement playroom we were in. The door, which had been open the whole time we’d been down here, was now closed. When I looked at Jordan, I saw him slumped over in the chair, bleeding from a stab wound in his chest, his eyes closed. I started crying again, but concentrated on his chest to see if he was breathing, and as I saw it move, the door was busted down.

Troy came in, gun in hand, followed by Tory and Luke.

Blain had snatched me up and was holding me off the ground. I could feel the edge of his pocket knife blade pressed against my throat.

“Let. Her. Go. Now!” Troy growled. Tory kept his eyes on me, but his gun was trained on Blain behind me. Luke had gone over to Jordan and was untying the ropes.

“No! Drop your guns now or she dies.” Blain said from behind me, and I could tell he was using me as a full body shield, his head even hiding behind mine.

Troy and Tory didn’t move and I felt Blain knick the skin at my throat. “I will slit her throat if you don’t drop them now.”

The boys looked at each other, and then slowly lowered their guns to the floor.

Blain must not have noticed the absence of the third triplet, but I did. I knew Toby was probably just out of sight waiting for his chance. I felt so weak and was still in a lot of pain, but seeing the guys here to save me, and knowing Jordan needed help, gave me a boost of adrenaline.

Everything happened quickly. I lifted my leg bending it at the knee and kicked backwards with all the strength I could muster, catching Blain in the kneecap, just as Luke had shown me to. He dropped me and not even a second later I heard two gunshots.

Landing on the floor, I was extremely dizzy, but I looked up and saw Toby holstering his gun, heading over to me with Tory and Troy beside him. Woods slipped his gun into the back of his pants and went to help Luke with Jordan.

The triplets all had tears welling in their eyes as they saw the state of my body. They surrounded me as the last of my strength left me and the darkness took over once more.

Epilogue

I had woke up two days later in the hospital, not because of injuries per say, but because the doctors needed to stitch me up and do a procedure to clean the lining of my uterus. When they had taken the vibrator and plug out, I had been bleeding. They said it was too early to tell if I was pregnant, but to stop the bleeding and make it safe for me to try for children in the future they had to do it. They had kept me under with medication until they felt like the pain would be more manageable.

Jordan was alright, but he had to spend a few days in the hospital to watch for infection. Blain had missed his heart by a few millimeters, and hadn’t hit anything else vital.

Unfortunately Melbourne had been killed when he’d been shot, but Bradley had made it. I met with Melbourne’s family to tell them what a hero I believed him to be and to apologize for everything that happened. His mother was so nice to me. She told me that John Melbourne had lived and died the way he’d always wanted to; serving and protecting the people. She told me that she didn’t think he’d have had any regrets. I paid for his funeral and memorial service, and still visit Mrs. Melbourne on occasion.

James and Shelby had been found at the pick-up point Blain had told Luke they would be at. They had some bruises, but otherwise were okay. They went ahead and got married two months after it was over, and Shelby went ahead and transferred down to South Carolina to be with our family. I told James that I’d be alright if he wanted to move north with her, but he didn’t want to leave me or Jordan.

Blain had been shot once in between the eyes and once in the heart. We didn’t know whose bullet hit where, Toby and Woods know of course, but I couldn’t really care less. He would have died with either shot, so I’m grateful to both of them .

It has been a year since my nightmare ended, and I couldn’t have been happier. Tory and I got married in the judge’s office at the county courthouse as soon as I had healed completely. He was so happy he had won the rock paper scissors tournament they had held to determine who would be my legal husband.

After James and Shelby got back from their honeymoon, she helped me plan our actual wedding ceremony that was held in the field in front of where I was rebuilding my house. Actually it would be Jordan’s house. I had bought James one as his wedding gift that was only a mile away on the property next to ours on the opposite side of the trips property. We would all be able to stay together with-in walking distance.

Luke was going to preside over the ceremony for us . He was licensed to be able to do weddings and funerals. Jordan, James, and I have adopted him into our family. Well actually all of the men who were there to help us have been, but Luke was special. He had trained me to be able to defend myself, and kept working with me on a daily basis. He had been the first to run to Jordan’s aide when the showed up to save us.

I hadn’t known that all of his family was dead, but when I did, I told him he would always be family to me. The crazy abusive boyfriend that had killed his cousin had also killed her parents , who had raised him . Luke had been overseas at the time, so it was especially difficult for him when he did find out.

Toby, Troy and Tory did start the mercenary company they had spoken about, but they promised that they would only run the business end, not go on any missions, and so far they have kept their word. They have two teams of five men that go in to do the jobs. So far they have rescued seven POWs and have another job lined up for each team coming up soon.

They run the ranch and train the horses. The Big T ranch is rapidly building its reputation for turning out show and rodeo horses. The boys have quite a few well known ranchers bringing their horse stock in to be trained up, and they are doing very well. We are thinking of restarting the breeding program that their granddad used to have, but they’ll need to hire more hands on for that, and they are reluctant to do that for obvious reasons.

Our wedding was one of fairy tales. We got married at twilight with all of the awesome colors in the sky. The trips each wrote vows for me as I did for them. They put a band on my finger to go with the set I married Tory with. All of them had three gold bands intertwined with one white gold band to represent the four of us. They were absolutely amazing.

We spent our honeymoon in a little villa in Florence, Italy. I had a week of three men waiting on me hand and foot in every way they could think of. Every morning would start with a walk around the beautiful grounds, and every evening consisted of a romantic dinner situated in some way so we could watch the colors in the sky as the sun went down. They knew that dawn and dusk were my two favorite times of day for that very reason.

We were celebrating our six month anniversary that night, and I had a surprise planned. I was so excited, and I wonder ed what their reaction s would be. I was in the kitchen finishing the fried chicken, mashed potato e s, green beans, and home-made biscuits I had made for them as they came in from working all day .

“Mmmm. Smells good in here, Pea.” Toby said.

“What’s the occasion?” Tory asked. He chuckled as I threw the dish towel at him. I knew he remembered our six month anniversary.

“Remember this morning?” Troy asked Tory with a smirk on his face.

Yep, they had woke me up in a way I wouldn’t mind being woke up with more often. I was so insatiable with the se men, and it seems that they we re the same way towards me. Each of them were always finding reasons to sneak in the house to find me. I had plenty of one on one time with them, but we still all slept together every night. Toby on the right, Troy on the left, and Tory in the middle sleeping in between my legs, his head resting on my breasts. I never had need of a blanket. They all kept me warm enough.

After they all washed up in the mud room, they sat at the table and I passed out their plates.

‘You boys go ahead and eat. I’ve already had my supper, and I want to go soak in a hot bubble bath.’ I told them.

*********************************************************************

I lost track of how long I’d been in the tub, and I think I actually dozed off for a few because the sudden movement of the water woke me up as Tory lifted me out of the tub. I slipped my arms around his neck, sucking on the skin right behind his ear. I knew it drove him crazy, and sure enough I felt the shudder go down his body.

“If you keep that up Mrs. Whiteside, we won’t be getting to the ma ssage we had planned for you.” He said in a husky voice.

I smiled against his neck, but I kept sucking. I wanted to mark him for some reason, so everyone would see. I felt a body behind me, and Toby whispered in my ear.

“Want to share the love?”

So I let go of Tory and turned to Toby, putting my arms around his neck, but before I could suck on his sweet spot, he pulled me up into a kiss. It was explosive and I didn’t think he was thinking of ma ssages. I could tell he had just gotten out of the shower as he wasn’t dried all the way yet. He walked me over to the bed and gently laid me down on some towels that were spread out on top of the comforter.

He went over to the lotion warmer I had bought, and brought it to the night stand so it could be in reach. He was going to do the ma ssage, but I wanted to skip it now. I had better things on my mind.

‘Come on, want to skip it, and just tell the others you did it?’ I asked him trying to entice him back over to me, but I got caught.

“I saw that, Cupcake.” Troy said as they laughed at me. He had a towel wrapped around his waist, and I was getting wetter the more I looked at my men. I was picturing all of the things I wanted to do to them. “Sorry baby, we have plans for you.”

I pouted at them. ‘What about the plans I had for you three?’

Toby gulped. “I don’t know if I want to ask what you had planned.”

“I’m sure we’ll cover it all, both what you want, and what we want.” Troy said as Tory walked back in the room completely naked.

I sighed. I knew I would be lucky to get through their ma ssage without attacking them. ‘I have something to tell all of you, and I wanted to make it special.’ I signed, getting nervous.

They all sat down, surrounding me on the bed. “What is it princess?” Tory asked as he stroked my stomach. I thought how appropriate that was and grabbed the others’ hands, placing them on my tummy as well .

I looked up at all of them and smiled as I realized that they would be just as thrilled as I was.

‘I’m going to have our baby,’

It was so funny. All three identical faces had identical looks of shock that changed at the same time to identical looks of pure joy. It was like they did share a mind ; a s it sometimes seemed they did.

“You are amazing, Pea.” Toby said as he kissed me.

“We are three of the luckiest men in the world.” Troy said as he kissed my knuckles like a gentlemen.

“You have made us the happiest men, and now daddies, on the planet.” Tory added, kissing my tummy.

“We love you, Mrs. Whiteside.” They said in unison.

And they spent the rest of the night showing me just how much.

Having Their Baby

(A Left Behind Afterward)

Jayton Young

Copyright © JaytonYoung2012

Published by Jayton Young at Smashwords

Warning: There is explicit sexual content in this book. (M/F/M/M) Ménage a Quatre

Blurb:

Being mute hasn’t stopped this momma from making her point.

Marti is at the end of her pregnancy; and the end of her rope with her three men. Why do men have to be so smart with most things, then let a woman get pregnant and their brains get fried. Watch as Marti tries to reign in her men and make them see the pregnant doesn’t mean cripple and incapable.

Excerpt

Oh God! The man could kiss like it was nothing, and my heart kept speeding up, knowing I was finally going to get me some. I was so happy and so excited; tears started streaming down my cheeks.

The way Tory had his huge hands placed around my head, his fingers threaded through my hair and his palms and thumbs stroking my cheeks, he felt when the tears started and paused in the kissing.

NO! Blasted pregnancy hormones were not going to stop us now! I grabbed his hair, best as I could with him keeping it so short, and pulled him to me as he tried to back away to see what was wrong, but he was stronger than me and got away, looking at me with concern. I wanted to stomp my foot in frustration, but I knew that would be taking it too far to the childish side. Big, stupid, sensitive, Mr. Let’s Talk About It. I turned around balled my fist and let out a silent scream. At least he wouldn’t catch me acting like a two year old.

“Quit screaming and talk to me.” He said as he walked around to be in front of me again.

Stupid me, I forgot how they all knew me all too well. I took a deep breath, and prayed for the patience I had been lacking lately.

‘I am an eight month pregnant sex deprived hormonal woman.’ I signed slowly, using my non-existent patience. ‘I was just happy and ready to finally get some love from you.’

“Oh, baby, I’m so sorry. I always thought it was stupid, but Toby and Troy keep thinking about the ‘what if’s and I had to go along. You know the saying; bros before h…wives and all that.” He looked down at his feet and decided to get undressed, hoping I wouldn’t say anything about the almost slip. I wanted to laugh, but that would have ruined the affect. I stopped him from undressing and just stared at him.

“Aw now, don’t look at me like that.” He said, standing back straight and pulling me into his arms. “You know I speak without thinking sometimes.”

‘And I love you anyway.’ I said as I pulled away enough to use my hands. ‘Just don’t ever come close to saying that again’

I ran my hands slowly up his chest, and then, starting from the top, unbuttoned his shirt, running my fingers over his skin, getting the feel of him again. Just the thought of making love to Tory had my juices dripping down my legs. I couldn’t wait.

It wasn’t just the sex, though that was beyond wonderful, it was the connection and intimacy we shared during our love-making that I longed for. I kissed across his chest, paying attention to his quarter sized dusky nipples, knowing his were extremely sensitive. Sure enough he moaned and moved his hands to my hips to pull me in where I could feel how hard his erection was.

I slid his flannel work shirt down his arms until he let go of me long enough to let it drop, but we forgot about the cuffs. It was hilarious watching him pull and tug, and ultimately get tied up in his shirt sleeves, but I helped him out of it anyway. I was so ready to get us both naked.

Looking in his eyes, I pulled him back to me by his belt loops, and unfastened his jeans as I attacked his mouth with mine. I nipped his bottom lip to get him to open up, and the jerk smiled, knowing that I was lost. I had never been this needy or out of control, and that seemed to please him. If wouldn’t have been counterproductive to my goals for my husbands, I would have held out, but that kind of revenge could wait until it suited me better.

I shoved his pants down his legs, but didn’t allow him the time to take them off before I turned us toward the bed and pushed him down on it. If it hadn’t been for his legs being tangled in his pants, I know I wouldn’t have been able to move him.

“Slow down, Princess. I’m not going anywhere.” He said, chuckling as he watched me undress as fast as I could, throwing my dress and not caring where the hell it landed.

He finished taking his jeans off, and had to catch me as I almost fell over. I had lost my balance as all the weight on the front of me pulled me over.

“Be careful, baby.” He said as he actually lifted me up like it was nothing and put me on the bed with him. I had gained fifty pounds during the last eight months and he still acted like I weighed nothing, but oh well. I would think about that later.

I was about to pull him down to me so I could get his mouth again, and maybe encourage a little more, when the door opened.

I had come to terms with never being able to make another sound; I really had, but in that moment, when Troy came into the room, all I wanted to do was scream out my frustration for everyone to hear.

I looked at Tory and he looked ashamed.

With that one look, he broke my heart. I knew they all loved me. In the back of my mind, I knew that, but at that moment all I could think was, ‘how could he be ashamed to want his wife?’ Maybe I was too fat now. I knew how I looked, and I had fretted over it, but all three of them had assured me I was as beautiful as ever. They even said I was even more so because I was carrying our children, and I glowed. I had believed them, they had never cared about all of my scars, but if it were true, why were they all avoiding intercourse with me? Why would Tory be ashamed of me?

I covered my face and turned my back on them, not being able to see the disgust I thought I would see on Troy’s face. I had started getting out of bed when I felt Tory put his hand on my arm to stop me.