["I'm Clappin' and Shoutin'" playing]
It'll be bottom of the fourth inning by now.
Could've watched the whole game and been back already.
Maybe there's a radio around here somewhere.
God forbid we enjoy ourselves.
This whole waiting ordeal is barbaric.
Found the break room.
And there's some very nice candy stripers.
- [person 1] Good man. - [chuckles] Here you go. [sighs]
- [person 1, person 2] Cheers. - Cheers.
[maternity patient wailing]
You'd think the hospital would invest in some thicker drywall.
[chuckles]
[grunting, wailing]
[wailing continues]
[groaning]
Would you like anesthesia?
How much is it?
It depends on how many units we use, but typically somewhere in the $45 range.
If I knew it would cost that much, I would've just made it myself.
[chuckles]
[grunting, groaning]
All right, my dear.
- It's time. Oh, yes. - No, I can't.
- No, no, no, no. - Ladies.
- [nurse 1] Yes, you can. - I can't. I can't. [sobs]
I can't. [pants]
I found a little extra of the happy stuff. On the house.
[groaning]
[Calvin] Elizabeth?
[Elizabeth] Calvin?
Elizabeth.
[gasps] Calvin?
It's okay. I'm here. Eyes on me.
[breathing shakily] I'm scared.
[shushes] We'll do this together. I promise.
I'm so glad that you're here.
I need you. I thought that you left.
[Calvin] No, I'm not going anywhere.
[breathing shakily] But-- But you did.
I'm right here.
[Calvin] Eyes on me.
[Elizabeth groans]
All right, here we go.
[pants, groans]
[baby crying]
["Wham (Re Bop Boom Bam)" playing]
[baby crying in distance]
[people chattering]
[Elizabeth whimpers]
Your daughter is just fine.
You drugged me.
You're welcome. Do you need to urinate?
No, I do not.
For the next few weeks,
it will likely feel like the fire of a thousand suns each time you go,
but that will fade.
And then you'll likely notice some urinary incontinence,
but that usually resolves itself after a year or so.
Now, why don't I go get your baby girl?
- By the way, what's her name? - Hadn't thought about it.
I always tell new mothers not to overthink it.
A name is a name.
Or if you're really stuck, just go with what you feel right now.
- Mad. - Oh, lovely.
I have a niece named Maddie.
No. Just "Mad."
Oh.
[cooing]
Hello.
[clicks tongue] Aw, isn't she perfect?
Indeed.
Word to the wise, the doctors will tell you to stay off your feet for a week,
but they've never given birth.
I'd try to stay as long as possible.
My husband is currently camping.
How long have you been here?
Going on two weeks.
Oh, no. No. I can't afford that, and I need to get back to my work.
[chuckles] Your work?
[clicks tongue] She's your job now.
Fuck.
[sighs]
- [sighs] - [cooing]
Mad.
Who are you going to be?
[children laughing, chattering]
[Mad crying]
- [sighing] Please. - [screaming]
Tell me. [sighs] What is it?
Just tell me. Just tell me.
Please. Do you just not like me?
[crying continues]
Come on. Mad.
[sighs] Please.
Mad, succumb to primitive instinct.
- [crying continues] - Come on. Come on. Come on.
Well, nothing's working. [sighs]
Please, Mad. I'm begging you. Tell me what you need.
[phone ringing]
[ringing ends]
Fine. Cry as much as you want. Cry until next month for all I care.
- I don't care. Please. - Hey, hey, hey, hey.
[shushes]
- [crying stops] - [sighs]
It's okay. [shushing]
- [phone ringing] - [crying resumes]
[sighs]
[Six Thirty whines, panting]
[fusses]
- [Elizabeth sighs] - [Mad coos]
[TV clicks]
[patriotic music playing]
[announcer] A naval carrier arrived in San Francisco Bay from Pusan today,
returning over 300 brave heroes from our shores.
Hundreds of family members and onlookers lined the docks to cheer
- and embrace these brave servicemen... - [giggling]
...as they return home from a six-month tour at sea.
One hero comes back to meet his young son for the first time.
- Look! It's Daddy. I see Daddy. - While others include wives...
No, baby, that's not Daddy.
Daddy has to stay a little longer to take care of his patients,
help them get home.
Also seen docking were the two transport ships carrying hundreds of our brave...
Well, it's almost 8:00 p.m., which means...
- I wanna do it. - Okay.
[announcer continues indistinctly]
[child 1] One, two...
three, four, five, six,
- seven, eight. - [child 2] Ten weeks?
No, eight weeks until Daddy's home.
- How many days is that, Mommy? - Too many.
[sighs]
[Mad wailing]
[fussing]
[shushes]
[crying]
It's okay. Okay. Okay. Okay, okay. [sighs]
We're okay. Okay.
All right. All right. All right.
Are you hungry? Is that the problem?
- [Harriet] Junior! Let's go inside... - [Junior giggles]
...thank you.
- [both laughing] - Gonna get you. I'm gonna get you.
[Mad crying]
All right. [grunts, chuckles]
What is the number one rule of all outdoor games?
[Junior] Do not track mud into the house.
[Harriet] Right.
Linda, we're having dinner!
- [crying continues] - [shushes]
[jazz playing]
- [Elizabeth] Hi. - Hi.
She won't eat.
My doctor suggested formula
but there's a study out of Columbia that suggests that
breast milk is the singular conduit for antibodies from mother to infant.
Not to mention that breastfeeding releases oxytocin,
but I don't think that oxytocin is gonna help us when she dies of starvation.
And I have so much to do, and I can't do a to-do list
because then it's one more thing to do.
Okay. I'm exhausted just listening to you.
- Come on. - [breathes shakily]
- [Mad screams] - Oh, God. I'm so sorry.
- It's fine. - I'm not myself. I can leave.
I am making tea in the kitchen anyway. Does anybody need anything?
- No, thanks. - No, I'm fine.
[crying continues]
[stammers] I can go. I'm-- I'm fine.
Yeah, you seem great.
I've tried to get her on a schedule. I've been meticulous about timing.
I've been monitoring every cry, every bowel movement.
I've been trying various positions and angles, light levels--
[chuckles]
- [Mad fussing] - What at all is funny about this?
[sighs] You are so much like him.
So incredibly smart and so, so stupid.
Excuse me?
She's a baby. [chuckles]
She's not a controlled science experiment.
No, I just don't think that you understand. I didn't want this.
And now I don't think I'm feeling the way that I'm supposed to be feeling.
Oh, you mean that the way her smile cures your swollen abdomen
and the excruciating pain in your nipples,
because you weren't even a whole person until you met her, right?
- Yeah, that. - Yeah, that's bullshit.
Complete fiction.
No. Moms love their children. It's in their biology.
It's just, my biology is making me have terrible thoughts in my head.
What kind of thoughts?
You can say it.
[sighs] Like, what if I just gave her away?
[clicks tongue] Hey, Agnes.
How many times did you think about giving Bailey up when he was brand new?
[chuckles] Why? Is somebody offering?
[chuckles] Purely for research purposes.
- The answer is twice. A day. [chuckles] - [chuckles]
[inhales sharply] My breaking point with Linda? Day six.
So, you're saying at some point Mad and I will have a relationship
built on mutual love and respect?
Mad? As in Madeline? Is that a family name?
Um, no. The nurse just told me to name her what I felt.
[laughs] You're kidding.
I should have named my kids Scared and Exhausted.
- [chuckles] - [wheezes, sniffs]
I will say, it's very nice to talk to another adult
instead of just hearing bloodcurdling screams.
[Mad whines]
Aw, let me take a look at this baby.
Okay.
- [Mad coos] - [gasps] Hello, Mad.
Aw, you're so good, aren't you? Yes, you are.
You'd be surprised how much you can learn about a baby at this stage.
They're constantly revealing their future selves in the smallest of ways.
And this one, she can read a room.
- Yes, you can. - [cooing]
Aw, that's our girl.
Oh, good work. [speaks indistinctly]
Who can tell me what a family tree is, hmm?
A family tree is a way to learn where you came from.
Duane, hands to yourself, please.
Your mommy goes in here, and your daddy goes in here.
Your parents can help you do this.
They'll have all the answers.
[sighs]
[mail slot opens]
[Six Thirty barking]
[Mad crying]
- No. - No?
No.
You can't take out a second mortgage if you don't have a job to pay it off.
Yes, well, I need to get back to my research. Once I publish--
Nope, no, no.
That is theoretical. We're a bank. We deal in certainty.
You should be grateful your husband put you on the deed before he died.
That is quite the feat, using "grateful" and "died" in the same sentence.
As soon as your child is old enough, get her in school.
Then find a job that actually pays,
or marry rich.
I could certainly rob a bank.
Please schedule a time with our security guard on your way out.
[Elizabeth] I have come up with an appropriate hourly rate
based on your yearly salary with markup, because you will be submitting this work
as if you're the only person that touched it.
And what will that hourly rate be?
Eight dollars.
An hour? [scoffs] You're joking. [chuckles]
I agree. You're paid shockingly well.
[Mad cooing]
Fine. [sighs]
What's the issue with my experiment?
You have two problems.
One, the temperature is too high on this. You need to lower it by 15 degrees.
Okay. And the other?
Unsolvable.
- ["Sentimental Journey" playing] - [sighs]
Please don't tell the other chemists I was here.
Of course not.
See ya. [sighs]
- Hmm. There's a baby. - I'm sorry.
Mm-hmm.
[Elizabeth] Don't touch that.
[snoring]
[Mad crying]
[grunts] Hey. [murmurs]
[Elizabeth] Eight dollars, please.
- [chemist] This stays between us, right? - [Elizabeth] Naturally.
Good-- Ooh, ooh, ooh. Okay.
♪ Got my bag And got my reservation ♪
♪ Spent each penny I could afford ♪
♪ Like a child in wild anticipation ♪
♪ I'd like to hear that "All aboard!" ♪
[mumbles]
Huh.
[sighs] Thanks again.
It's always nice to get a second pair of eyes.
Just in case, you know.
Ah. This was all my wife wanted when she got back from the hospital. [chuckles]
I'm surprised I haven't seen Boryweitz. I figured he'd be first in line.
Oh, no. They transferred him to DNA.
DNA?
Yep. He and Donatti are holed up in-in there in, uh-- uh,
in Evans's old lab actually.
[clicks tongue]
[huffs]
[grunts]
Elizabeth? Oh--
[Donatti] Miss Zott.
Oh, and this must be Madeline. How precious is she?
[sighs] You've stolen our work.
[Boryweitz] Elizabeth, we can explain.
W-What exactly are we being accused of here?
You have protocol that I wrote taped on this wall.
You are referencing our lab notebooks, our paper.
Did you think I wouldn't recognize my own work?
Congratulations, Miss Zott.
We received the Remsen.
We even-- We put your name here in the acknowledgments.
You do not know what any of this means. You do not know the implications
or what it means for the field or our understanding of the world.
So, I will be furthering our research.
Our research!
And I will make it greater, and I will do it faster and more successfully,
because I am a scientist, and you are a thief!
And you are a fraud.
[sighs]
We take nothing from no one.
[children chattering]
Why are you wearing boy shoes?
They're just shoes.
Then why are they the same color as Jimmy's?
I'm gonna tell Jimmy you have the same shoes.
- I have girl shoes. At home. - [bully] Jimmy!
[children laughing]
[sighs]
[radio chatter]
[static on radio]
[Mad snoring]
[grunts]
[sighs]
Elizabeth. I swear to God.
I've been the handyman in my house for over three years now.
It was either learn on the job or have to ask for help anytime the toilet leaked.
- [grunts] - Thank you.
[sighs] Yeah, I'm just trying to keep the peace in the neighborhood.
All right, let there be... light. [chuckles]
All right, there we are.
[sighs] Now for the best part of home improvements.
What have you got to drink around here?
Oh, I have five synthetic blends of formula. [chuckles]
- [chuckles] - Oh, and this.
Oh, perfect.
[sighs]
- That I can't teach you. [chuckles] - [chuckles]
Wait.
It's been six hours.
That is by far the longest that Mad has slept uninterrupted.
While I'm doing construction, of course.
Mom's getting the hang of it.
Hmm.
Can I ask you a potentially invasive question?
We'll find out.
I've been thinking about our conversation the other day.
Did you not plan to get pregnant?
[clears throat]
Uh, I was finishing law school when I found out.
And Charlie was starting his residency, so I waited.
And then Junior came along, and I waited again.
And then Charlie got deployed and--
You see the pattern. [scoffs]
Do you regret it?
If I could go back knowing what I know now,
I'd change some things.
But I do know that the woman sitting here today,
who raised two kids mostly on her own,
is far more resilient for it.
There's been a lot of pain but, uh,
what I didn't see coming was that my capacity to experience joy
would grow along with it.
[chuckles] No.
I don't regret having my kids. But I do have regrets.
I'm mostly too tired to think about it.
[chuckles]
I know you said it's normal to feel doubt and guilt,
but I'm still not having those magical moments.
[sighs] They'll come.
[sighs]
Not that, uh, this is my area of expertise but, um... [chuckles]
...well, say you do get this crazy pseudo-lab kitchen up and running
without exploding the whole neighborhood. Then what?
Well... [sighs] ...Calvin and I did not get the grant that we were chasing,
so my plan is to finish our research.
And if I can publish on my own, I can get into any lab I want.
Right.
But don't you need chemicals
and... [stammers] ...equipment for chemical experiments?
Mm-hmm.
"Hi. Hi. I-It's-- It's Fran Frask."
[groans] No.
"Hey-- Hey, toots."
[groans] Not that.
"Hi. Hi."
[hums]
[clicking tongue]
Hi there. It's Fran Frask from Hastings.
[stutters] Yeah.
So, I am calling because I--
I wanted to place an irregular order for our new satellite lab.
It'll-- It-- Yep. L-Laboratory vacuum?
[stammers] We need another one.
Bunsen burners, graduated cylinders, beakers... [continues indistinctly]
So, what's this lab do?
[clicks tongue] I am not at liberty to say.
["True Love Ways" playing]
Hmm.
To protect, uh, mucosal membranes from noxious fumes?
Precisely.
Here you go.
Hey.
I never told you about my brother.
You told me a little bit.
I knew him better than anybody in the world.
It was almost like there was an imprint of him on me.
I could feel him so clearly in every interaction,
in every room that I entered.
I know exactly what he would say if he was here right now.
But I can't do that with you
because there's so much more that I don't know than I do know.
What do you wanna know?
I didn't have anyone either.
I wanna know everything.
I wanna know what you were like as a boy.
I wanna know what kind of father you would be.
I know I didn't tell you, but you know that I loved you, right?
[jazz playing]
[knocking]
[scoffs]
[gasps, screams]
[both chuckling]
[sobbing]
[Charlie sighs, moans]
[Harriet sobbing]
What are you doing, showing up here like this?
Your plane doesn't land for another two nights.
A seat opened up on a C-124 out of Landstuhl, and I snagged it.
[chuckles, sniffles] I don't know what any of that means.
- [Charlie chuckles] - [Linda] Daddy!
- [moans] My baby girl. [laughs] - [Harriet chuckles]
[Charlie sighs]
[sighs] How tall are you? 6'?
I'm 48".
- [chuckles, sniffles] - [chuckles]
Hey there, bubba. It's okay.
[sighs]
You know, your mom told me how brave you've been since I've been gone.
- I thought you might like this. - [Harriet chuckles, sighs]
Do you wanna give your daddy a hug?
Maybe after some ice cream?
- Ice cream. - [chuckles] There it is.
[groans] I've dreamt about this hug.
["I'm Back Pretty Baby" playing]
[chuckles] You can just put it right in the kitchen.
- [children chuckling] - Oh. [chuckles]
- Ray, you better play this one first. - Mmm. Okay. All right.
Ooh. You look like trouble.
- [sighs] Mmm. - Hello.
- You tried Agnes's corn bread? - [Harriet] Mmm. She made sure of it.
- [Charlie] Hey. Hello. - Oh. [chuckles] Hey.
- Get over here. - [Charlie chuckles]
Charlie, this is Elizabeth Zott.
[sighs] I'm so sorry for your loss.
Is that molasses on the ribs?
That's impressive.
It's Kansas City style, the way my dad used to make it.
- What do we have here? - Uh, blackberry pie.
How good we talking? I won't be shown up in my own home.
- Mmm. Then you might not wanna serve it. - [chuckling]
Come on.
Jodie, Rhoda, Agnes. You remember Elizabeth?
- How you doing? - [both] Hi.
Hi. It is really nice to see you at a time
when norepinephrine isn't coursing through my body,
triggered by an acute flight-or-fight response.
I don't know the science, but I do remember the feeling.
- ["Joe Hill Boogie" playing] - Oh. We're dancing now.
- Hey. - [Harriet] Oh.
- [Agnes] Yes. - [Jodie] All right.
- [group chuckling] - [Agnes] Whoo!
- [Jodie] Come on. - [shrieking]
- [Harriet] That's right. [laughing] - [chattering]
[song continues]
Hello there, little one.
Harriet mentioned this unbelievable blackberry pie.
I'm Curtis Wakely.
Elizabeth Zott. How do you know the Sloanes?
[Wakely] I just met them.
I'm taking over for my father as reverend at First Baptist.
If you ever need a reverend or a taste tester,
I'd be more than happy to oblige.
[chuckles] Well, you're happy to taste test anytime.
Not so much for church?
My father was a preacher, so I have a complicated relationship with faith.
- [Wakely] Mm-hmm. - Plus, I'm a scientist,
so I have a complicated relationship with faith.
I welcome the debate.
There's just not much of a debate
when one side has proof and the other has guilt.
[song fades]
- [song resumes] - [Mad cooing]
- I'm so-- It was lovely to meet you. - You as well.
What you guys got there?
It's a spinning top.
Spinning top? Do you see that? Ooh.
[Charlie moans, sighs]
I miss seeing you at that sink, Chief Surgeon Sloane.
[chuckles]
[moans]
Baby. [chuckles]
Was today too much too soon?
[sighs, chuckles] Yes, probably.
[chuckles] But it was also great to see everyone again.
Yeah. I saw you and Sanford in cahoots again.
How's he doing?
He's good.
He's still at Kaiser Sunset.
Said they're looking for a new chief resident in General Surgery.
You haven't even been back a week.
The money is good, Harr. It's really, really good.
Yeah? How about the hours?
The hours will be the hours.
- This is a huge opportunity. - For you.
I feel like I've been putting myself on hold for a long time now.
What does that mean?
I signed up to take the bar exam in the spring.
Eugene offered me a position as junior associate if I pass.
- When were you gonna tell me? - Now.
- And-- - There's an "and"?
And I've been asked to chair the Adams Washington Committee
to keep this neighborhood from turning into a freeway on-ramp.
Did I become Mr. Harriet Sloane when I was gone?
It's a lot to carry for the both of us.
We'll make it work.
[scoffs] And how in the world are we gonna do that?
Our kids need us both.
I'm not worried.
Yeah? Why not?
Because it's you and me.
[knocking]
- Dr. Mason? - Miss Zott, how are things?
Good.
Not to make this about me, but I had the most god-awful row this morning.
Oh, wow.
It's messy, I know.
Haven't heard from you in a while and thought I'd check in.
[sighs] You look tired.
What about help? You have someone?
My neighbor drops by.
Excellent. Proximity is critical.
And you're taking care of yourself? Erging?
W-When I can find the time.
Hmm.
I know I said a year, but our two-seat fractured his leg,
so I need you as soon as possible. Next week at the latest.
- What? No. I'm-- - Tired? Busy?
Probably going to argue you don't have time.
- Because I don't. - Who does?
Being an adult is overrated, don't you think?
Just as you solve one problem, ten more pull up.
But a chilly splash of water to the face off starboard, just before dawn?
It fixes things.
[clicks tongue] Well, off to the hospital.
I'll see you next week, two-seat.
I love you.
I know.
[chuckles]
[sighs]
I was just thinking about your dad.
He used to say that jazz taught him how to think.
How to sit and let the ideas carry him where they may.
He had a lot of notions.
And dance moves.
- [gurgles] - [chuckles]
Wait, do you think that's funny? [chuckles]
- [giggling] - [chuckling]
[phone ringing]
Sloane residence.
Listen to this. [chuckles]
- Come on, Mad. - [feet tapping]
Uh, w-what exactly am I supposed to be hearing?
She was-- She was just laughing. [chuckles]
Is that even normal for a child her age?
[sighs] I think she might be quite advanced, unsurprisingly.
I just hope she gets her parents' characteristic humility.
[sighs]
What's wrong?
[shakily] I can't make my family tree.
It's okay. I can't do mine either.
[sniffles, grunts]
[school bell ringing]
Hi.
- Hi, Daddy. - Hey, honey.
- Hi, Mom. - [Elizabeth] Hmm.
[Mad] Hey, Six Thirty.
So, tell me, how was school?
I don't think Mrs. Mudford likes me.
Highly improbable.
Every time I ask a question, her mouth goes like this.
Mmm? That is a scowl. Or a grimace.
What's the difference between a scowl and a grimace?
There isn't. They're synonyms.
Oh, I see.
Did you like your lunch today?
Yes. It was very delicious.
Did you like the pumpkin muffins I made? I tried a new recipe.
Oh, I loved them.
Madeline Zott,
I did not make pumpkin muffins. I made peanut butter brownies.
You are not eating your lunch, and worse, you are lying to me.
So, we will not be leaving this spot until you tell me why.
[elder] Now, when I was a girl... [sighs]
...the war made it impossible for my mother to find stockings.
So, she would knit stockings herself,
but without the waistband.
So, they were just... socks.
- Which is to say... [continues indistinctly] - [sighs]
Our numbers are more flaccid than my dick.
Older women love her. They find her comforting.
No, Walter, they find her boring.
And besides, we need men to watch,
because men have money to buy things from our sponsors,
so I have money to buy things.
This is Gerta's last day and possibly her last breaths on this earth.
Phil, at least let her do a goodbye show.
The crone is out. Fill the slot.
[sighs]
Someone young but elegant.
Someone maternal but fuckable.
Maternal and fuckable. Got it.
[Walter sighs]
[Elizabeth] Ma'am, I am here to see Walter Pine.
[secretary] He's not available.
Ah. Mr. Pine.
Uh, nurse auditions are downstairs to your left.
No, I am here to discuss the matter concerning my daughter's lunches with you.
- Lunch? - Correct.
Can I go get a snack?
Yeah. Uh, sure, honey. Go-- Go see Sharon.
I'm sorry, who are you, and why are you in my office right now?
I am Elizabeth Zott, Madeline Zott's mother.
[stammers] Have a seat.
No, this is not a seated kind of conversation.
Your daughter has been taking my daughter's lunch every day for months.
Which really just leads me to wonder,
is she not having nutritious meals provided to her by her provider?
Okay. [clears throat] My daughter's extremely well-fed.
I'm aware, because I'm the one that's been feeding her.
- [scoffing] - [sighing] Mr. Pine.
I do wish that I had the time or the resources to feed both our daughters,
but as it stands, I have two jobs.
Well, three if you consider being a parent, which I do.
And as a parent, I will not compromise on good food.
Good food is a primary catalyst from which my daughter will grow.
Good food is not a hobby. It--
It is community, it is family, and it is essential.
Out of concern for your daughter, I brought my chicken pot pie recipe.
Along with a sample so that you can taste the crumble of the crust
and the viscosity of the filling.
I also have oatmeal cookies or-- No. Mm-mmm.
I'm going to keep these on principle.
Well, I'll leave one, for Amanda.
Do not split that cookie with your father.
He wasn't very busy.
What? Oh. Oh.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
- Have you lost your mind? - Sorry.
I'm a television producer,
and I believe that you are poised to become a force in afternoon TV.
Which is why I would like to offer you a job
as the new host of RBLA TV's latest cooking show. [sighs]
Are you concussed?
[stammers] Uh, n-no.
Mr. Pine, I am a scientist. A scientist who does not watch television.
[stammers] Please, just-- just think about it.
And I did. I've considered it. Please move your feet.
[sighs]
I was raising my hand, but she wasn't looking at me.
Schemes.
[speaking indistinctly]
[chuckles] Why?
[speaking indistinctly]
[sighs]